Chapter 5 5

CHAPTER 5: FELIX

"What the fuck is wrong with you today?" Paul yelled. He skated hard over to me, his hockey blades scraping loud against the ice. "The puck just flew right past you. You didn't even move your stick."

"I am tired," I growled, gripping my hockey stick so tight my knuckles turned white. "I did not sleep at all last night."

Paul rolled his eyes and sighed. "What did your dad do now?"

"It is not about my father," I snapped, my inner wolf pushing hard against my chest. "And stop talking bad about him. He is the Alpha of this Pack. He has a lot of heavy pressure on his shoulders."

But deep down, I was lying. It was because of my father. Alpha Knox was a terrifying, powerful figure, and lately, his anger was out of control. He was putting all that pressure on me. He wanted me to be the perfect heir, the next Alpha, and a lethal killer in the Pack warrior ranks. Last night, he stayed up for hours screaming at me about my future, demanding I stop focusing on hockey and start focusing on Pack bloodlines.

To make things worse, my younger sister, Olive, was caught sneaking out of our pack house past curfew. She is only fifteen, and my dad almost lost his mind. I had to step in and take the blame just to protect her from his rage. Being the Alpha's son meant I had no freedom, and keeping Olive safe was becoming a full-time job.

Paul gestured for me to follow him toward the bench. "Come on. I need water."

We skated off the ice, and Paul grabbed his water bottle. He looked at me through his hockey helmet. "Your dad is pushing you too hard, Felix. Everyone in the Pack can see it. You look like you want to kill someone."

"He wants me to be perfect," I muttered, my jaw tightening. I felt the hot, angry energy of my wolf rising up in my veins. "He wants me to be a monster on the ice and a king in the Pack. I am eighteen now. I am supposed to take my Alpha trials soon, and he reminds me of it every single second."

"That sucks, man," Paul said, wiping sweat from his forehead. "But you cannot let him ruin your life. Have you even talked to your mum about this ?"

"My mom obeys his every word and she travelled last week. And my father rules with an iron fist. There is no talking to him."

“So if it is not just about your dad, why else didn't you sleep?" Paul asked. "You look completely wired."

"I have too much shit going on," I said, slamming my hockey stick against the bench. "Managing the hockey team, protecting Olive from my dad's temper, and dealing with my wolf's anger. It is too much for senior year."

"Send Olive to my house for a few days," Paul offered. "My parents are high-ranking warriors. Your dad won't mess with them."

I glared at him, my vision turning slightly blurry as my wolf pushed forward. "I am fine, okay? Just drop it. A night without sleep is not going to kill me."

“No, but it messes up your hockey game," Paul muttered, looking away. "The scouts are watching. If you play like trash, you lose your shot at the pros."

Something inside me snapped. The word trash triggered the monster inside me. Before I could think, I grabbed the front of Paul's hockey jersey and yanked him off his feet, pulling his face right up to mine.

"What the fuck did you just say to me?" I roared. My voice carried a dark, heavy Alpha command that made the air feel thick.

Paul gasped, but he forced himself to look me in the eye. "Felix. Let go of me."

“Not until you take it back!" I yelled. I felt the terrifying strength of my wolf taking over my arms. I wanted to smash him into the boards. I wanted to break something.

Paul didn't fight back. He stayed calm. "I cannot help you if you do not listen. You asked me to tell you when your wolf is taking over. I am telling you right now. Get your fucking hands off me, Felix."

Those words hit me like cold water. Something clicked in my brain, and I instantly let him go.

I stumbled backward, staring down at my own large hands. Just a second ago, I was practically choking my best friend, the Beta's son, against the wall. I felt a wave of disgust hit my stomach. Who was controlling my body? It didn't feel like me. Paul was my brother in arms. I would never want to hurt him. So why did I do it?

Paul adjusted his jersey and patted my shoulder. "It is okay, man. We will keep practicing. You just have to control the beast."

I shook my head, my chest heaving as I tried to calm my breathing. "Fuck. I am sorry, Paul."

"Don't worry about it," he said, turning around to fill his water bottle at the cooler.

Last year, Paul and I made a serious deal. Whenever my anger took over and my Alpha blood became too dangerous, he had to stop me before I did something terrible. We made that promise after a fight at a rival Pack party. Another wolf had insulted my family, and I lost total control. I almost tore his throat out with my bare teeth. I didn't mean to go that far, but the black rage took over, and I didn't even know what I was doing.

Paul and the other hockey guys had to physically drag me off the guy and throw me into the truck.

That night, Paul told me I needed serious help. I couldn't argue with him because it was the truth. But I refused to talk to the Pack elders or some stupid counselor. They would just tell me that my powerful, angry father was the reason my own wolf was so unstable. I already knew that. But I refused to use my father as an excuse to be a monster. I wanted to be a leader, not a tyrant.

The problem is, Paul is not always around. But I made the same deal with my sister. If my anger gets out of control, she knows what to do. One word. Stop. That's all she has to say. It doesn't always work but it's starting to. When I hear it I imagine a flashing red alarm going off, screeching at me to stop whatever I'm doing and calm the fuck down. I picked that word to prove to myself I'm not like my dad. That word never worked on him. My mom would scream it over and over and it only made him beat her more. He got power from that word, power to keep going. To me, it's the opposite. It's my trigger word to drag me back into reality, out of whatever caused me to lose control.”

But today, my control was slipping faster than usual. And honestly, it wasn't just my dad making me angry.

My mind flashed back to the morning. To my first class. To that new girl.