Chapter 163

Violet’s POV

Theo wanted me to rest after I saw my mom yesterday. It was indeed a very draining experience, but I didn’t want to be coddled because of it.

Thankfully, Auntie pointed out that the best way to fight the unstable magic was to keep practicing using my own. So we still got up and trained with Bennett this morning.

Sharing about my unstable magic with him and Marcy had been hard. Telling family members about it made it feel more real.

But once they agreed not to share with the rest of the family, I felt better. It was good to grow my support system. It was good for me to unlearn my rigid independence.

Two heads are better than one, and all that.

Plus, before Bennett left last night, he gave Theo his phone number. He was trying to whisper, but I could still hear as Bennett told my husband that he would be there for me and him. To call him if he ever wanted to talk.

I was relieved to know my husband had support, too. I didn’t know how I would be coping if it were his life in danger.

Despite all those good feelings yesterday, Bennett came to training this morning with a gentleness that immediately got under my skin. Once I’d had enough of it, I manifested a ping pong paddle and whapped him in the arm with it.

“Ow,” he’d shrieked, “but good use of the loophole.”

I yelled at him to cut it out and stop treating me like a dying woman.

“But you are—”

“Bennett Matthew Bravern Riccarton!” He had blanched when I’d pulled out his full name and that was the end of that.

Now Theo and I were back in the archives, trying to get creative with our searches: changing our wording, looking for tangentially related topics. It wasn’t looking good, though. We were both flipping through our own books when Theo spoke up.

“Did you get a chance to talk to the High Priestess about what your mom said?”

I looked up at my husband. His eyes were trailing along a page, but I could tell he wasn’t doing much skimming. He was trying much too hard to appear calm.

“You mean the hallucination? When my mom kept saying, ‘Leave’?”

He nodded. In the magic climate of Henosis, I could smell the fear on him. Fear for my life – and our child’s.

Part of me was so tempted not to tell him about my conversation with Auntie, but I had already made that mistake, and he’d made his opinion clear: he’d rather be afraid if it meant he had all the information, if it meant he could face life at my side.

“Yes. We have a few theories.”

Still, he didn’t look up from his book, the picture of nonchalance.

“The first is that Mom was telling me to leave Henosis because the extra boost of magic in the atmosphere could be further destabilizing my magic. The second is that,” I swallowed nervously, “she was telling my wolf to leave my body to escape the unstable magic.”

Theo’s entire body tensed, the page between his fingers crinkling from the pressure.

“And the final theory is that it was random and holds no meaning at all.”

My husband finally looked up, his shoulders dropping in defeat. He wasn’t trying to hide his fear anymore. I couldn’t help the apologies in my eyes, but I thought better than to voice them.

Tenderly, he reached across the table for my hand. He brought my fingers to his lips for a kiss. “Thank you for sharing your theories with me, alari.”

I melted into his touch, grateful to have him with me, even for the hard parts. Maybe especially for the hard parts. I slipped my hand out of his to brush my knuckles along his jawline.

When I finally brought my hand back to the table, dropping my gaze back to the useless book in front of me, I needed a change in topic. “How’s your search going?”

“Better.” His uncertain tone conveyed a different answer. I raised a curious eyebrow.

Sighing, he pulled out a notepad I’d seen him scribbling on. “I’ve finally found a few books that mention the fake mate bond, and specifically our version of it. The problem is that when they do mention a way to undo it, which most don’t, they all have a different solution.”

Theo consulted his notepad. “Kill the one who cast the spell, kill the fake mate involved, eat only onions for a week straight, share a kiss between the real mates, and one even suggested that a kiss between the fake mates would undo the spell, which makes no sense to me.”

I stood up, leaning over the table and grabbing Theo by the collar to kiss him on the mouth. When I pulled away, he was a little breathless as he said, “Did you really think that would work?”

“No,” I said as I sat back down and scooted my seat back to where it was originally. “It just seemed like an excellent excuse to kiss my husband.” But, just in case, I prodded at our mate bond in my mind.

It was still strained and tattered like the bands on our foreheads. I didn’t mean to sound as sad as I did when I said, “Guess you can cross that one off the list.”

He gave me a sympathetic smile as he struck a line along the notepad. “It’s crossed off,” his smile turned into a smirk, “but I think we should probably continue trying just in case it works later.”

I laughed and even blushed a little. How was my husband still making me blush? He looked much too pleased at the effect he had on me.

For the sake of my ego, I changed the subject again. “What’s that?” I motioned to a book he had off to the side.

“I found a book on the Bloody War.”

I searched his face at the mention of the war from only a generation ago that had been kept a secret from him. I couldn’t imagine how painful it was for him to realize his father had done such atrocious things to get magic out of our land, even if his opinion of his father was already low.

“I thought I’d read more about it once we’re done researching. Learn more about my family’s legacy.” He grumbled the last part with distaste.

Returning his gaze to me, he looked more curious than disgusted. “You mentioned all your uncles died in this war. Were the women not allowed to fight?”

I folded my hands together and cocked my head to the side. “You find it more likely that they didn’t fight than that they fought and survived?”

His shoulders deflated as he realized his mistake, and I reveled in jabbing at him, smiling at him playfully.

“No, you’re right; they didn’t fight. It wasn’t the way.”

When he furrowed his brows, I explained.

“Our country might have no magic and a long way to go with equal opportunities for females, but we do have magic in our technology. I am one of a handful of female Alphas with their own territories. In comparison, Henosis is still very traditional in a lot of ways.”

I nodded out the window toward the jungle. “Life is simpler here and slower, including with progress. When it comes to gender roles, Henosis still has work to do.”

I shrugged as I thought about it. “It’s not like our country is all bad and Henosis is all good, and it’s not the opposite either. Each place has its value and merit, its strengths and weaknesses.”

Theo took my hand, caressing it with his thumb. “Don’t we all.”