Chapter 29 Do you hate me? then love me!
Daniel's POV.
But as I looked at the monitor, I froze. I saw what she had been playing all afternoon. It was the game I had developed years ago—the one I thought I had deleted in a fit of self-loathing. She must have reinstalled it via a USB drive.
"Why is this back on here?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper.
"Hm... to play it? I worked hard helping you finish that, so I might as well enjoy it," she said.
Elisa was one of the few who volunteered to help me when I had lost all confidence. Yet, back then, she was also the one who teased me the most about it. I never knew if she was being genuine or just looking for a reason to mock me.
I told her to uninstall it, claiming I didn't care about it anymore. Instead of obeying, she began lecturing me about my supposed "change" and my bitterness toward life.
"I'll only believe you've changed from being a NEET if you can become the old Daniel again—the one full of energy and dreams."
"Shut up," I replied. "I'm not bitter. Even you said this game was ugly—bad graphics, boring effects, mismatched sound, and a predictable plot."
I pointed at the screen, my finger trembling slightly. "I have thirty high-end Japanese games on this PC. Why would I waste time on that trash?"
I said it boastfully, pretending my own creation didn't matter. But deep down, it hurt. I had deleted it to erase the constant reminder of my failures.
As I stood there with a slumped posture and a crestfallen face, she suddenly looked at me, her expression softening.
"Come on, Didi. Play with me."
She was testing me—trying to see if I was truly over my past or if I was still hiding behind a mask.
"You'll really do anything to annoy me, won't you?" I muttered.
"Hm... you know that's my favorite hobby," she replied with a smile.
We locked eyes. I didn't want to show weakness. If I refused, I was admitting I was still bitter. If I accepted, I was letting her win.
"You're such a meddler. You aren't even a gamer, so why won't you just delete that copy?"
It frustrated me how she seemed to ignore my feelings of failure. But then, she looked at the screen and spoke softly.
"I don't know... I guess I like playing it even if it's not perfect. Even if the graphics aren't great, I find it fun."
She looked at me tenderly. "I think you actually did something great with your life, Didi. I admire you for it."
I was stunned. Usually, all I heard from her were insults regarding my Otaku lifestyle. I never expected a kind word from the "villain" of my life. I looked down as a sharp pang hit my chest. It was the praise I had craved for years but never received from anyone. No one had appreciated my effort, my sacrifice, or my small victory.
I bit my lip, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall.
"It doesn't matter to me if it's not the best or most exciting," she added. "What matters is that I like it and I'm enjoying myself. It's that simple."
Something inside me felt whole again. To know that at least one person truly enjoyed what I had created... it changed everything.
"You're such an idiot, Elisa," I said, forcing a small smile.
"Hmm..." she hummed back.
I couldn't say anything else without my voice cracking. I leaned back against the chair, hiding my face in my arms. I felt a strange sense of pride blooming in my chest—a feeling I didn't want to let go of. I kept my head down so she wouldn't see my expression.
"You're a pain. You haven't changed at all... talkative, noisier than my mom," I whispered into my arms. "You should be gagged and stuffed in a barrel."
At that, she leaned back against the chair too, until our heads were touching. We sat there in silence for a long time, the only sound being our steady breathing.
Then, out of the blue, she spoke.
"Do you hate me? ... Then love me."
The atmosphere shifted instantly. It wasn't awkwardness this time, but a heavy anticipation. I waited for her to say more, but she remained silent, as if waiting for my move.
I slowly lifted my head and rested my chin on top of hers, staring at the monitor's start menu.
"Do you hate me? Then love me!" I repeated, my voice firm. "That's how you're supposed to say it, Elisa."
Those words were the title of my game: "XXV: Do you hate me? Then love me!"
It was a story about a protagonist trying to stop his wife, a world-conquering warlord, from committing evil. Their love was the key to stopping the war, even though they spent the whole story fighting and annoying one another.
"Playing alone is boring. Want to play, Didi?" she asked, tilting her head back to look at me.
"I guess. Do you even have time today?"
"Hm... I have time. And since I'm so nice, I'll waste it so your day won't be so boring," she said with a grin.
She hopped up, looking genuinely happy, and headed for the door. "I'll go grab Romeo's laptop from his room."
"Hey, it's probably locked!" I called out after her.
"I know where he keeps the spare key, dummy!" her voice echoed from the hallway.
As she disappeared, I sat down in front of the PC. I just shook my head, a small laugh escaping my throat. I looked at the game's pixelated menu and started creating a lobby.
A surge of excitement hit me. I actually missed this game. Maybe it was just because it had been a while... or maybe it was because, for the first time, I felt like I had finally succeeded.
"Wait... how do I play this again?" I whispered to myself, clicking through the old settings. I couldn't help but smile. "I guess I'll have to let Elisa teach me."
