Chapter 5
Ivy
For some reason, my hands won’t stop shaking. Maybe it’s just all this adrenaline that has nowhere to go. I’m not scared, not even nervous, really. The bar isn’t open yet, but the members keep drifting in and out, grabbing waters, shooting the shit, and sizing me up like the newest attraction in a freak show.
Felix and I managed to get the bar fully stocked despite my clumsy moment earlier. Thankfully, none of the bottles were broken, but I’m still a little shaken from hearing Blaze mention the Black Vultures. After that, Felix told me we had enough stock out on the bar and started showing me where he keeps the things that are “too important for Blaze to mess with.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at this. He’s the vice president of the club, but he’s like a clumsy toddler and even Felix knows it.
Now, though, as I hear his voice rising from the other side of the wall, I’m reminded that he does have power in this place. I wouldn’t even be here if he didn’t. Maybe I shouldn’t be. It’s clear by the stares that I’m not exactly welcome. Not that I’m just so desperate to stay in this shit hole, but I truly don’t have anywhere else to go.
My ribs still ache, my eye throbs, and my whole body feels sluggish, but the work is actually helping. The tasks are easy but labor-intensive. They’re somewhat mindless but require enough focus that my thoughts don’t wander to dark places.
It’s almost comforting.
Until I start hearing the voices through the wall. They probably don’t realize how loud they’re being. This conversation isn’t meant to be overheard, especially by me. Still, I don’t even pretend not to listen. It’s coming from one of the rooms I was expressly forbidden from entering.
They’re having Church now. It’s their secret, sacred, members-only meeting. Prospects aren’t even allowed, and strays are definitely forbidden. They apparently don’t know that their meeting room can be heard at the back of the bar in the corner closest to the kitchen.
They wouldn’t have reason to know, of course. Felix attends Church, and I can only assume the bar is usually closed when they meet. It’s almost thrilling to know I’m breaking one of the most important rules of the club. No non-members ever get this kind of access.
I listen intently as the voices in the room start to carry. They become heated in the way men get when they’re two seconds from blowing up at each other.
My feet move without my permission. I grab an empty crate, pretending to carry it into the kitchen. Even though there’s no one here to watch me, there’s no way I’m risking getting caught listening to their sacred meeting.
“That isn’t the point, Ghost,” I hear Blaze say.
He sounds frustrated and serious in a way I’m not used to him being.
“She’s a stranger,” Ghost answers. “Someone banged her up good, and she won’t talk to anyone about what happened to her. She’s a liability.”
My blood goes cold. They’re talking about me.
“That doesn’t make her a threat,” Blaze fires back.
“It does make her a gigantic question mark,” Hawk says, his voice cutting through like a blade.
“And we shouldn’t gamble with the club’s safety,” Ghost finishes the thought.
A round of shouts rises in agreement at his words.
I inch closer to the air conditioning grate, my heart pounding. The sound is so clear, I can hear boots shuffling and someone sigh near the grate in the Church room.
“You saw the sheriff,” Ghost says. “He didn’t drive out here to get air. The timing is way too suspicious.”
My lungs constrict at his words. He’s right. The timing was too suspicious. I’ve become naturally distrustful of cops, but is it possible that he was actually here for me? Was he sent?
No, I don’t even let myself entertain the thought. I can’t let myself go there. If he knows where I am, he would’ve sent in an army by now.
“It could be nothing,” Blaze argues, bringing me back to my senses. “You know Red likes stirring shit. We were due for a random drop in.”
“Could be,” Hawk agrees quietly. “But we do have to consider that she pissed off the wrong people. People who have Red in their pocket.”
A violent shiver runs down my spine. I know they’re right. Even here isn’t safe.
“Look,” Blaze says, in a firm, authoritative tone. “She’s scared. She’s hurt. She’s got nowhere to go. We can’t just–”
“What?” Ghost cuts in. “Throw her out on her ass? Of course we can. It wouldn’t be the first time.”
“Ghost,” Hawk says darkly. “We’re not going to do that. This isn’t like then.”
“No?” Ghost chuckles humorlessly. “Because it seems like I’m the only one thinking for the good of the club.”
“Enough,” Hawk says, and I hear the slamming of a fist. “You want to air your grievances, we do it privately.”
“She’s putting the club at risk,” Ghost argues passionately, and there are more grumbles of agreement.
I can’t listen anymore. I back away silently, praying the floorboards don’t betray me, and slip out the rear door. The hot air hits me like a slap.
It’s a little cooler than yesterday, but too hot for any real relief. Still, I drag in a breath, then another. I brace my hands on my knees as waves of nausea roll through me.
They’re fighting about me, and I don’t even blame them. They don’t know what they’re up against, and it isn’t fair of me to stay here and put these men in danger. They may not be saints, as Blaze put it, but they don’t deserve his wrath.
