Chapter 203

I put my feet back on the pedals and give one last push. I make it one rotation before I stop again.

Neil’s hands come down on the top of both handlebars. “Stop, Chloe. Before you hurt yourself worse.”

I narrow my eyes at him, but even I can recognize he’s right this time. Another setback would be worse than the current status quo. I refuse to tell him that. In fact, the silent treatment seems like a pretty good option right about now.

I lift my chin as high as I can. I’m going for defiant but I suspect I look something like an affronted spoiled child.

Neil studies that expression, then my arms as I cross them.

“Something bothering you?” he asks me.

“Other than the obvious?” I wave to the bike.

“Other than your obvious frustration with your slow recovery time, yes,” Neil says.

I could tell him no. I could make a scene and storm out. But then I really would be that affronted spoiled child. Besides, I am tired of holding it back. I don’t want to be mad anymore, especially not with only 4 days left to spend with Neil and the others.

What I want are explanations, and answers, and good memories I can carry with me long after these 4 short days are done.

So I swallow down my natural inclination to argue and be stubborn, and I say, “I heard you and Angela arguing yesterday.”

Finally Neil’s disappointment cracks, just to show the surprise on his face. “You didn’t say anything…”

“I was down the hall. I disappeared before you two could notice me. But your conversation was loud enough that I heard all the gory details.”

Neil nods. “We shouldn’t have been talking about you behind your back.”

I agree. And then I wait for the rest. But he’s not giving anything else up. When it fully dawns on me that this is all he’s planning on saying, I prompt, “That’s it?”

He seems even more surprised than before. “Yeah? I don’t understand why you are upset.”

He doesn’t? How could he not!

“You said you wanted me to leave,” I say, although it’s difficult to remember now, through the hurt.

“I never said that,” Neil corrects at once. “I said I wouldn’t keep you here.”

“Same difference!”

Neil shakes his head. “Chloe. You’ve always wanted out of your contract. I’m simply trying to respect your wishes. You’ve made clear you don’t want to stay a nanny.”

Yeah, Archer said something like that too. They must have talked about it maybe, or were all on the same wavelength.

Neil watches me closer now. He leans forward a little over the handlebars. “Chloe. Do you want to stay?”

And there it is. The question I’ve been avoiding. The one that I haven’t allowed myself to think about because it always seemed so impossible. What use is wasting time considering impossible things?

Yet here Neil is, asking me plain as day what I want.

And I know the answer just as plainly, though I’ve buried down deep.

Yes. I want to stay. Despite everything, I like taking care of Mia and spending time with the brothers, as frustrating as they all are. I’ve grown accustomed to the fluffy bed and the fridge that’s always filled.

The bullying has let up since I first started. This thing we do instead… this… intimacy has been… enjoyable, to say the least.

I’d rather not give any of it up, even though I always knew none of it was meant to last.

Yet. Even though my answer is yes, I want to stay, I know I can’t. I simply cannot allow myself to stay on as a nanny. I wouldn’t mind just helping out, but my future is bigger than that. While I’m here, a nanny is all I’ve ever been. I doubt even Neil would let me stay on as just a roommate.

“We can extend your contract if that is your wish,” Neil says, confirming my suspicions. He gives me a small, supportive smile. He genuinely thinks he’s giving me an agreeable solution. “We’ll keep you on longer as a nanny. We can that, Chloe. No one can stop us.”

Despite everything, I am tempted. This place feels like a dream sometimes, and I don’t always want to wake up.

But, there are many reasons for me to refuse. My dreams are only one of the items on that list. Another is silver right there in Neil’s shoulder. I look at where I know it to be. Instinctively, he lifts a hand and rubs at it. Then he notices what he’s doing and stops.

“I have to leave,” I say, though I hate saying it. “For both of our sakes.”

“Chloe. Surely your life here wasn’t so bad that you would give it all up for the sake of following such a foolish, impossible dream.”

And this, Neil and other brothers’ disbelief and lack of support. This is another reason why I have to leave. And it’s the one that tells me I’m making the right choice.

“I will never give up my dream, Neil.”

I’m feeling a bit better by now. The healing factor is finally starting to kick in somewhat. So I hope of the bike. I grab my towel off the handlebar and dab off the sweat on my brow and my neck.

I don’t notice right away that Neil is carefully tracking each movement.

“Chloe,” Neil says. His voice is deep.

I don’t want to argue anymore, but I will.

“You guys have never believed in my dream,” I say. I can’t help myself from getting a bit huffy now. “But I’m telling you.” I point my finger at him. “I will become a warrior.”

I turn from him and start to walk away, when I’m abruptly stopped by a hand on the corner of my neck and shoulder. It’s not grabby, but more steady and firm, unyielding.

In a flash, I’m pressed up against the metal support of the pull-up bars. Neil’s hand slides around to the base of my throat. He doesn’t have to push to keep me right where I am. It’s like my body’s natural response to the presence of his hand.

His Alpha pheromones must be on blast. He smells so good.

We’ve been intimate since his silver poisoning, but not like this. I press my thighs together, embarrassed by how quickly this positon turns me on. I love when he gets all authoritative and growly. I love it more watching him trying to keep it together and failing.

A small whimper escapes me. I need this. Need him.

He tilts his head back so that he looks down the bridge of his nose at me. Gods, if anyone but him gave me this look, I’d likely slug them. But with Neil, knowing how tough and capable and supportive he is, it lights me like a fucking rocket.

“Neil…” My whimper has become a full on moan now. I don’t care. He’s so fucking hot. And the promise of whatever is about to come is making me burn.

“Now,” Neil says, and it’s his deep, growly, Alpha tone. “Behave.”