Chapter 109

Alyson

Ryan holds me at last.

It feels just like I had recalled, just as I had dreamed about for so long, and I groan when he shifts, praying he isn't intending on getting up. His arms pull me back up into his lap, curled up on the couch in our suite, laid out under a heavy, furry blanket that feels more like a shield than anything else right now. The fire burns nearby in the fireplace and the smell of burnt cedar swarms the room.

It reminds me of the woods where I was assaulted a few days back.

"Stop it," Ryan hums, his wolf growling through his voice gently, his mind heavy on my thoughts. I have missed him in my mind-link. It feels comfortable having him back in my head. "Please, think of positive things, darling. You're back here with me."

"And what of—" I cough slightly, choking on my inhale. "—Olivera?"

"He's in the barracks," he says simply. He hasn't spoken of the rogue Alpha yet.

I have heard murmurs though and swiped through my mates mind to know that Olivera ran into Ryan in the woods by chance, the two of them ready to kill each other over me thinking I was under either of their care in that moment. They were both wrong. When they heard me scream, they dropped focus on each other and came scrambling for me.

It's hard to recall what happened after they arrived in the woods.

I've done nothing but block it from memory.

"Alpha," a warrior from our pack hums, poking his head into the room. I jump slightly, Ryan's grasp around my sides and back tightening in their hold. "I'm sorry," the warrior says, bowing his head. "I didn't mean to startle the Luna."

"Of course, Lucas," Ryan says, brushing a hand down the gentle waves of my long hair. "What bring you here?"

"Fritz, Alpha," he says, his voice wilted. "He is at the foyer doors, requesting to be seen."

"I'm not willing to speak with him now," Ryan growls, his wolf's anger rumbling against his chest and then against my head where I lay on his abdomen. "Dismiss him."

"Alpha, he asked to speak with Luna Alyson," the warrior chokes.

My mate peers down at me, like a pup lost in the rain and looking for shelter, for direction, for any semblance of safety. If Ryan were to release me from his grasp now, I may break for good, my wolf so ready to give up everything we have known for peace and to run until we both collapse. I want darkness; I want silence.

I want the elders to be the good wolves I thought they always were.

"Darling, what is your decision?" Ryan breathes into my scalp.

My only reply is to cling to him tighter.

Ryan waves the warrior away and continues to hold me to his chest. I bury my face against his shoulder, too frightened to move, and too embarrassed to speak. I wish I could have faced the elders, and before the incident, I may have been able to, but not after what Maddox did.

Not after what Marshal had confirmed.

"Everything he said was true," I mumble, shaking my head. "I didn't want to believe Olivera, but he was right. The elders have taken rogues in for experiments. I wasn't sure at first but to hear Marshal say it—"

"When did you meet Marshal?" Ryan asks, cocking his head.

"Olivera and his pack of rogues met him in some cave in the woods. It was the day you found me. That morning, Marshal tried to reason for my release. He said he wouldn't be able to let the rogues go, though, just the opens that escaped Wilshire."

"So you heard about the escape, huh?"

I nod, hopeful the others that are trapped can somehow escape, although it's unlikely. "I don't know what to do, Ryan. It just doesn't make any sense. All this time, the elders have been protecting us all, while enslaving rogues and running tests on them? Why would they ever do something like that? I thought they were better than that."

"We can't stand to know why people do bad things, darling," he hums, brushing my hair off my blushing, warm cheeks. "I will tell you this, the Wilshire escape was an easy feat."

My eyes grow wide with shock. "You know who did it?"

"I did, darling."

My stomach twists and I sit up with wide, worried eyes. "You helped them escape? How? Did the elders try to fight you?"

"Slow down, darling, it's going to be okay. We will discuss everything later. I just want you to rest. None of this concerns us anymore."

My brows pinch. "What do you mean it doesn't concern us?"

"Olivera is in the barracks and you are back in my arms, sweet Luna. Our lives can finally return back to normal and none of this will ever haunt us again."

I toy with his shirt buttons, needing something to tinker with while I feel like my emotions are going down a slick, unpredictable waterslide. "Ryan, we can't just leave the rest of the rogues in the elders grip like that. They have to at least be helped in escaping. It's not right."

"Sweetheart, we can't save them all."

"What if the moon goddess said that about me?" I prod, watching his face turn sour. "What if she left me behind because she already saved a few others? Then I would be dead, Ryan. I would be stuck where I was, with the life I had, and never would have found you."

He shakes his head, something sad glinting in the corner of his eyes. "Darling, you know going against the elders—it will be messy."

"I don't care about the mess," I breathe, my heart aching. "I care about what is right."