Chapter 45

“Sorry about that,” I murmur as my hand finds my chest. I’m breathing heavily, and I’m starting to worry I’m going to have a full-blown panic attack.

Derek puts his hand on my arm, looking down into my eyes. “Nothing to be sorry about, Esme.”

“He was following me and came here to antagonize me. The girls…” I abruptly stop talking.

“What?”

“The girls,” I emphasize, quickly running toward their room.

“Going to need a bit more information?”

“The girls were with me when he was at the door. I told them to hide!”

As we turn in the doorway, Bea and Tris are coming out of hiding under one of the beds. A huge wave of relief slithers through me. “Thank God.”

“Are you two okay?” Derek asks as he gets on his knees to hug his daughters.

“Is that man gone?” Tris whimpers, her bottom lip popping out in fear.

As Derek holds them, I feel a deep guilt. I’m the reason that they feel so scared in their own home.

“The mean man is gone,” I assure the two girls.

Derek’s face turns toward me while still holding his girls. “He might not stay away.”

“Derek, I’m sorry; I shouldn’t have come over and put the girls in danger.”

My boss lets go of his daughters and sighs, staying on the carpeted ground to be at closer heights. “You protected my girls. You are clearly shaken up by everything going on and aren’t in any position to continue apologizing.”

“Did he hurt you, Miss Esme?” Bea questions, tears stained on his pretty face as she watches me from below.

“No, Bea, I’m okay.”

“Why did he come here and attack you, then?” She pushes.

“That man is very unkind to me.” It would be so much easier if I could give them all the details. But they’re just too young. “He still wants to be in charge of my life.”

Tris takes her thumb to her mouth, biting at her nail and trying to keep herself from crying anymore. She’s so young and so used to this kind of trauma that I wonder just how messed up she might be in just a few years.

I lean down, hands resting on my thighs as I look into Tris’ sad, brown eyes. She rubs her eye, clearly still trying not to cry.

I take the toddler’s face in with one of my hands. As someone so small, my adult hands always seem to miraculously grow when I need to keep someone safe.

Let alone a child.

“My ex wants to take my money away and be married to another woman. But the only thing that matters to me is that you’re safe now, okay?”

“Is he coming back?” Tris asks through her tears.

“He shouldn’t, honestly, Tris. I signed a piece of paper keeping him far away, but he doesn’t care about the law.”

Bea pipes up. “A restraining order? Why doesn’t it work?”

Derek seems to resign that he’ll never get the three of us off the subject, he lets himself fall to the ground on his butt. “The law states that if you don’t feel safe and need to file a report, there’s a possibility of him being sent to jail for breaking the promise.”

Tris sniffs. “So, he broke his permission?” The two girls seem very concerned, and I’m running out of ideas of what to tell them that won’t scar them for life.

“He just likes to bully me, I guess,” I sigh and shrug simultaneously.

Derek’s eyes go soft as he watches me, and I can practically hear the sound of my own pounding heart. “Esme, you don’t have to live in fear of that monster.”

I sniff now; the panic, fear, and uncertainty of the future is absolutely crushing me. “I don’t…I don’t think I can trust him.”

An eyebrow raise. “Well, what do you think?”

I look around the room, feeling the tears well up inside of me as they finally leak down my cheeks and all over myself.

“I don’t know if I can…trust anyone?” I ask, like he’ll know how to solve it.

Derek clearly doesn’t get the point, though, doing so much as to stand back up slowly away from his girls.

“You don’t trust me?” Derek’s voice cuts me deep, because he’s hurt by this, I know it.

“No,” I cough. “You’re probably one of the only men who I do trust.”

He can’t stop himself, and the man lets one crack of a smile slip through. He’s clearly proud to be that person in my life.

But does that mean anything will change?

“I lied to my lawyer,” I say. It’s so fast that for just a second, I question whether or not I actually said it or just imagined it.

“What did you lie about?” He takes another step forward to give me some assurance.

I look at the girls and then back at my boss, wanting this conversation to happen away from their ears.

Seemingly understanding my fears, Derek nods. Then, to his daughters, he says, “Girls, I’m going to go talk with Miss Esme. You stay in here and play with some toys, okay? It won’t take long.”

The girls don’t even say a word. They nod their small heads, and Bea takes Tris over to their toys.

Derek gestures with his head toward the door. “Come on.”

Once I have some water and Derek and I are sitting on his sleek, fancy couch, I admit everything. “He is absolutely falling in love with me and doesn’t seem to understand. I hold no romantic feelings for him. I mean, he’s doing his job and protecting me where he must, but at the same time, it’s making me stress out even more!”

“Hence why you don’t trust any men. You think they’ll help you for their own personal gain.”

I look up at him through my lashes. I’m not used to anyone knowing me this well. Annie and Lily are the best, but even they haven’t always known what to say.

“I just don’t feel…safe?” I start playing with my necklace from the day I got the promotion and lost Ryan. My eyes wander the room looking for the right thing to say to him. “I just don’t want your daughters to be involved when none of this is meant for them.”

“Esme,” he states slowly. “My kids love spending time with you. I’m sure they’re just as scared for you right now.”

“They don’t deserve to deal with my problems as if already fully grown.”

He snorts, covering his mouth. “Bea and Tris hate everyone. But clearly, not you. And, if you can continue to trust me, I’ll do whatever it is needed to keep you safe.”

“But why?” I ponder aloud.

“Because that’s what I do best. Protect people from whatever it is they need protecting from.”

My heart swells with his words, wanting to hug him, kiss him, or even both. “Are you sure?”

“I wouldn’t be making any promises if I didn’t believe I couldn’t fulfill them.”

“But Ryan is avoiding the restraining order.”

“If there’s a next time, we’ll have to get the police here. Do you have a signed copy of your paperwork?”

“I do.”

“Then keep that nearby. Yes, if he is never served with the order, we’ll at least have a date and an explanation. If anything, I can have him arrested for trespassing on private property.”

I turn my head. “Will that work?”

“Worth a shot. Man like that clearly doesn’t think rules apply to him. I’ll let him see that he’s not untouchable.”

Nodding, I let a breath out. I didn’t even realize I’ve been holding my breath this entire conversation. I let my body sort of crumble onto the sofa. This is all getting to be so overwhelming.

I thought my biggest problem of the day was going to be Daniel. But instead, Ryan has decided to take the lead.

“Miss Esme!” The two girls come out of their room, Bea looking excited.

“Bea!” I throw back, making her laugh.

“Will you come to our talent show?”

I look at their father.

“Their school is doing it. Talent show. Let the little kids shine bright, right?”

I look down at the two balls of energy. “Can you tell me what you’ll be doing for the show?”

“Sing!” Tris giggles and claps her hands. “Disney songs!”

“Multiple songs?” I wonder, checking Derek’s face in the corner of my eyes.

“They haven’t picked which one to stick with,” he admits, sheepishly. “From Frozen to Tangled, to Moana and Cinderella.”

“Well, they are your little princesses, after all,” I tease with a tiny wink at my boss.

“Will you come?” Tris asks, pouting again.

Derek is nodding his approval. As much as I don’t need it, I don’t want to stop on his toes or be in his way. So, returning my gaze to his daughters, I put on the biggest smile I can muster, happy the tears have now disappeared.

“I would love to come to your show.”