Chapter 4 4

Venessa’s POV

I finished my work in the garden, brushing soil from my fingers as I noticed the Gamma’s gaze lingering on me longer than necessary. His attention didn’t go unnoticed by Denzel either. The faint pulse of irritation I felt through our half-bond told me everything I needed to know. He didn’t like it. Still, I pretended not to notice.

“See me in my office, Venessa. In two hours.”

His voice echoed through my mind, firm and commanding. I didn’t know what to expect from him, but this was different unexpected. Regardless, I kept my focus. I couldn’t afford to forget my mission.

“Okay, Alpha,” I replied through the link before turning away.

The moment I closed the door to my room, I exhaled, long and shaky. My chest rose and fell as I tried to steady myself. The air outside had been thick with tension, and the way Denzel reacted it rattled me. He’d been upset. The way his men had looked at me bothered him, but I couldn’t tell if his anger was directed at them… or at me.

I hadn’t done anything wrong. He had a wife, a Luna. By all logic, I should have been searching for a second-chance mate instead of being caught in this tangled web of emotions and memories. But here he was protective, possessive, conflicted.

“We need to stay focused, Venessa,” Nyla’s voice whispered through my mind.

“I know,” I murmured back.

I was done for the day, so I lay down to rest, exhaustion washing over me. The moment my eyes closed, a searing pain tore through my chest. It was sudden, blinding so sharp it stole the air from my lungs. I bit my lip hard, refusing to scream. Tears streamed freely down my face.

They say crying relieves pain, but this wasn’t the kind of pain tears could ease. I knew exactly what it was. I had felt it before, too many times to count.

Denzel was with her.

The bond fragile and incomplete was reacting to it. The connection that refused to die was punishing me for what it couldn’t have.

I curled into myself, clutching my chest as the agony rolled through me in relentless waves. It lasted thirty minutes thirty long, torturous minutes before it began to fade, leaving behind a dull ache and a pounding headache. My limbs trembled from the effort of enduring it.

I glanced at the clock. It was almost time to meet him.

Dragging myself out of bed, I splashed cold water on my face in the small bathroom. My reflection stared back at me eyes swollen, skin pale. I couldn’t let him see that I’d been crying. I wouldn’t give him that. So, I fixed my hair, changed into a clean blouse, and straightened my shoulders before leaving for his office.

I knocked softly.

“Enter,” came his deep voice from within.

The moment I stepped inside, the scent hit me. The air was thick with the unmistakable musk of sex, and his hair was a tousled mess. My stomach twisted not out of jealousy, but because of the cruel bond that made me feel everything I shouldn’t.

“Good evening, Alpha,” I greeted evenly.

He looked up, expression unreadable. I matched it cold, detached. Two could play that game.

“When you rejected me,” he began, voice low and controlled, “did you mean it? Truly?”

I nodded without hesitation. “With all my heart.”

His frown deepened. “Then why are we still bonded?”

I had no answer. I’d wondered the same thing every night.

“Maybe,” I said carefully, “you should reject me too instead of just accepting mine. It might help.”

“I doubt it,” he replied, though I saw uncertainty flicker in his eyes.

“What do we do, then?” I asked softly.

He sighed, leaning back in his chair. “I can’t be with you, Venessa. I have a wife. I have obligations to her and”

“I know,” I interrupted gently. “I felt it. I understand. I’ll manage.”

He looked at me then surprised, maybe even guilty. He didn’t need to know the truth: that I only had one year left, that I’d returned for a purpose to expose Jalisa and her treachery, to stop the death and ruin she’d caused. Once that was done, I would leave. If enduring the pain of this half-bond was the price I had to pay to finish what I started, then I would bear it.

“I’ll… try to find a way to sever it completely,” he said after a pause.

I almost smiled. He had said those exact words before. In another life. And, just like then, he wouldn’t find an answer. No one ever had. But I couldn’t tell him that. So I simply nodded in silence.

“How are you settling in?” he asked after a moment.

“I can’t complain, Alpha. I’m grateful to you and to her highness for your kindness.”

He studied me for a long while. Conflict burned behind his eyes desire, restraint, frustration. I knew that if he hadn’t been bound to Jalisa, he would have honored our bond. But he was loyal, faithful to a fault. And Jalisa had repaid that loyalty with deceit.

“You’re dismissed,” he said finally.

I bowed and turned to leave, refusing to look back.

Once outside, the tears came. Not from weakness, but from the quiet ache that came with caring for someone you could never have. I had tried to be numb. I told myself I didn’t feel anything. But no one ever truly stops feeling not when it comes to their mate.

I went back to my room and skipped dinner. My duties were limited to breakfast service anyway, so I had the rest of the night to myself. The room was warm and airless, so I opened the small window to let in the night breeze. It brushed against my skin, cool and comforting.

I lay on the bed, trying to empty my mind, but the past crept in memories of betrayal, blood, and heartbreak. Jalisa and Tyrell had destroyed everything once. I would not let them do it again.

“It would have been nice to have him as our mate in this life,” Nyla whispered softly.

I didn’t answer. The lump in my throat was too heavy.

My mother used to tell me stories about love about the beauty of the mate bond. She’d spoken of it with such warmth and hope before exile stole her happiness. I grew up yearning for the same kind of love she described. I fantasized about it. Believed in it.

I never imagined it would lead to my death.

Everything I had dreamed of about the mate bond turned into my worst nightmare. And now, to be forced to relive it all again it felt like fate’s cruelest joke.

Tears slipped down my cheeks as I stared into the darkness. I had promised myself I wouldn’t feel this time. That I wouldn’t let emotion consume me again.

What a lie that turned out to be.