I collapse on the wooden step and place my head in my hands, taking in deep, slow breaths. I need a chance to think, to figure out my next move. I’ve got to do this entirely on my own, and I know it. My well-being isn’t their responsibility.
I’ve almost come up with a plan when I hear the back door open behind me.
Ghost
The door bangs shut behind me harder than I meant it to, but my blood is running hot. Church wasn’t solving a damn thing and tensions were running too high for me to stay. If I hadn’t left, I would’ve said something I really regretted. Walking out early was the only way to stop myself from putting my fist through the wall. Blaze kept talking in circles around everyone. Hawk was trying to stay as neutral as possible, but he’s obviously on Blaze’s side like always. The club is divided, but half of them think bringing her in was the right thing to do. It was quickly becoming chaos.
Through it all, all I could think was, we’ve been burned before. Nobody else seems to remember that, or maybe they just don’t care. Maybe I’m the only one still struggling with that particularly painful memory.
So, instead, I left. When I get outside, though, I stop short. Ivy’s sitting on the back steps, her elbows on her knees and head in her hands. She looks just as pathetic as Blaze pretends she is.
Something about seeing her like brings up a memory I’ve spent years burying. I shake my head, forcing the memory to pass, and it’s replaced by anger.
“You’re not supposed to leave the bar,” I bite out. “The men will expect drinks after Church.”
She startles, her head jerking up. Her eyes narrow when they land on me.
“No one told me,” she says coldly. “I didn’t realize breaks were off-limits. Does OSHA know about you guys?”
Her defensive spark hits me square in the chest. There’s that fighting spirit I’ve been hearing so damn much about. She’s just like…. Well, it doesn’t matter. She’s a problem to handle, now. That much is clear.
“You don’t get breaks when you haven’t actually done anything,” I shoot back. “You’ve been working for what, ten whole minutes?”
“I’ve been helping Felix all day,” she seethes. “And last I checked, I report to him and Blaze. If they have a problem with my work ethic, they can deal with it.”
“I’ll be sure to let them know about this,” I say, hoping she doesn’t realize how hollow the threat is.
Felix has been begging for help, and Blaze thinks this woman shits rainbows. Neither one of them will give a single fuck that she’s out here getting air, and that’s even more infuriating. I can’t do anything to discipline her, and she knows it.
“You do that,” she spits, standing and trying to brush past me back to the bar.
I don’t move, though. I want to make sure she gets this message loud and clear.
“You’re not wanted here,” I say lowly, hissing through my teeth. “You’re a threat to this club, a liability, and I won’t stop hounding you until you finally get the hell out of here.”
“I know exactly what I am to you,” she answers, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “Trust me, I’m not eager to overstay my welcome.”
“Great,” I say. “I’ll help you pack.”
“Just as soon as Maverick finishes my car,” she reminds me smugly. “I won’t be here a second longer.”
“I’ll rebuild the engine myself if I have to.”
I look down at her, taken off guard by the way her chest is heaving. I’m pissed, but I’m still a man.
She must notice my brief distraction, because she folds her arms over her chest and takes a step back, furious.
“Are you fucking serious?” she fumes. “Either hate me or drool over me, but pick a lane.”
“I wasn’t–” I start, fumbling for any excuse, but knowing there’s not one to be found on this entire compound.
“I’m not an idiot, Ghost,” she says, pushing her finger accusingly against my chest. “I know when a big oaf of a man is checking me out. You aren’t slick.”
I grab her hand, thoughtlessly pulling it against me, which doesn’t really help matters. She’s so small, so easily disarmed.
“Don’t touch me,” she says, pulling her hand back like it’s been burned. “You’re not allowed to touch me.”
She’s right, of course. And consciously, I don’t even want to. But some part of my goddamn lizard brain didn’t get the message. Instead, it lands on a loose curl that’s clinging to her forehead, broken free from the complicated contraption she’s wrapped her hair into. Without thinking, I push the strand behind her ear.
“I’ll touch you if I want to touch you,” I say lowly, my mouth working faster than my brain.
Her breath hitches for just a moment and her mouth tips up toward mine, maybe out of defiance. Her lips are so full and so tempting, and again I act without thinking. I’m moving in closer, so close that I can feel her breath against my face.
She rises on the balls of her feet, likely out of instinct. And yet, there’s this sharp, electric pull between us. Does she feel it too?
Just as I’m about to do the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever done in my life, I come to my senses and stop myself, pulling away quickly.
“Go inside, Ivy,” I nearly growl. “And don’t give me a reason to kick your ass out of here.”
She startles at my words, like she was also under whatever spell rendered me completely idiotic. With one last glare, she stumbles past me, slamming the door behind her.
I don’t know what the hell that was, but I know it can never happen again.
