Chapter 117

Alyson

I eat breakfast alone, Ryan already training the warriors on the new plan. We have to find the rogues that are sick and expect to find symptoms in the weaker pack wolves so they can seek healers immediately. He wanted to do this alone, knowing he will be going out with them this afternoon to try to make things right.

To ease my mind, I sit alone in the busy cafeteria, a few nightshift warriors roaming in for coffee and breakfast before heading to bed. I sit at the table in the furthest corner, a little dark from the lack of light in this direction and slightly cold. In a weird way, I feel like it's punishment for being so wrong for so long.

I tip my head to the side, leaning on the wall and moving the eggs around the plate as though to trick someone I have been eating. No one should care. No one should worry that I feel like the world is crashing down around me. It's my fault, anyways.

"Mind if I sit here?"

I turn, expecting to let them go ahead and take the whole tiny table, ready to go sit soberly in my bedroom, alone, as if to punish myself further. I don't get to speak a word, though, seeing Olivera hesitate behind me, hands stuffed into his front pockets.

I nod, wordlessly, in utter surprise he is still here.

After our moment in the conference room I had just assumed he left.

He sits down, grabbing my coffee cup and taking a sip. I don't mention it, just waving it back towards him when he shoves it at me. I haven't hardly had a sip of it. I prefer tea but I didn't want to put the kitchen staff out by requesting it. I just want to be a fly on the wall for now. Nothing more.

"Why are you over here moping, Luna?" he asks.

His voice is raw and full of tire. I pity him more than I pity myself.

"I just don't feel like being social today," I admit, staring at my lap. "Ryan is going out with the warriors today. Going to see about speaking to the elders and maybe making things right. We have to get ahead of this virus."

I expect him to yell, to fight me on what we're planning to do, but he sounds oddly calm.

"And what are you doing today, sweetheart."

I raise a brow in his direction. "Ryan doesn't appreciate you calling me that."

"Would either of you two prefer witless mutt of a Luna, or sweetheart?"

I only scowl.

"I'm sorry about that, by the way," he hums, looking through me. "For all of what I did that day. I never wanted to hurt you, Alyson."

Hearing him say my name makes his apology sound almost believable.

"Thanks," I murmur. "I forgave you instantly. I shouldn't have told you what Fritz had shown me in her file. It was just—"

"Don't talk about it anymore," he gasps. "Please."

I nod, sealing my lips closed. He bows his head, fighting a war in his head, one I have fought before. He lost his mate and in my first life, I lost mine. It is a pain unknown to most wolves, being rejected or watching your mate walk away from you; it's like watching them die and knowing no matter what, they aren't coming back.

I was given a blessing, though, and that was Ryan. Olivera doesn't get the same opportunity. He has to live knowing what he lost will not be replaced.

"You never did answer my question," he says, grabbing my plate of cold eggs along with the coffee he already stole from me. I roll my eyes and he chuckles, picking at my food. "What are you doing today?"

I shrug. "Just waiting for Ryan to return unharmed."

"Well, that's not fun."

"These aren't fun times, Olivera. You know that."

He shoves the plate and coffee mug aside, standing upbruptly. I flinch, almost out of reflex, and he ignores the motion, thankfully. He takes my arm in his hands and pulls me to follow him as we make our way outside to the front of the palace and then down the cobble roads of the village in our pack lands.

I want to ask him where we are going, but I don't wonder long.

He stops at the mouth of an old trail that leads through the woods nearby the pack, one that ends at the top of a daunting waterfall. I swallow hard, seeing my shorts and tee-shirt combination with simple shoes that weren't made to be worn for an extensive hike.

The sun shines over his hopeful features, turning to flash me a salesmen's smile.

"Let's do this trail," he says.

I crane to turn slightly, noting that we are alone, unfollowed by warriors of my pack. "I don't know about this, Olivera. It could get us in trouble with my mate."

He waves a hand in front of his face like shooing away a fly. "Forget about his concerns. It's not like we're going to do anything bad. It's just a hike. We need to clear our minds and get some sunshine. It's a good distraction, too, waiting for him to come back. By the time we are done and get to the palace, it will be time for him to come home and everything will be fine."

I hesitate at first but he is right, I need this break to relax and clear my thoughts.

We begin the hike silently, the trees rustling with fresh, green leaves and the sun pouring through the towering branches above. I focus on the sounds of the wind, the colors of the birds in the trees, and the dirt path where we weave in and out of the meadow that leads to the waterfall.

At last, we reach the edge of the trail, the water running gently over a smooth rock that leads to the edge of a cliff where the water pours over in the gallons. I take off my shoes, the water cold as it barely runs over my toes and I walk toward the cliffside, leaning over slightly to look over the cascading waterfall.

Firm hands grip my sides, making me jump, almost slipping as I threaten to fall over, but Olivera keeps his grasp hard, spinning me around and pulling me to his broad chest, his heart racing so fast and hard that I can feel it in my chest.

I squirm slightly, unsuccessfully trying to pull back.

"Olivera, what the hell are you doing? Let me go."

His eyes darken at least four shades. "Don't deny me."

His lips plow into mine brashly, taking me by such surprise that I when I jerk backwards, my feet slip off the rock and I go weightless in my fall.