Chapter 112

As mom sits down on the bed with a bounce as I quickly read through my notes – one from Daphne, apologizing profusely for her betrayal, and the other from Luca – just a quick scrawl saying he’s glad I’m alive and he’ll see me soon. Smiling, grateful for both of them, I move towards my clothes.

“So!” Mom says, grinning devilishly at me. “Are you sleeping with both of your mates, or just Luca?”

I freeze, turning to her, shocked.

Mom bursts out laughing and I scowl, picking up the hat on the top of my clothing pile and throwing it at her. “Mom! Stop doing that just to shock me!”

“Oh, come on,” she sighs, laying back against my pillows. “What’s the point of having a daughter if you can’t embarrass her about her love life. So?” She raises her eyebrows at me, clearly wanting an answer.

And, well, because I have been wanting to talk to her about this, I sigh and nod. But I have trouble looking at her as we broach this awkward topic, so I concentrate, mostly, on getting dressed as we talk. Mom, perhaps sensing the delicate nature of this conversation, doesn’t give me any flack about it.

“I’m not sleeping with either of them,” I say quietly. “Though, with Luca, things are…progressing.”

“Oh realllly,” she says, dragging out the word with interest. “But not with Jackson?”

“Well, considering that he’s known for like, thirty-six hours…” I say on a sigh, pulling on my pants. My mom laughs, understanding.

“But…” I hesitate as I buckle the button of my pants. “Things with Jackson are…intense.”

“Intense?” my mom asks, “what does that mean?” Her voice is gossipy – I think to put me at ease. Because if she were worried, or scolding, I’d definitely be too embarrassed to go on.

“I mean like…I am very attracted to him, mom. And it’s not that I’m not into Luca – I very much am. It’s just…different.” I look up at her before I turn my back, tugging off the pajama shirt and reaching for the black sports bra that Daphne made me. I smirk, wondering how she arranged to send this all in secret.

“Well,” mom says, her voice considering, “I think that’s kind of…cool, honestly. It sounds like things are different between you and your mates because they’re very different people. I think that’s normal, and good. Or maybe it’s just that the Goddess is keeping your life spicy.”

I scoff and turn to glare at my mom as I pull the sports bra down over my chest. “Oh, come on, mom, I sincerely doubt that the Goddess is paying attention, with all she has on her plate.”

“I wouldn’t doubt her,” mom says, raising her eyebrows and cocking her head. “But I think Cora was right – your dad is actually the one to be talking to about this.”

I groan, shaking my head. “Mom, I can’t talk to him about which of his fated mates he was more into physically.”

“Well,” she says, primly squaring her shoulders. “We already know the answer to that.”

I burst out laughing and she joins me.

“But seriously, baby,” she says, her face falling into more considered lines. “Your dad is more empathetic about this stuff than you give him credit for. You should try. He’ll have a better perspective than literally anyone else on earth.”

I sigh, nodding, and then look down at my feet as I bite my lip.

“Don’t worry,” mom says with a sigh. “I’ll tell him before you get home.”

I gasp, wondering if she, too, can read my mind. “You will!?”

“I’ll keep it secret through your finals so that he’ll let you stay to take them,” she says, pointing a warning finger at me. “But you bring those boys home for winter break, both of them. And your dad will be prepared to meet them. But you owe him that truth – especially after all this deception.”

I bite my lip, knowing that this conversation could go in two different directions, and not wanting to take either of them. Luckily, mom picks for me.

“Yes, Ari,” she says slowly. “This means you have to tell both of your mates too. I don’t know how you’ve been justifying it to yourself, keeping this secret all along. But it’s time to come out with it – to everyone you love.”

I nod, ashamed of myself, and my little wolf rubs herself up against my heart, warming it, supporting me. “I know,” I say, my voice soft. “It was just…very hard to find a time that made sense. But I’ll…I’ll tell them. And bring them home for winter break.”

“Both of them?”

“Well, Rafe might have to tie Jackson up and throw him on the train,” I say, lifting my head to meet her gaze. She grins, but holds back her laugh. “But, yes. I’ll get them there.”

