I Had the Urge to Lick Him Clean (Lila's POV)
I was out of bed early on the day we left—too wired to sleep the night before, too aware that this was my first time leaving the country.
What I hadn't expected was running into Adrian at the fifth-floor gym. Normally, by the time I dragged myself up for a morning workout, he was already downstairs...
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Chapters
1. My Ex's Uncle （Lila's POV）
2. I Was Finished （Lila's POV）
3. She's Got Some Nerve（Lila's POV）
4. Appraising Merchandise（Lila's POV）
5. Castoffs（Lila's POV）
6. One Lie. One Night. Everything Balanced on the Edge（Lila's POV）
7. He Had Said Forever, Just the Night Before（Lila's POV）
8. More a Lowell Than He Ever Was（Lila's POV）
9. People Like That Shouldn't Be Stepped On (Adrian's POV)
10. I Figured（Lila's POV）
11. A Contract Where Feelings Dare Not Follow（Lila's POV）
12. Bring Nothing But What You Can't Leave Behind（Lila's POV）
13. Who Is the Girl in the Photographs（Lila's POV）
14. She Was Never Meant to Be His Move (Adrian's POV)
15. Fat, Plain, and Sitting Right Next to Him（Lila's POV）
16. I'm Used to It（Lila's POV）
17. Humiliation at the End of the Corridor（Lila's POV）
18. You Could Have. You Didn't（Ethan's POV）
19. Gone by Morning（Lila's POV）
20. His Lips Were Burning Hot（Lila's POV）
21. I Got Drunk and He Put Me on My Back（Lila's POV）
22. Welts on Her Back（Lila's POV）
23. No One Cared What Happened After the Door Closed（Lila's POV）
24. I Was Curious to See How She'd Seduce Him（Lila's POV）
25. She Didn't Need My Permission（Lila's POV）
26. You're So Tense（Lila's POV）
27. Every comment was just another way of saying I didn't belon（Lila's POV）
28. I Can Keep This Under Control（Lila's POV）
29. I Told Myself to Stop Falling for Him（Lila's POV）
30. Everyone Said They Were Perfect（Lila's POV）
31. You Don't Mind, Do You? (Lila's POV)
32. He's That Way with Everyone (Lila's POV)
33. You're the Only One Who's Ever Said That to Me
34. Lila, Who Are You, Really?
35. I'm Done Taking It — Time to Fight Back （Lila's POV）
36. What Are You So Afraid Of (Lila's POV)
37. This Is My House. Get Out (Lila's POV)
38. I Had the Urge to Lick Him Clean (Lila's POV)
39. Your Body Is Disgusting (Lila's POV)
40. I've Never Set Foot in a Kitchen (Lila's POV)
41. Ears Red Enough to Bleed (Lila's POV)
42. The Storm Pushed Us Together (Lila's POV)
43. He Looked Like He Was About to Meet God (Lila's POV)
44. That's Not Your Fault (Lila's POV)
45. Lila Is the Lady of This House (Adrian's POV)
46. Why Didn't I Kill You When You Were Small (Lila's POV)
47. When the Drug Takes Over (Lila's POV)
48. He Knew. He Just Didn't Think I Mattered (Lila's POV)
49. The Door That Closed (Lila's POV)
50. Her Panic Is My Pleasure (Lila's POV)
51. His Jacket on Her Chair (Adrian's POV)
52. And Then There Was No More Week (Lila's POV)
53. We'd Never Been in the Same Frame (Lila's POV)
54. Adrian Is the Center of the Universe (Lila's POV)
55. He Was Never Unkind to Me. He Was Simply Like That with Everyone (Lila's POV)
56. He Did It Anyway (Lila's POV)
57. They Gave Me One Month to Let You Go (Lila's POV)
58. I Could Always Do This Alone (Lila's POV)
59. You Look Like You're Lit Up From the Inside (Lila's POV)
60. October Fourth, Crossed Out (Lila's POV)
61. Get In. I Found a Good Place (Lila's POV)
62. All I Need Is a Happy Birthday (Lila's POV)
63. We'll Make It Up Another Time (Lila's POV)
64. I Almost Believed It (Lila's POV)
65. She Came Because I Was There (Lila's POV)
66. His Mouth Was Smiling. His Eyes Were Not (Lila's POV)
67. Knowing It Would Hurt Doesn't Mean It Doesn't (Lila's POV)
68. I Could Hear My Own Heartbeat (Lila's POV)
69. He Only Ever Called Me Baby (Lila's POV)
70. Your Daughter Starved to Death (Lila's POV)
71. Just One Day (Lila's POV)
72. I Will Not Lose (Lila's POV)
73. Get Out of My Room (Lila's POV)
74. What Does That Have to Do with Me?
