Chapter 3

I did everything in secret.

My visa application, the funding letters from the scholarship office, my program documents, everything got mailed to Dr. Sutton's office. Nothing came to the house. I couldn't let anyone find out. Especially Mason.

Not that he was paying much attention to me that week. He was busy making Bella a guide.

I found out from her Instagram story. It was a screenshot of a Google Doc called Bella's College Survival Guide. Twenty-three pages, color-coded tabs. How to do laundry. Which dining hall had the good waffles. What to do if your roommate was weird.

Thank god for Mason. I'd literally be so lost without him.

Mason liked it. Ten minutes later, he texted me.

Your sister is SO much work lol. Gonna keep her busy so she leaves you alone out there. Happy, Claire?

I didn't answer.

An hour later, he called.

"Hey. You mad at me?" His voice had that easy, teasing lilt. "I didn't make you a guide because I am your guide, babe."

"I'm not mad. You can make her whatever you want. That's your business."

"Then why are you ghosting me?" He sighed. "I didn't even want to do the stupid doc. She said if I didn't help her, she'd go bug you about it instead."

My visa application was sitting in my lap. My fingers tightened until the paper crinkled.

"You don't have to explain. I don't want to hear it."

"Claire." That long-suffering sigh again, like I was the one being difficult. "What am I gonna do with you? Look, once we're in San Diego, she won't bother us. I swear."

That was the third time he'd promised me that.

A few months ago, hearing him say it would have made my whole week. Now my eyes stung, and I had to press my lips together to keep every question I wanted to scream at him from spilling out.

Don't. Don't embarrass yourself again.

Maybe he was falling for her. Maybe he had been for years, and I was the last one to notice.

"Okay," I said.

A few days later, I got home from my visa appointment, where they'd taken my fingerprints and photo, and found Bella in my bedroom with a tape measure.

She was crouched in front of my desk with one hand on the top drawer.

The drawer with my passport in it.

"Who let you in here?"

It came out so sharp that she flinched.

"Your door was open." She stood up, confused. "God, relax. You're acting like I'm stealing your stuff. Are you still mad about that necklace or something?"

The silver necklace with the little compass pendant. Mason's present for my sweet sixteen. Bella had worn it to a party without asking and snapped the chain. Mason had made her give it back and promised me he'd get it fixed.

That was two years ago.

"Mom said that once we're in San Diego, we're gonna live together," Bella went on. "So I wanted to see if your desk would fit in the moving truck. We could share it!"

My head snapped up. "Who said I'm living with you?"

"I did."

Mason was standing in the doorway, holding a box of maple donuts from the bakery by school. My favorite. He walked in like it was his room too.

"I found a three-bedroom near campus. My parents are covering it. You get a room, I get a room, she gets a room. Once she settles in, she moves into the dorms."

I stared at him. "You want me to live with her?"

He frowned. "It's not like you'd be sharing a room."

Bella twisted the tape measure in her hands. "It's okay, Mason. If Claire doesn't want me there, I'll just do the dorms." She gave a brave little smile. "I've never lived with a stranger before, but I'll probably get used to it."

Mom must have been listening from the hall, because she was in my room two seconds later.

"Dorms? Sweetheart, you still have nightmares. How are you supposed to share a room with someone you don't even know?"

I was shaking. "When I was fifteen and went to that science camp in Michigan for six weeks, nobody worried about me. Nobody even drove me to the bus. She's eighteen. She picked this. She can deal with it."

Mom blinked, like she hadn't expected me to bring that up. Then her face went hard.

"You've always been low-maintenance. Bella isn't like you."

"It's three bedrooms, Claire. Nobody's crowding you. What exactly is your problem?"

Bella's eyes went shiny. She tugged on Mom's sleeve.

"Mom, stop. Claire probably just wants to live alone with Mason. I shouldn't get in their way."

Mom opened her mouth to say more, but Mason nodded at the door. She took Bella out.

The second the door clicked shut, he wrapped his arms around me.

"Babe, don't be mad. She can't do anything on her own. We can't just let her live by herself. If she gets into some kind of mess, guess who ends up fixing it? You."

He rubbed my back. "Just put up with it for a little while. For us. For our future."

"What about me?"

He went still. I looked right into his eyes and asked again.

"What about me, Mason?"

"What do you mean? You've got me." He bent down and kissed my forehead. "You'll always come first. You know that."

Did I?

Something cold settled in my chest. He was already onto the next thing, talking about San Diego. Which streets were closest to the beach. Which apartment had the bigger closet.

Behind me, the top drawer of my desk was still open an inch.

I pushed it shut with my hip.