“Good!” mom says, hopping up off the bed as I pull my shirt on and do up all the buttons. She comes to my side and gives me a kiss on the cheek. “Now, let’s go to breakfast and break it do your dad that you’re going back to the murder school where you’ve almost died like three times.”

“Mom,” I say, catching her arm and stopping her before she heads to the door. “Are you…are you mad at me?” My voice breaks a little on my question, my eyes smarting with tears as I look at her, worried.

“Oh, baby,” she murmurs, shock and concern suddenly on her face. “Why would you think that?”

“Because,” I say, heaving a little shrug. “We – we lied to you for months. And I did something really dangerous. And I almost died, and showed up all bloody with two mates – and it must be so weird –“

Mom laughs a little, taking my face between her hands and shaking her head at me. “Oh, sweetheart,” she murmurs, and then she nods. “If I’m being honest, I could have done without the blood and the near-death. But I’m not mad at you – sweetie, I’m proud of you.”

My mouth twists in sudden surprise, and my eyes fill with unexpected tears. “You’re – you’re what?”

“Baby,” she wraps me in a hug as she speaks, “you are doing something difficult that nobody has done before. And it’s kind of kicking your ass!” I laugh, tears slipping down my cheeks as I nod and hug her back.

“Yeah,” I reply, my voice shaking. “It kind of is.”

“But look at you,” she says, pulling back and beaming into my face. “Look at you, baby! You’re kicking its ass too! You are finding your way, doing something you’re passionate about, and you’re succeeding. Ariel, my love,” her own eyes fill with tears now, “I’m so proud of you. I’d scream it from the rooftops for everyone to hear if it wouldn’t get you instantly kicked out.”

I laugh, and hug my mom again, and then we take a few moments to wipe my tears away before we head off to breakfast. Before we go, I tuck the little notes left on my bed into the back pocket of my Cadet uniform and prepare to go negotiate with my dad, the King.

Breakfast goes better than I thought it would, right from the start. It’s a short, unfrilled affair – just the four of us gathered around for coffee, and some toast and fruit, at a little folding table in the back hall. Cora isn’t here, unfortunately – she headed home after patching up some minorly-wounded cadets and sending Jesse off with a kiss.

As I pour my coffee, I realize that my mom has probably been up all night – that after I fell asleep she probably spent every minute rushing around from room to room, healing all the cadets who were injured in the Examination. I see the signs of it now that I look for them – the slight circles under her eyes, the yawn she hides with her hand.

But I just smile, and don’t call her out – because even though mom is full of jokes and would just brush it off, I know that she has the biggest heart of anyone in the world.

I resolve, again – for the thousandth time – to try to be more like her.

“So,” dad says, his voice all business as he offers me the basket of toast, which I grab perhaps too eagerly, loading up my plate with a serving size that is more like Rafe’s usual breakfast than mine. “We’re going to strike a deal.”

“We are?” I ask, crumbs spilling from my mouth as I speak with my mouth full.

Rafe just smirks at me, and I give him a little glare before I chew and swallow, focusing on our dad.

“Despite what you all think,” dad says, looking evenly around the table at us, “I do listen to you, and I am reasonable. I am not pleased with the fact that we were lied to, and that Ariel was put into an unnecessarily risky situation.” He levels his gaze at me now, and I sit up straighter, as I always do when I’m in trouble with dad.

“But,” he continues, and I go very still, hope beginning to swell in me. Dad folds his hands, continuing to look at me evenly. “I am aware that you have proven yourself at this Academy, Ariel. You have…passed the tests that weeded out other candidates, tests that were as much about cleverness as they were physical prowess – about finding out how to pass, even if your physical makeup didn’t make that easy for you.”

I frown a little bit here, my mind wandering to consider that I wouldn’t have been highly ranked enough to enter the academy or to pass the Examination if it hadn’t been for Jackson. That Jackson really did pull me through.

Is there something wrong with that, though? Is there a rule that every Cadet at the Academy must be a lone island of physical strength? Is there nothing useful about having good friends, and the right friends?

My dad continues talking, though, and so I push the question aside to mull over later, uncomfortable with it but needing to concentrate.

“So here’s what we’re going to do,” dad says, reaching out for an orange and beginning to peel it as he begins to lay out our plan.