Chapter 1

In the middle of the worst fight my husband and I ever had, Damian stared coldly at my stomach.

“Get rid of it.”

He said it as calmly as if he were assessing an inconvenient business matter.

“The timing’s wrong for a baby.”

In that moment, something inside me shattered.

“Okay,” I said, looking right at him.

But he was sure I was bluffing. Sure I loved him too much, down to my bones, to ever gamble with this baby.

Right up until the day he came home with an armful of baby clothes, glowing with the joy of becoming a father—and found out I’d really done it.

That was when he broke.

————

Damian rubbed the bridge of his nose, irritated, exhaustion and impatience written all over his face.

“Ivy, I really don’t have the energy to deal with this baby right now.”

He said it like a perfectly reasonable complaint.

“Your morning sickness is so bad you can’t be left alone. But Lily just broke her leg, and she needs me. Could you try to be a little rational?”

I looked at him, and it felt like someone had shoved a block of ice into my chest. “So because I’m pregnant, I deserve to be left home alone?”

“Then what do you want me to do?” Damian raised his voice. There wasn’t a trace of guilt in his eyes.

He took a deep breath and looked at me coldly. “If you feel so wronged every time I’m with Lily, then forget the baby. Go get rid of it. Now. We can always have another one later.”

In that second, the air went completely still.

He didn’t even lift his eyes when he said it.

He was waiting for me to cry.

Waiting for me to back down and apologize, the way I always had.

He was certain I’d never actually go through with it.

Whatever feeling was left in me went silent the moment he said get rid of it.

“Okay.” I heard my own voice, flat and calm.

Damian stopped short, his brows knotting. “What did you say?”

“I said okay.”

I lifted my head and looked him straight in the eye.

He’d expected me to fall apart like the last few times, to go hysterical the second Lily’s name came up.

But I really had figured it out now.

I didn’t want the baby anymore.

And Damian, I didn’t want you anymore either.

Maybe it was guilt. He stepped forward, took me by the shoulders, and softened his voice. “Ivy, I know you don’t want to lose it. I promise, as soon as Lily’s a little better, I’ll be all yours. Okay?”

I didn’t say anything.

Maybe you’ll have a baby someday. Just not the one I’m carrying.

My silence seemed to unsettle him.

He’d gotten a call earlier and had been about to leave for the hospital to sit with Lily. Instead, he followed me into the bedroom.

“I’m fine. Go be with her.” I lay down calmly.

When I’d gotten upset earlier, my stomach had cramped hard twice, as if in protest.

Now it was eerily quiet. There was only a heavy, dragging ache low in my belly that wouldn’t go away.

Once, I would have grabbed Damian and gone straight to the ER in the middle of the night.

But I knew that if I said it hurt now, he’d only think I was using my body to keep him from going to Lily.

I was tired.

Too tired even to fight.

Damian paused and rubbed the back of his neck. “Forget it. I won’t go tonight. Lily’s probably already asleep—”

Before he could finish, his phone rang.

He glanced at me, hesitating. I didn’t make a sound.

On the third ring, he answered.

“Damian, where are you… a glass broke, I’m bleeding…”

Even without speakerphone, Lily’s voice came through clearly.

Damian’s face changed. He grabbed his coat and headed for the door. “Don’t move! I’m on my way!”

At the doorway, he hesitated and looked back at me.

I’d already closed my eyes.

His gaze lingered on me for a moment. Then the door clicked softly shut.

I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling.

Lily had called him away like this more times than I could count in the last two months.

We’d known each other since high school. Back then, he and Lily were madly in love.

Then Lily went abroad, and he fell apart. I was the one who stayed with him through the darkest stretch of his life.

He really had been a good husband. Gentle. Devoted to our home.

But all of that changed two months ago, when Lily came back.

A month ago, I found out I was pregnant. The morning sickness was brutal.

Damian stayed with me for two days. After that, he was called away again and again.

Until yesterday, when he didn’t come home at all.

I called him more than a dozen times. Lily was the one who finally picked up.

She said, “Damian’s asleep. Did you need something?”

When he came home today, we had the worst fight of our lives.

And he coldly threw out those words: get rid of it.

In that moment, I suddenly understood. He didn’t love me anymore.

I took a deep breath, picked up my phone, opened the clinic’s booking page, and scheduled the procedure for the next afternoon.