Chapter 4 The Ghost Between Them

I sat on my bed that night, still thinking about what Mom said. Someone special coming this weekend. At first I figured it was probably one of her sisters, like Aunt Lisa or something. She always gets extra happy when family visits. But the way she was glowing and smiling? That felt like way too much excitement for just a relative. It was kinda weird. Still, I didn’t let myself wonder about it too hard. Nursing exams were coming up fast and my brain was already a mess.

The next morning Mom woke me up super early, banging on my door with way too much energy. “Amelia! Let’s do that morning hike like we used to. The trail’s calling and I actually have a couple hours free before the hospital.”

I groaned but got up anyway. We put on leggings and sneakers, grabbed some water, and drove to the woods outside town. The air was cool and fresh, birds chirping everywhere as we walked the dirt path side by side. At first it felt nice. We talked about normal mom-daughter stuff — how my classes were going, her busy surgeries, and how pretty the changing leaves looked.

But then she brought him up again.

“You’re really gonna like him, sweetie,” she said with this big smile, stepping over a log. “He’s coming this weekend. Tall, strong, makes me laugh. I feel safe with him, like I can finally breathe after all these years.”

I almost tripped on a root. Tall and strong. My mind went straight to Derek — his big hands gripping me, that deep voice in my ear. I felt my face get hot and squeezed my thighs together while we kept walking. The hike was supposed to clear my head, but every step just made me more aware of the soreness still between my legs from that night. By the time we got back to the car I was sweating and my panties felt damp for all the wrong reasons.

Back home I tried to shake it off. I headed to campus for the day, but the library was where things really fell apart. I sat there with my nursing textbook open, highlighters ready, notes everywhere. But the words kept blurring. Instead of body systems and procedures, I saw him. The stranger. Derek. His hard body pressing me down into the mattress. Those grey eyes staring at me while he pushed that thick cock deep. The way his muscles flexed when he flipped me over and took me from behind like he owned me.

I squeezed my legs together under the table. My pussy throbbed just from the memory. Fuck, why couldn’t I shake this?

I thought about texting Maria and spilling everything. Like, “Girl, I got wrecked by my hockey coach and now I can’t stop thinking about his dick.” But the words wouldn’t come. How do you even explain that shit? I let some random tall guy from the bar carry me home drunk. I spread my legs wide for him without thinking twice. I came hard on his tongue while he ate me like he was starving. I barely even knew his name before he was balls deep, groaning in my ear. The shame felt heavy, like it was choking me. If I told her, she’d probably freak and call me crazy. Or worse, she’d want all the dirty details.

I stared at my phone screen for a long time in the quiet library. My thumb hovered over the search bar. I almost typed “grey eyes man bar near campus” or some stupid shit like that. Maybe I could find his socials or something. But I stopped myself and locked the phone. No. That night was a mistake. I needed to forget.

That evening back at the mansion everything felt too quiet. Mom was out again for another late shift. I took a quick shower, trying to wash away the dirty thoughts from the hike and the library, but it didn’t work. I lay in my childhood bed, the same one with the soft pink sheets I’ve had forever. The room still had some old stuffed animals on the shelf. It felt wrong doing this here, but I couldn’t help it.

My hand slipped under the blanket. I was already soaked. I rubbed my clit slow at first, biting my lip. Then I remembered how Derek sucked on it, how his thick fingers stretched me open. I pushed two fingers inside myself, pretending it was him. My hips started moving on their own. I grabbed my tit with the other hand, pinching the nipple like he did. The ache between my legs got stronger. I flipped onto my stomach, face buried in the pillow, and fucked myself harder with my fingers.

“Fuck… Derek,” I whispered into the fabric. I came fast, thighs shaking, biting the pillow so I wouldn’t moan too loud. My whole body felt tingly after. But right away the guilt hit me. I hated myself for this. Hated how weak I was. And I hated him for ruining me with one night. How the hell was I supposed to move on when my body kept begging for that hot dick again?

Just as I was catching my breath, my phone lit up on the nightstand. It was Mom calling.

“Hey sweetie,” she said when I picked up. “I’m stuck at the hospital with this emergency surgery. I’ll be staying late tonight so go ahead and lock up the house. Sleep well, okay? Love you.”

“Love you too, Mom,” I mumbled, trying to keep my voice steady even though my fingers were still sticky and my heart was racing. She sounded so happy and light, like the mystery guy was already changing her. I hung up and stared at the ceiling. Dad’s photo on my nightstand watched me. I felt guilty, horny, and confused all at once. Part of me hoped I’d never see Derek again. But another part, the loud needy part, hoped I would. Even if it was just one last time. My body craved him so bad it almost hurt. That deep voice. Those big hands. The way he filled me until I couldn’t think straight.

I rolled over and closed my eyes, but sleep didn’t come easy. All I could think about was running into him somewhere. Maybe at the rink. Maybe he’d pull me into a dark corner and remind me exactly why I couldn’t forget him. My hand drifted down again before I stopped myself.

This was getting dangerous.