Chapter 193

Matt

I held onto Celeste’s hand, leaning heavily on the two crutches I had propped under my opposite arm. A feeling of intense déjà vu swept through me as I watched Seth step forward and light the pyre. Around us, others did the same until dark smoke rose into the blue spring sky. I hoped this was the last funeral I ever had to go to, at least for a long while.

Celeste had a blank expression on her face that worried me more than anything. Beside her, Jack and Fiona stood holding hands. Fiona was crying, and Jack had a stricken look on his face. As one, he and Celeste let go of our hands and stepped forward. They lit the last pyre.

“Goodbye dad,” Celeste said, just loud enough for me to hear. My heart squeezed.

Jack didn’t speak, he just lowered his gaze and stepped back beside Fiona. She immediately took his hand, but he didn’t look up from his shoes. I understood the warring emotions he was feeling. He hated his father for abandoning him, and he felt guilty that he got killed right in front of him.

Celeste took my hand. She, on the other hand, just stared ahead without really seeing anything. She looked shell-shocked, and I couldn’t blame her. She just needed time and space, but I couldn’t stop the feeling of helplessness that rushed through me. I didn’t know how to help her. I didn’t even really know how to offer her comfort.

She deserved to be happy and to have a normal life. None of us really knew what ‘normal’ was anymore. Not even me. But I still had hope that we’d figure it out somehow, together. I just didn’t want to lose her.

I stayed with Celeste until the pyre collapsed into a pile of ashes. Then the four of us turned and headed back toward town. Thankfully, the garage where I’d stashed my car hadn’t collapsed in the fight, and we had enough gas to at least make it back home tonight.

It felt odd to go home. It had been so long since any of us were there, especially Celeste. When we left, I was still reeling over what I did to Sabrina. Celeste was going with me for one weekend, and then we were supposed to come back. Instead, Celeste became a wolf, and we fought a war. It was almost too much to wrap my head around.

We weren’t the same people we were when we left. I didn’t know what we were going to do from here. We couldn’t exactly slide right back into our old lives, could we? Too much had happened. Too much had changed.

We piled into my car. Fiona offered to drive since my leg still made it difficult for me to do most of the things I normally could. Jack offered too, but we all knew his shoulder had been bothering him even more since the fight, so we all refused. Celeste didn’t have a license, so that just left Fiona. Luckily, she was a very steady driver.

Jack sat in the front with her so Celeste and I could sit together. My crutches were propped up against the seat on the far side, Celeste opting to be in the middle so we could sit shoulder-to-shoulder. The moment we sat down, she leaned her head on my shoulder, closing her eyes.

We drove in silence for the first little while, Celeste drifting in and out of sleep. She didn’t wake fully until we pulled into a gas station. Jack got out to pump the gas and the rest of us went inside to the bathroom. It took some awkward hobbling, but I managed to get around fine enough on my crutches.

Fiona and Celeste grabbed us some snacks and energy drinks, and then we were back in the car. It was only another hour before we got back home.

“You guys should stay with us tonight,” Jack said. “Longer even, if you want.”

Fiona changed lanes after checking over her shoulder, her gaze focused. Trees streamed past the car–most of them already covered in buds. Spring was fully upon us.

I glanced at Celeste, and she nodded. “Alright,” I said.

Fiona just shrugged. “Sounds good to me. I don’t really want to have to explain to my roommate where I’ve been. Not tonight, at least.”

“Where does she think you are?” Jack asked.

“I told her I was visiting my sick grandma,” she answered, shooting him a sheepish look. “I don’t even have a grandma. They both died before I was born.”

Beside me, Celeste snorted. “Oh my God, Fiona.” The twinge of hilarity in her tone lifted my spirits instantly.

Fiona smiled. “It was the only thing I could think of. Better than radio silence.” She shot Jack a look as she said it, and he sunk into his seat a little. The sight of it almost made me laugh, and then Celeste was giggling beside me. Suddenly, the four of us were laughing. It was slightly hysterical, but it was much needed.

We had a lot of adjusting to do when we got home, but at least we had each other.

“Stay for a few days,” Celeste said, turning to me once the laughter had died down.

“Okay,” I answered easily. “I’m going to have to get my stuff out of my dorm room somehow, anyway. I doubt I’m considered a student anymore.”

“Ditto,” Fiona said.

“Yeah, I think we all may need to repeat a semester,” Jack drawled.

We all broke into laughter again. It was a fragile thing, but I was willing to hold on to it. We all had a lot to work through, but that didn’t mean we should succumb to darkness. I’d been down that road before, and it was hard to climb out of. The last war wrecked me. I didn’t want to go down that path again. Especially now that I had someone relying on me. Celeste needed me to be strong.

I put my arm around her, and she leaned into me.

When the town finally came into view, we all sat forward. Fiona navigated down familiar streets. The main strip was packed with university students getting out of their classes. Some heads turned as they recognized my car, but we just kept driving until the campus faded behind us.

“This is so weird,” Celeste said.

“Yeah, super weird,” Fiona agreed. “They just have no idea what’s really out there. Do they?”

“They’re better off,” Jack mumbled. “Trust me.”

“I’d have to second that,” I said.

“Do you think it’s possible to go back to normal?” Celeste asked, her voice barely perceptible. It was clear we were all thinking the same thing.

“None of us have ever been normal,” Jack said before I could. Fiona shot him a look. “Well, most of us have never been normal,” he amended, glancing at her with a small smile on his face. “I don’t think that’s such a bad thing.”

“You don’t?” Celeste asked. We all knew what she was really asking.

Jack swiveled around in his chair to look at her. “I guess I’m on team wolf now,” he said earnestly. “Who knew?”

Celeste grinned. “We all did.”

He rolled his eyes and turned back around. “Whatever,” he mumbled.

Something warm settled in my chest, and I kissed the side of Celeste’s head. We were finally home. We’d figure the rest of it out later.