Chapter 45

Viviane

This must be what flying feels like.

My entire body is trembling and quaking, lost in ecstasy, drowning in a sea of pleasure. I can hear myself crying out, and feel Caspian anchoring me through the storm. His fingers are still moving, petting me with slow, gentle strokes meant to bring me back down to earth. But I don’t want to come down – not yet.

I’ve never felt anything like it. I’ve touched myself like any other curious teenager, but I ‘ve never gotten very far. Every time I’ve either felt too embarrassed and awkward, or too guilty – as if I was doing something wrong. But nothing about this feels wrong. This feels very, very right.

Caspian’s lips are moving against my ear, and his deep voice breaks through my euphoric fog. He’s praising me, telling me how beautiful I look coming to pieces for him, saying what a good girl I am for telling him what I need.

Warmth fills me as he kisses me back to reality. I open my eyes, overflowing with love for this hard, harsh wolf. When I met Caspian I thought he was nothing but trouble: brutal and callous, aggressive and completely self-centered. Now the idea makes me want to laugh. He may be capable of incredible brutality, but I never had anything to fear. He’s so gentle with me, so protective.

Caspian smooths back my soaked hair, his blue eyes glinting. “Are you ready for more?”

I chance a peek at the hard member trapped between our bodies, and instantly regret it. My eyes practically jump out of my head, and my cheeks immediately flush with color. Caspian chuckles, catching my chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilting my gaze back up. “Yes or no, kitten.” He purrs, “We’ve officially reached the point of no return.”

I’m nodding before I can even process the words, not that it would have made a difference. I need to take this step with Caspian, I need to share this intimacy with him, and Gods help me, I need to come again.

I could almost cry. For a long time after Mordred raped me, I didn’t understood how anyone could get pleasure out of sex. It wasn’t just the violation, it was the pain – like being torn apart from the inside out. Yet now my body is consumed by this hollow ache, by the need to be filled even though it doesn’t seem possible the battering ram before me could cause anything but pain. Next to Caspian Mordred was as big as a toothpick.

As soon as I give permission, I can see the shift in my mate. I realize how severely he was holding himself back. He lifts me out of the tub, carrying me into the bedroom without stopping to dry off. One moment I’m in his arms, the next I’m bouncing on the coverlet with a surprised little yelp. By the time I stop moving, Caspian is already crawling towards me, seeming more animal than man.

My legs are sprawled, and before I know what he intends, he buries his face between them. “Oh! Caspian, what are you–” I squeal, trying to back away but his arms hook around my thighs and he pulls me back.

His icy eyes glow with carnal hunger as he drags his tongue up my center, watching my face and chuckling darkly when I arch off the mattress. I can’t believe what he’s doing, I’ve never heard of such a thing. I stop questioning – hell I stop thinking – when he sucks my clit into his mouth.

I’m moaning and crying out as he feasts on me, driving me to another orgasm so quickly I’m reeling. Why I’m still caught in the throws of rapture, he spears one long, thick finger into me. Yes I think deliriously, feeling stretched in the most delicious way, this is what I need.

Caspian hisses as he begins to pump the digit into my soaked channel, though I’m not sure why. A second finger joins the first a few moments later, and a small twinge of pain flashes before glorious returns. His tongue flicks my sensitive clit as his fingers scissor inside me, stretching my tight sheath in between thrusts.

An anxious whimper bursts out of me when I feel him trying to add a third finger, and Caspian raises his head. “Shhh kitten,” he croons, pressing tender kisses to the insides of my thighs, “‘Trust me you’ll be glad of this in a few minutes.”

He’s trying to stretch me out, I realize, trying to prepare me for his cock. I drop my head back down to the bed with a pitiful humph, and Caspian returns to laving my swollen flesh. His fingers – all three of them – slide into my heat. Pleasure and pain entwine, but it’s a good hurt, and then Caspian crooks his fingers inside me, rubbing a spot that floods me with so much raw pleasure that I forget all about the pain.

I’m on the brink of another climax, my hips rocking shamelessly into Caspians mouth and hands. It breaks over me so suddenly my vision blacks out, and I don’t even realize something much larger than my mate’s fingers is pressing at my entrance.

I cry out as he enters me, the sound strangling in my throat when he becomes lodged halfway inside me. My muscles spasm, fighting to accommodate him as my back arches away from the bed. He buries his head in my neck with a guttural swear. ‘Fuck, Viviane.’

Still riding out my orgasm, my channel pulses and squeezes around him, and my mind can’t figure out which sensation to focus on.

Caspian is rocking into me, edging deeper and deeper despite the fact that I can already feel him in my throat. He snakes his arm beneath me, tilting my hips up. I whine as he slides deeper, and Caspian draws my mouth to his. ‘I know, baby, we’re almost there.’ He promises against my lips. He retreats and thrusts again, this time driving his full length into me.

My breath catches in my chest, depriving my lungs of oxygen for a few precious moments. “Liar,” I choke.

Caspian emits a low, rumbling laugh, “Shhh, just relax.’ He coaxes, dragging his lips across my flushed skin. His arms are shaking as he holds himself still inside me, letting me adjust. ‘That’s it.’ He praises when my internal stranglehold finally loosens.

As soon as he begins to withdraw, my overwhelmed body forgets all about the ache his intrusion is causing. I feel suddenly empty when he pulls out, and I hate it. I need him back inside me, I need us to be one.

I don’t have to wait long. Caspian thrusts back inside, slowly to start, then more and more powerfully. At first I’m trying to meet him thrust for thrust, but before long I’m writhing beneath him, completely lost in sensation and incapable of doing anything more than hanging on for the ride.

I glance down at the point where our bodies connect, fascinated and horrified by the sight of his huge staff plunging into my small body. I don’t understand why, but the image of him impaling me drives my excitement higher, and I dig my heels into his back, needing more.

Caspian’s hands are everywhere. His mouth is everywhere… and then it’s not. Then it’s glued to the point where my neck and shoulder meet, kissing and nibbling, a low growl rumbling in his chest as he pounds into me.

The mark. I’d almost forgotten about the mark. When he told me about it I was frightened, but now I need it more than I need oxygen. I tilt my head to the side, offering myself up to him like a lamb for the slaughter.

I’m not sure if he realizes it, but I can hear his voice in my head, chanting mine over and over again. I’ve never heard a sweeter word, and I send my own affirmation back: yours, yours, yours.

Caspian groans, reaching between our bodies to rub my clit, and I’m so oversensitized that’s all it takes. We spiral into oblivion together, his strokes becoming near violent until he slams home one final time, spilling inside me with a savage growl. At the same moment I teeter over the edge, Caspian sinks his fangs into my skin, catapulting me into the stratosphere.

I can’t explain what happened then. My eyes were closed until I felt a jolt of electricity deep in my chest. I opened my eyes and I swear a beam of golden light was connecting my heart to Caspian’s. His fangs were still in my throat, his hips still thrusting, so I simply stared in wonder.

And then I felt it; like a lock clicking into place. The light faded, but the link between us remained. Our mating bond sealed, filling me with joy and love, making me feel whole in a way I never have before. For the first time in my life, I didn’t feel broken or lacking, I didn’t feel weak.

It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever experienced, and I kept waiting for the bliss to fade, but it remained long after our lovemaking ceased.

In the delirious aftermath, Caspian flipped our bodies, settling me on top of him and petting me like a sleepy kitten. “How do you feel?” He asked, voice full of pride.

“Perfect.” Words I’ve never said in my entire life. “I feel perfect.”