Chapter 2
The rumbling of the subway gradually faded away as I closed my eyes, letting the tide of memories drag me back to that night that changed everything.
Eight years ago, 11 PM, Blackwood Manor was shrouded in silence.
I tiptoed into my bedroom and locked the door behind me. My heart was racing—excited yet terrified. Tonight, Caelius had returned from his business trip, but I knew he was in his study handling work.
Tonight was my eighteenth birthday.
Tonight, I was going to tell him how I felt.
I walked to the deepest part of my closet, fumbling behind a pile of conservative dresses. When my fingers touched the silky fabric, I smiled nervously.
That deep red dress.
Not exactly revealing, but more form-fitting than my usual clothes—it would accentuate my curves. I trembled as I changed into it, turning around in front of the mirror.
The girl in the reflection was beautiful and alluring, no longer that naive little girl.
"Eighteen years old, Evelyn," I whispered to my reflection. "You can do this."
I took out the red wine I had secretly hidden in my nightstand—stolen from the wine cellar to give me courage.
After a few sips, my cheeks began to flush, and courage slowly bubbled up inside me. Riding this wave of bravery, I stood up and headed toward the study.
The study door was slightly ajar, and I could hear the rustling of papers from inside.
I took a deep breath and gently pushed the door open.
"Caelius?"
He looked up, his silver-gray eyes particularly deep under the lamplight. When he saw me, his expression showed surprise.
"Evelyn? Why aren't you sleeping? It's so late."
"Today is my birthday." I walked toward him, the wine making my voice tremble slightly. "My eighteenth birthday."
He set down the documents in his hands, looking at me. "Happy birthday, sweetheart. Tomorrow we can..."
"No." I interrupted him, walking to his desk. "I want to celebrate now."
Caelius's gaze fell on me—the deep red dress, my flushed cheeks, and a certain light in my eyes that had never been there before.
"Evelyn, have you been drinking?"
"Just a little bit." I smiled and moved closer to him. "Come give the eighteen-year-old me a birthday blessing."
"You should go back to your room and rest..."
"I don't want to." I suddenly sat on the edge of his desk, my skirt riding up slightly. "Caelius, do you think I'm beautiful?"
His breathing clearly paused. "Evelyn..."
"Answer me." I tilted my head to look at him, a boldness in my eyes like never before. "Am I still that little girl who needs your protection?"
"You'll always be my little girl." His voice was tense.
"Really?" I slid off the desk and walked up to him. "But what if I don't want to be a little girl anymore?"
The alcohol made me exceptionally brave. I reached out and gently caressed his cheek.
"Evelyn, don't..." He caught my hand but didn't push it away.
"Why not?" I stood on my tiptoes and whispered in his ear. "I've waited so long... waited for you to look at me as more than just 'guardian looking at ward'..."
"You don't know what you're saying."
"I do know." I pulled back slightly to look directly into his eyes. "I know that I love you. I've loved you for a very, very long time."
Those words exploded like a bomb in the room.
Complex emotions flashed through Caelius's eyes—shock, struggle, and... some kind of pain I couldn't understand.
"No, Evelyn. It's just gratitude, not love."
"How do you know?" Tears suddenly welled up in my eyes. "How do you know what's in my heart? All these years I've watched you, thought about you, dreamed about you... That's not gratitude—that's love!"
"I'm your guardian..."
"I'm eighteen!" I practically shouted. "Legally, I'm an adult! I can be responsible for my own feelings!"
Caelius looked at me in silence, the struggle in his eyes becoming more and more obvious.
I moved even closer, almost pressed against his chest. "Tell me you don't feel anything. Tell me that all these years, I've misunderstood every look you've given me."
"Evelyn..." His voice was hoarse.
"If you really don't feel anything, then push me away." I looked up at him. "Push me away now, and I'll go back to my room and pretend nothing happened."
Time seemed to stand still.
Then his hand trembled as it caressed my cheek.
"Damn it..." he cursed under his breath, then suddenly kissed my lips.
It was a desperate kiss, carrying years of suppression and the collapse of restraint. I closed my eyes, savoring this kiss I had dreamed about countless times.
"I love you," I whispered against his lips. "I really love you."
He didn't answer, but kissed me even more passionately. His hands trembled as they caressed my cheek, sliding down to my waist.
"Evelyn... are you sure?" His voice was hoarse, his forehead pressed against mine. "Once we start, there's no turning back."
"I'm sure." I wrapped my arms around his neck, feeling the heat radiating from his body. "I've been waiting for this moment for so long."
He lifted me into his arms and walked over to the sofa in the study. Moonlight streamed through the blinds, casting dappled shadows on our bodies.
His kisses became more scorching, trailing from my lips down to my neck, collarbone, and further down... Each kiss was like fire, igniting sensations I had never experienced before.
"It will hurt," he said, lifting his head to look at me, desire and restraint intertwined in his eyes. "If you're scared, it's still not too late..."
"I'm not afraid." My voice trembled, but my gaze was firm. "I want you."
The dress was slowly removed by his hands, the cool air making me instinctively want to curl up. He noticed and took off his shirt to cover me, then continued kissing every inch of my skin.
"Relax, baby." His fingers gently caressed me, helping me gradually get used to this unfamiliar touch. "Tell me how you feel."
I could only respond with trembling, my body growing warm from nervousness and anticipation. When his fingers explored deeper, I couldn't help but gasp softly.
"Does it hurt?"
"Not... not too much..." I bit my lip, my cheeks burning.
He continued the foreplay even more gently until my body gradually relaxed and became moist. Then he removed the last barrier and positioned himself above me.
"Look at me, Evelyn." He cupped my face. "I want to see you."
I opened my eyes and met his silver-gray gaze. Then, under the witness of moonlight, he slowly entered me.
The tearing pain made me bite my lip involuntarily, tears instantly welling up. His forehead pressed against mine, sweat dripping onto my face.
"Does it hurt? Should we stop?" His voice trembled from restraint.
"Don't stop..." I held his neck tighter, my voice choked. "I want to completely have you."
He kissed away my tears and continued with extremely gentle, slow movements. The pain was gradually replaced by a feeling of fullness as our bodies became completely one.
"I love you, Caelius." I whispered in his ear, feeling his rhythm within me. "I'll love you for the rest of my life."
His movements paused for a moment, then he held me tighter and began moving deeper. But he never said "I love you too."
Pain and pleasure intertwined as I gripped his shoulders tightly, feeling his increasingly rapid breathing and quickening pace. Finally, he groaned low, holding me tight as his whole body trembled, reaching his peak.
Warm liquid flowed into me, and in that moment, I felt we had truly become part of each other.
Afterward, I curled up in his arms, my body sore and exhausted. His arms encircled me, giving me an unprecedented sense of security.
"Sleep, baby." He pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead.
I fell into a deep sleep in his embrace, my dreams filled with sweet fantasies—tomorrow morning's tender conversation, the sweet words he would say to me, the scene of us going public with our relationship...
