Chapter 3 What did I do?

Elowyn

I can’t stop thinking about him for the life of me, but I don’t understand why. Not in the way all the noble girls whisper about him. Not in the way Mara’s voice sounded when she talked about finally being chosen for palace service. There’s no joy. No crush. Nothing. I just keep seeing his face. The way his eyes darkened and the way his jaw clenched. The way he looked at me was like I was something he didn’t want to exist.

I’m on my knees in one of the smaller hallways near the servant wing, polishing a section of marble floor that already shines. My reflection stares back at me, and I can’t help but examine it. My red hair is pulled back into a simple braid. My green eyes look too big for my face. I’m wearing a plain gray servant uniform. Nothing about me makes sense next to someone like him which is probably why he looked at me the way he did. I shouldn’t have been in his path or looked at him.

“Hey,” Mara says as she crouches down beside me. She’s carrying a small basket of cleaning supplies and wearing the same gray uniform that I am, but her eyes narrow in concern as she looks at me. “You’ve been scrubbing the same spot for ten minutes.”

“Oh. Sorry,” I say, blinking as I shake my head. She tilts her head, eyeing me with concern.

“You okay?” she asks. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out because I don’t know how to explain the pressure in my chest or the strange pulling sensation that hasn’t gone away since earlier or the way my body felt like it recognized someone my brain did not.

“I think I did something wrong,” I finally say and Mara frowns, sitting down beside me.

“What happened?” 

“I… Well…” I hesitate, then lower my voice. “I ran into… the Crown Prince.”

“Kael Elaris?” she says with wide eyes and I nod. “What happened?!”

“He stopped, looked at me, and then walked away,” I tell her and she grimaces in response.

“Yeah, that tracks,” she says and my stomach drops.

“That tracks? What do you mean that tracks?”

“I mean that he’s not exactly known for his warmth, Winnie,” she says quietly. “Most people say he’s cold. Untouchable. Kind of terrifying.” She is the only person in the world that calls me Winnie. I was always referred to as Hale by everyone in Ashwood until the Alpha called me by my full name. Actually, I wasn’t sure any of them even knew my first name until he said it.

“Did I break a rule? Am I not supposed to look at him?” I ask in a panic and Mara shakes her head quickly.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong,” she assures me, but it doesn’t feel that way. I’ve been invisible my entire life, but today someone powerful saw me and hated it.

“I felt weird,” I admit.

“Weird how?” she asks, her facial expression changing from concerned to curious.

“I don’t know how to explain it,” I start. “It was like pressure, I think, in my chest. It felt like I couldn’t breathe when he looked at me.”

“Well that’s not normal,” Mara says and the silence that stretches between us feels heavy. Neither of us say the obvious word. Mate. That feels too big, too impossible, and too cruel.

“You know, it’s probably just because I’m so tired,” I say. “It’s been a long couple of days.”

“Alright…” Mara says, studying me for a moment before moving to stand up. “But if you feel any worse, you better tell me.”

“I will,” I assure her with a smile. “I promise. Don’t worry about me.” I don’t tell her that the feeling hasn’t faded or weakened even a little bit since he disappeared from our hall. It’s just sitting there like it’s waiting for something.

The rest of the day passes in a blur of chores. Sweeping, polishing, carrying linens, refilling wash basins, mopping, and anything else they felt like throwing at me. I hate the anxiety I feel now. Every hallway feels too open. Every corner feels dangerous. I half-expect to see him again, but I half-hope that I won’t. When night finally comes, I retreat to the small dorm room that Mara and I share. Two twin size beds, one window between our beds, a simple rug on the floor between us, and two trunks at the ends of our beds. It’s a nice, simple room. It’s quiet and it’s safe.

I sit on my bed and stare at the wall. So many questions run through my head. Like why did he look at me like that? Why do I still feel like I did something wrong? Why hasn’t the pressure in my chest gone away? I’m an Omega. I have always been an Omega. I don’t have any powers. I don’t have a wolf. I don’t have anything special so whatever happened earlier couldn’t possibly mean anything. 

I press my hand over my chest and the pressure pulses against it faintly. It isn’t painful, but it definitely isn’t comforting either. It’s just a weird presence residing in my chest that wasn’t there before I saw the Crown Prince. I lie back in the bed, staring at the ceiling. Tomorrow, I’ll work harder. I’ll keep my head down and stay out of his way. Whatever that moment was, it wasn’t meant for someone like me and I refuse to let it become anything more.