75. It's Time for Me to Go (Adrian's POV)
76. he First Day After She Left (Adrian's POV)
77. Somewhere Safe Enough to Fall Apart (Lila's POV)
78. He Never Asked (Lila's POV)
79. You Used to Weigh Two Hundred Pounds (Lila's POV)
80. The Only Reason I Haven't Left You (Cecilia's POV)
81. We Haven't Broken Up. The Contract Is Still in Effect (Lila's POV)
82. You Can't Get Away (Lila's POV)
83. Out Here, What I Say Goes (Lila's POV)
84. Kidnappers? (Lila's POV)
85. So Close. Just Now, I'd Been So Close (Ethan's POV)
86. Deal With That Fake Girlfriend (Adrian's POV)
87. The Car, or the Horse? (Adrian's POV)
88. I Didn't See You in the Hall (Lila's POV)
89. I'm Going to Win (Lila's POV)
90. Life (Lila's POV)
91. What A Poser (Lila's POV)
92. What Was Your Inspiration? (Lila's POV)
93. The Final Result Of This Competition Is— (Lila's POV)
94. I Respect The Judges' Decision (Lila's POV)
95. A Sales Livestream (Lila's POV)
96. Do You Know How Much We Sold Tonight? (Lila's POV)
97. The Real Opportunity Had Arrived! (Lila's POV)
98. Do You Need Money That Badly? (Lila's POV)
99. Now It's Your Turn (Lila's POV)
100. I'm Going Back (Lila's POV)
101. Money and Power Are the Only Truth (Alexander's POV)
102. You're a Lot More Formidable Than I Imagined (Lila's POV)
103. Very Good (Lila's POV)
104. Was That on Purpose? What a Good Aim (Lila's POV)
105. You're Exactly Who I Meant to Hit (Lila's POV)
106. You're the One Who Taught Me (Lila's POV)
107. The Shrimp, the Rival, and the Offer I Never Asked For (Lila's POV)
108. Unless You Find Yourself a New Backer (Lila's POV)
109. Let's See Which of Us Comes Out on Top (Lila's POV)
110. It Wasn't Her Who Needed Me. It Was Me Who Needed Her（Adrian's POV）
111. The Other Shoe Has Finally Dropped (Lila's POV)
112. I'd Just Told Him I Didn't Need His Help. Then He Helped Me Anyway (Lila's POV)
113. Find Yourself Someone to Lean On (Lila's POV)
114. Depends on My Mood (Lila's POV)
115. Love Doesn't Require Qualifications (Lila's POV)
116. She Doesn't Deserve to Be My Rival Anymore (Lila's POV)
117. I Haven't Eaten All Day (Lila's POV)
118. My Soul Was on Fire（Adrian's POV）
119. I Don't Owe You Anymore（Adrian's POV）
120. Today's Me Is Tomorrow's You（Cecilia's POV）
121. Now Can We Start Over? (Lila's POV)
122. Don't Put Too Much of Your Heart Into Alexander (Lila's POV)
123. Then Let's Say I Never Came Today (Lila's POV)
124. Please Don't Contact Me Again (Lila's POV)
125. Then What About Cecilia? (Lila's POV)
126. The Scent That Had Carved Itself Into My Heart（Adrian's POV）
127. I Don't Believe in Fate—I'll Rewrite It Myself (Lila's POV)
128. At Least This Time, He Was Still Here When I Woke (Lila's POV)
129. Friends Are Just Friends (Lila's POV)
130. Believe Me—I'm Very Rich Now (Lila's POV)
131. If You Change Your Mind, Contact Me Anytime (Lila's POV)
132. Adrian, You Had It Coming (Adrian's POV)
133. Like Meat Tossed Into a Pool of Piranhas (Lila's POV)
134. No Purpose—I Just Didn't Want You Made a Fool Of Without Knowing It (Lila's POV)
135. I Understand. I Just Can't Forgive (Lila's POV)
136. Lila, So This Is What It Feels Like to Not Be Cared About (Adrian's POV)
137. And You Bought a Whole Apartment for "Occasionally"? (Lila's POV )
138. Only Liking Me Isn't Enough (Lila's POV )
139. Adrian, What Will You Do? (Alexander's POV )
140. I'm the Boss (Lila's POV )
141. I Don't Care (Adrian's POV)
142. I'll Take the Bet (Lila's POV )
143. If We're Auditing, We Audit All of It (Adrian's POV)
144. Tell Adrian (Lila's POV )
145. She Could Die (Adrian's Grandfather's POV )
146. Dozens of Missed Calls (Lila's POV )
147. We Missed Each Other Just Like That (Adrian's POV)
148. No Regrets (Lila's POV )
149. He Had Nothing Left, So He Could Say Anything (Lila's POV )
150. The Door Was Knocked On With His Name, but I Opened It Myself (Lila's POV )
151. I'm Asking You First
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