Chapter 223
“I’m sorry,” Jackson says, and I can tell by his devastated tone that he means it very much. “I’m so sorry, Ariel.”
“Jackson,” I sigh, frustrated – because it’s very difficult to be angry with him when he’s being so sweet. “What are you even sorry for?”
He pauses and it’s instantly clear to me that he has no idea what it is that I’m mad about – he’s just ready to apologize for anything. I laugh a little and so does he when he realizes what is happening. He tucks his head down against my shoulder and I wrap my arms around him.
“Please,” he murmurs. “I am sorry if I’ve upset you – but I don’t understand. Please tell me.”
“It’s just – it’s happened twice tonight, hasn’t it? And more in the past few weeks. It’s like all of you boys make these decisions and strike these deals, usually with me at the center of them, and no one really asks me what I think. And sometimes I need that help – like the morning when Luca came and banged on your bedroom door and I had no idea what to do. But other times – like this decision about the timeshare? Jackson, you and Luca can’t just decide how I split my time without asking me about it.”
He nods, and down the bond I can see that he instantly understands and feels terrible. “We were just trying to make it easier on you,” he whispers. “It’s complicated – and we both get so riled when you’re between us.”
“I know,” I sigh, stroking his hair. “But just because it’s easier for you to decide without me sometimes doesn’t mean you should.”
“You’re right,” he sighs, pulling back a little to look me in the eyes. “I won’t do it anymore. I promise.”
“Thank you,” I whisper, smiling at him and continuing to stroke his hair. Then I frown, thinking about the deal that he struck with Luca. “You’re really fine with that? Just hanging out with me at night?”
“Well, I didn’t quite say at night. I just said I wouldn’t come to dinner and study time – that Luca could have that. Which is fine by me – I don’t know how any of you get any studying done in a big group like that anyway. I know Luca just talks the whole time.”
I smirk a little. “You grew up in a room full of boys too,” I say quietly. “I would have thought you’d have learned how to tune them out as well.”
“Yeah, but we knew how to be quiet,” he says, frowning at me like it’s obvious and making me laugh.
“So,” I say quietly. “Luca knows that you…sleep here now?”
“Oh, no,” Jackson says, laughing a little. “He never would have agreed to that.”
I gasp a bit and smack him on the arm, not used to a tricky side of him. He laughs a little too, enjoying himself. “Well then what does he think ‘at night’ means!?”
“Probably the dream state,” Jackson murmurs with a contented sigh. “Which we can use. But I’m not sure we’ll need it if I get you all night, and all morning, and in magic class…” he shrugs. “I think it’s fair.”
I bite my lip, a little uncomfortable that Luca doesn’t know that Jackson sleeps here now but…also knowing that he’s going to flip out if he finds out. I sigh, wondering what the best route here is – peace or transparency?
“I’m sorry,” Jackson says again, pressing a kiss to my shoulder. “I’ll do whatever you want. We can talk to Luca and change the plan – we’ll do anything you want.”
“Oh yeah?” I say, raising my eyebrows and grinning a little at him in the dark, wicked in my own turn. “And what if I said that I wanted Luca to sleep in the nook too?”
“What?” Jackson says, pulling back a little to stare at me, appalled.
“Yeah, you know,” I say, working hard not to laugh, “like, a little Ariel sandwich –“
Jackson snarls even as he sees that I’m kidding, tugging me close against him, possessive. He doesn’t say a word, but his answer to that proposal is clear. I laugh, I can’t help it.
Across the room, Rafe clears his throat in a loud and obvious way that lets me know we’re getting a bit loud for his tastes. I glance towards him and then back to Jacks, grimacing a little. He nods, letting me know he understands too, and that it’s time to settle down and get to sleep.
“Is that really what you want?” Jackson asks, worried, his arms still tight around me like he doesn’t want to let me go. “To have Luca here? Or…to spend some nights with him?”
“No,” I answer instantly, and as I say it I realize with a bit of surprise that it’s true – that…that I really don’t want to spend my nights with anyone but Jackson. Anxiety twists in me at the realization – what does that mean? Does it mean that my relationship with Luca is…less? Or…
But my wolf blatantly ignores my worry, trotting down the little bond within my soul like it’s a bridge and curling up at Jackson’s wolf’s side. His wolf grumbles his pleasure and curls around her, tucking his nose in next to hers and wrapping his tail close so that she’s nearly encircled. And I realize that…my connection to Luca aside, this is what my wolf wants, where she wants to be at night. Curled up with Jackson’s wolf, safe and warm and secure.
Jackson simply nods once, accepting my answer and not pushing for anything else. Then he presses his lips to mine and curls up next to me, wrapping me up tight against him in a way that is strikingly reminiscent of our wolves.
And so I decide not to worry about it – not now, at least. Because right now everything just feels so…completely right.
Instead I close my eyes and let myself drift off, warm and comfortable and complete.
Too few hours later, the curtain to my nook rips open and the pinkish light of dawn streams in.
“Up!” Rafe barks, a little too gleeful about it. “Time to get to work, lovebirds!”
I just groan and turn my head away from my stupid brother, pressing my other cheek to Jackson’s chest, over which I am – of course – sprawled.
Jackson likewise just wraps his other arm around me, not responding to Rafe.
But my brother’s lack of footsteps let me know that he is still standing there. “Go away,” I mumble. “I hate you. Go away.”
There’s a long beat of silence. “Do you guys seriously sleep like this?”
I turn my head back towards my brother with a sigh and crack an eye open. “It’s more comfortable than it looks. Do you want to try it?”
Rafe just bursts into laughter as Jackson snarls, tightening his arms.
“Up!” Rafe shouts again, leaning forward to give me a hearty smack on the calf before striding towards and into the bathroom.
“I don’t like this part,” Jackson murmurs. “I wasn’t counting on a Rafe alarm clock.”
“How about a Jesse one!” Jesse shouts, moving far more quickly than anyone should at this time of the morning and leaping over us and into the nook, landing on the bed on Jackson’s other side.
“Jesse!” I gasp, my eyes flying open to glare at him as I sit up. “You’re going to break my bed! Three wolves is too much –“
“Two point five at best, tiny cousin,” Jesse says, beaming at me, wide awake.
“This is my nightmare,” Jackson sighs, lifting a hand to cover his face, still not opening his eyes. “It’s…it’s too much chaos to wake up to.”
“This is what you signed up for, roomie!” Jesse says, pitching his voice louder than necessary as I slip off of Jackson and come to rest more reasonably at his side. “Sinclair chaos at all hours.”
Jackson just shakes his head once, refusing this as a choice.
I sigh and press a hand to his shoulder, sitting up fully. “It’s no use, Jacks,” I sigh, starting to stretch. “They’ll never let you sleep in. Just give in or he’ll start singing.”
“Which would be a blessing for you,” Jesse says, prodding Jackson’s shoulder. “I have an amazing voice.”
Jackson just sighs and pulls his hand away from his face, opening his eyes seemingly just to glare at Jesse.
“If you can’t stand the Sinclair level of chaos,” Rafe says, coming out of the bathroom with his face freshly washed, his voice overly cheerful, “then maybe you shouldn’t sleep here! Sinclairs only.”
I sigh as I stand, glaring at my brother, who just grins at me, clearly not intending at all to make this any easier on poor Jacksson.
“Well, that’s not a problem, if that’s a prerequisite,” Jackson murmurs, pushing himself up so his back is against the headboard. He runs a hand through his very messy hair. “I’ll become a Sinclair if you want me to.”
Jesse and I both stare at him, baffled, and Jesse speaks for both of us when he says “wait, what?”
