Chapter 3 Understanding

Hope

I felt a pair of strong arms pick me up but I couldn't stop crying long enough to see who it was. I was set in a lap and those arms just wrapped around me while I cried. Eventually I got control of myself and blinked up at the face of my grandfather. He had a look of concern and question on his face. No doubt he’d seen Rogan go back to the facility and wondered why he now found me on the ground crying. 

I hadn’t shared with any of my parents or David about what I had discovered. I thought about it a few times, but I thought it would cause problems. He’s a student here at the facility, and I don’t want them to treat him differently, or worry about any of this crap. Not to mention that they would have encouraged us to be together and that wasn’t a thing that was ever going to happen.

The day I felt the mate bond and heard my dragon call him our mate he was kissing her up against the wall in the hallway outside of the guest rooms. My dragon was trying to surge and go take her out or something, but I managed to hang onto her by the skin of my teeth, and then I retreated to my room. I waited a whole day, begging off training, and then the next time I saw them they were all over each other once again. I watched and waited, and then he said he was in love with her to my brothers and me one afternoon. Then I was sure, this was going to be the way it all went down. 

“Do you want to talk to me about what is going on?” He asked me softly.

“Rogan is my mate, but he’s madly in love with Melissa, so he rejected me and I accepted it so he could go and be happy with the woman he is head over heels in love with.” I hicupped and I hoped I didn’t sound pathetic. 

He closed his eyes and shook his head, then tilted it back for a moment, then he hugged me closer, and bent his head down and kissed my forehead, “How long have you known Hope?”

“For almost a year and a half. The day I found out I saw him kissing her. I had to get out of there. About two weeks later he told Dillion, Jeremy, and me that he was totally in love with her and he was going to ask her to be his mate when they were both eighteen. So, then I knew this was not going to be the hearts and flowers everyone thinks it should be. I decided I wanted him to be happy, and if I am not his happy, then he should go be happy with her. Besides, if I pushed it and he did choose me, he would just probably resent me later and regret he had chosen me because of some bond instead of following his heart. So, why set myself up for that.” I tried to shrug.

He just looked at me for a few moments and then he sighed, “I don’t know what to say Hope. Part of me is incredibly proud of you and how you handled this whole thing, because you’re right, manufactured happiness isn’t real happiness. The other part of me wants to go kick his ass for breaking your heart.” 

I kind of smiled, “That’s actually why I haven’t talked to any of you about it. Brand knows because he could feel the feelings coming off of me unfortunately no matter how hard I was trying to hide it.” 

“We need to talk to your mother, and I’m not sure how all of this will play out. Did Dillion and Jeremy find out you guys were mates?” I nodded.

“Well, I hope they are not pissed that he chose her over you then, because that could get messy as they are like best friends.” I nodded. 

“Yeah, I should go and talk to them, make sure they understand that I’m going to be okay, and I already was prepared for this, well, I guess as prepared as I could be.” I wipe another rogue tear. 

“Okay, well go take care of that, and no doubt I will see you running the course later. If you need me you know where I am. I think we should let your mom know what’s up, because you know sooner or later the rumors will start as your brothers will talk to him and someone is going to overhear what is happening. Nothing stays secret around here.” I nodded. 

We both got up and I dusted my pants off. I hugged him again and then went to the facility and back into the main room where we had exited to the student dining room where I had first laid eyes on him this morning. I heard a bunch of voices, and a couple sounded not so happy and I was worried that there were already problems. So, without hesitation I went into the room and went to go and find something to eat. I wouldn’t actually be able to eat it but I wanted to act like everything was normal.  

When I sat down with my plate he looked up at me and I could still see some of the strain on his face. He got up, nodded slightly and left. I turned and looked at Dillion and Jeremy, and they had hard looks on their faces.

“It’s fine guys. Don’t lose a good friendship over this shit. It happens, and it is what it is. He’s happy, so let him be happy. I don’t want to be someone’s second choice anyway, so there’s that. I’m fine.” I heard them both sigh really hard and then they both got up and walked out, messing up my hair on the way by. 

Once they were gone and I was alone, I took my food and went and threw it away knowing I would never be able to eat it right now. Then I went to my room, and washed my face yet again. Fixed my hair from where my brothers had messed it up. Then I went to go and find where Sarah was. No doubt she’d be hunting me down to tell me happy birthday, and I hated when she did that in front of people, because she was so dramatic with everything she did, and I wasn't. So, if she had her way she’d embarrass the hell out of me. Such was the life of a sister. 

I would have to find my way through this one way or another.