II. Ad Finem Fidelis
I feel like laughing, as if Cesare just told a joke.
And it could be a joke, if I didnât know him well enough to understand that thereâs not a single thread of humor in his body, carved from muscle and veiled in violence.
Thatâs why I only grit my teeth and swallow any provocation, any sound that might seem like mockery. I know better than to anger him. Especially with Matteo just one table away, staring at me so intensely, so sharply that it wouldnât surprise me if he could see straight through me.
âWhy me?â I ask, keeping my eyes locked on Cesare. âIâm not family.â
And that, theyâve always made a point of reminding me.
Iâm not Famiglia, in any sense.
I donât belong here, in this life, and itâs never been a secret.
âHah, youâre really an ungrateful bitch!â Matteo scoffs, leaning back with a dull thud, his thick arms crossing over his chest, stretching his shirt tight. âWe fed you, gave you a roof over your head, even though we had no responsibility for the daughter of a woman who couldnât even live long enough to make it to the altar! And this is how you thank us? With that bold, arrogant tongue?â
A bitter taste fills my mouth. My teeth tighten, but I still donât reply. Not because Iâm scared of Matteo, but because, in a way, heâs right.
Even if I hate this house, this world of blood and gunpowder, the smell of fear, blind loyalty, and warped purpose⊠This is my reality.
And all because of my mother, who dragged me out of Spain to stain my colorful days with the gray filth of the SocietĂ Romano, operating right under everyoneâs noses.
I used to be happy. But then she met Angelo. She fell in love. And she paid the price for it.
Iâm still paying.
âThatâs exactly why it has to be you.â Cesare ignores Matteo, who only exhales sharply in frustration. âYouâre not on any records, Marina. Weâve kept you well-hidden all these years. No one would recognize you as a Romano or tied to the SocietĂ .â
He pauses, his eyes sliding from my face to my neckline, but heâs not looking at my breasts. Itâs like heâs looking through me, before he adds, voice rougher, âYou donât carry our honor on your back. Not yet.â
The massive wooden clock fills the silence, its long hand ticking each second until it makes a full circle, a long minute dragging me closer to the inevitable fate Iâve been so desperately trying to escapeâmonths spent thinking, searching for openings, ways to get as far away from this place as possible when that same clock strikes midnight on my birthday.
Yet here I am now⊠so close yet still so far away.
âWhat if I say no?â I ask, not boldly, not really with challenge or bite.
But Cesare lifts his eyesânow dark enough to remind me of burnt honeyâ and drums his own knuckles.
âOf course, you can say no.â Finally, he speaks, and I release a relieved breath that catches in my throat too soon. âYou can always say no and keep following that foolish escape plan of yours⊠which, honestly, will only end one way: with your body beaten and your throat cutâŠâ
He pauses, revealing in my crumbling expression, as my heart skips a beat, and a shiver runs through every damn inch of me.
My chest turns cold.
My stomach, my blood, everything freezes completely.
I blink once, twice, three times fast, my eyes stinging, my breath faltering, threatening to break into a strangled sob.
Cesare knows.
He knows!
And yet, he just rests his elbows on the arms of the chair, fingers still interlaced, as if he hasnât just sentenced me.
âOrâŠâ His thumb glides slowly across his beard, tracing his jawline. âYou can be a good girl for me and buy the freedom you want so badly.â
This time, I canât help the bitter, sarcastic laugh that escapes meânot that he seems to mind.
âBy selling my body?â
âI donât want you to sleep with Enzo Bianchi. I want you to seduce him, play with him.â Cesare lowers his hands. âIf a quick and easy fuck worked, I wouldnât need you.â
My stomach twists.
âHe didnât look at any of the whores I sent him.â Cesare smiles, just that hint of a smirk, the slight curl of his lips thatâs so typical of him. Not exactly sarcastic or amused. Just a dangerous, irritably attractive curve.
Even though Iâd rather have my throat slit than admit that out loud.
âIn fact, not only did he not care about themâhe even killed one.â
âKilled?â I choke out, my mouth growing even more bitter.
âGood thing you learned how to fight as well as seduce a man,â Cesare continues, thoughtfully and lightly sarcastic. âThough Iâve heard plenty of praise for your kicks, very little about your ways of bringing a man to his knees.â
Matteoâs muscles tighten, stretching his already too-small shirt to the point of discomfort. Itâs unsettling. Almost claustrophobic to watch him move and constrict everything.
His demonâs clean-shaven jaw clenches when he feels my gaze, but he doesnât look back at me. Instead, he stares at the table, the floor, anywhere but me, his posture so rigid and his shoulders so stiff that even his skin seems ready to split.
Even Cesare glances at him, eyes narrowing just enough to betray, for a brief second, that the out-of-place reaction hasnât gone unnoticed.
âOn second thoughtâŠâ the Sotto Capo says again, pulling my eyes back to his face, which somehow looks even darker now. âMaybe you really donât have what it takes to seduce a Bianchi.â
I frown, but before I can ask what game heâs playing this time, he finishes: âAnd if you canât do thatâŠI wonât need you.â
Another shiver runs down my spine.
After all, I understand what heâs saying and what he really means.
If Cesare doesnât need me, my only option is to go back to my escape plan. But he knows. He knows exactly how I plan to run, and I wouldnât be surprised if the heads of those who thought about helping me are already waiting outside my bedroom door.
Thatâs the kind of man the SocietĂ Romanoâs second-in-command isâcolder and more merciless than Don himself. The most feared Romano of them all, the one who makes everyone dance to his tune, not for himself, but for Salvatore. For the Famiglia.
He wouldnât hesitate to end my life. He probably wouldnât even feel satisfaction in ending it. To him, to this family, I mean nothing. Whether I live or die doesnât matter.
Until I become an inconvenience.
Until the moment I breathe a hint of betrayalâŠ
Because their motto isnât Ad Finem Fidelis for nothing.
Loyal until the end.
No matter the price.
âAlright,â I say firmly, even though everything inside me is trembling. Even though my chest is tight and my stomach is frozen, Iâll do what he asks. Iâll follow his orders because I donât want to die.
Because I didnât make it this far to die like this. I didnât survive almost six years in hell just to surrender to the devil now⊠not when Iâm so close to walking out of these gates.
Matteo looks at me again, so intensely that I can feel his gaze physically now. But itâs not heat. Itâs a stare that burns, cuts, and wants to see me broken, crawling, hopeless. A stare meant to crush and dominate, but he should know by now it doesnât work on me.
It never has.
âIf I do this⊠if I get close to Enzo Bianchi and find out what heâs hiding, youâll let me walk free?â
Cesare only narrows his eyes.
âCan I really buy my freedom if I do this job for you?â
I insist, staring into those predatory amber eyes, that look like theyâre considering killing me right now for daring to question his word.
After all, nothing in the underworld matters more than a manâs word. Especially for a Romano, who lives for honor, loyalty, and his own twisted sense of justice.
âIf I do it⊠Youâll really let me leave the Famiglia?â
