Chapter 83

Aurora

I see my parents.

They were always so supportive. I never expected them to want to have children. We lived a hard life, the three of us brought up in a world where commoners are mistreated and slaughtered, if not used by royals as nothing but slaves. I always figured it would be hard for me to bring up children, knowing they could see the same fate as so many others I have witnessed fall victim to royals before.

Meeting Jaxson changed all of that, but not at first. I still recall the coincidental moment that made him find me, and I recall spending so many days and weeks thinking it was a nightmare, that I had gone crazy and my mind was unsafe for me. I couldn’t come to accept what he claimed to be true. He had to have been mistaken.

I see the moments where I asked him to just reject me, to make both of our lives simpler, but my mate never gave into that outcome. I even rejected him and it only pushed him further to be with me. It sent us closer together. It made sense at the time to allow him to run out his desire and to ultimately give up on having me as a mate.

It was never that I didn’t want Jaxson, but that I thought he would never want me, after spending so long trying to prove the opposite. He held me when I was weak, and he listened to me when I was poorly. He was the one person I could count on when I was in need of more than a friend, and he never gave up on having me accept him.

Having pups with him is terrifying, sure, but I’ve come to realize that Jaxson is a protector first. He would never allow something ill to happen to our family, to me and our mating bond, and if he was willing to fight me so hard to accept our mating bond, then he would fight ten times harder to keep an outside force from pulling us apart. He has gained my love, my trust, and the fierce protective instincts he holds has no competition to anyone who would oppose us.

I picture our every encounter at once, his many faces flashing through my mind instantly. His love, his anger, his shock and his disapproval, his protectiveness over me, his sadness as the pain of thinking he has lost me forever. Nothing compares to the moment I finally embraced his mating mark. He was so happy, so damn excited that this was the final time we would have to go through lose to gain each other back and be stronger than ever before.

My eyes are heavy, my body is weakened and tired, but I finally give into the natural pull.

I fight to make this process easier, painless, and it’s a lie I tell myself to just stay conscious. I feel Jaxson holding me, his hands squeezing mine, or vis-versa, and I dare to not fight him on letting go of my grip if it is too much but he doesn’t pull away.

A scream escapes my lips, like yelling down the vacancy of a tall well, and it takes everything I have to not swallow the passionate agony of what my body is being put through. I have to scream, I have to let it ripple through my throat until I taste blood, and the pressure in my stomach feels like I’m being trampled by beasts twenty-times larger than my size. I flex once, then twice before I utterly give up.

“It’s not enough,” I hear a woman pant, her voice full of concern.

“She’s doing her best,” Jaxson growls, not to be harsh, but in that protective voice of his, as usual. “Come on, sweetheart, hang in there. You’re doing great. I just need you to fight harder.”

I pant, my eyes sulking in darkness. “I—I—Can’t—”

“Bullshit,” he growls, his tone vibrating against my body. “You can do anything, sweetheart.”

I only shake my head, my body in rough trembles as I feel so useless to the world right now.

“I believe in you, sweetheart, please do the same,” he says, practically begging at this point. “You are the strongest Luna alive. I believe in you. Just do your best.”

I go limp for just a second, long enough to inhale a sharp, pained breath.

With a single scream, I allow the sheer pain to consume me again, my body shrieking and trembling in agony as the pain is unbearable to fight at this rate. I have been in pain for so many weeks now, just trying to maneuver my size around the hut has been a struggle, and while I have grown attached to the life in my womb, I can’t bare the thought of going through a single second more of this pain without losing my damned mind.

“There you go,” the female voice hums, soon drowned out by the sounds of whimpering and howling of a different kind. “Keep it up!”

I find the strength to open my eyes, my vision so blurry as I focus in and out of consciousness, the unbearable agony of this experience finally taking me by the throat. I cough to breath, my head falling back, weak and useless. I curl into my mate, forcing every breath like it will ultimately be my last.

“Here we go, another one!”

I scream again, Jaxson’s hand soothingly holding my head into his side, a cold rag brushing across my face, the cool air releasing the burning hot temperature that has overcome my cheeks. The sounds of churlish screams make my head spin and I grow nauseous, even when I haven’t had a thing to eat today, just incase this would happen.

“We’re losing her, Alpha!”

Jaxson growls a noise, somewhere in the darkness near me, no longer able to feel him pressed to my side. He part my lips with his finger, the distinguishable taste of blood finding it’s way onto my tongue, making me feel ill. It soothes me moments later, though, and I feel a rush of power bolt through my body at once.

I force a single, lasting burst of energy through my muscles and the sounds of screams intensify as the pain exits my body all at once. I feel limp, useless, and I collapse into unconsciousness. It’s calm here, quiet, and I actually prefer it to the alternative. Jaxson is still somewhere near me, even as my mind drifts away, I still feel him there with my body, as though carrying me through the oblivion himself.

Once again, I see my parents. I see them proud of their only daughter, watching her go through so much pain and trying to fight like hell to make her life complete. They never thought I would accept a mate that wasn’t Luke, my best friend, and I’m sure they hardly accepted I would want pups so soon after a mating ceremony when I turned twenty years of age, but the moon goddess has always had bigger plans for me. For me and Jaxson.

I should be there with him now. I fight to regain my strength, my eyes wet with fresh tears, my body still shivering with the impact of pain I was never prepared to go through. Jaxson is crying, a sight I’ve only seen a handful of times and each one not as emotionally charged as this time. He looks at me with such admiration, such pride, and I fight to hold onto the sight of my mate as he lays beside me in bed, my body weak and my mind stalling in a dark haze.

Jaxson glances down, and I follow his glare, seeing three, tiny albeit perfect babies spread across our laps. I examine each one tirelessly, so fearful that they are injured or imperfect or some other irrational thought that pops into my mind. But no, they are indeed perfect.

“Perfect, like you,” Jaxson breathes, emotionally drained by now, I am sure. “I love you, sweetheart. I knew you could do it.”

I relax with those words, holding my pups in their fleshy, worldly forms.