Chapter 2 The End

Fatter than life itself. The words pierced through my soul like spikes. Gabriel Bowen had never had a problem with me being a plus sized woman. He made me understand he adored me the way I was. 

“I love mine thick.” He said on our first date. Where was this coming from ? When did I move from being his ideal woman to a shadow of a woman?

“You stopped trying,” he said. “You got comfortable. You buried yourself in that kitchen, in your little baking business, and forgot everything else.”

My breath caught. “My little—”

“You used to have ambition, Nicole ,” he continued, his tone almost clinical now. “You had goals. Law. A career. Something more. But somewhere along the way, you just… settled.”

The word settled echoed in my head. “I settled,” I repeated slowly, my eyes stinging now. “For you.”

I walked to where he was sitting. “I gave up those opportunities because you needed support,” I said, my voice cracking despite my  effort. “Because we were building something together. Or at least, I thought we were.”

Gabriel didn’t respond.

I swallowed hard, nodding as I finally realized he was just making excuses to dump me. God forbid I begged a man for his attention again. I had had my fair share of the pain. 

The constant begging for attention, the constant begging for him to do basic things like touch me, listen to me or even lend me a hand when I needed one. I was done with all of that.

“You’re right about one thing though” I said. He glanced at me.

“This marriage isn’t working” I said.

He exhaled, almost relieved that I said that. “Then let’s not drag it out any further.”

I held his gaze, then for the first time that evening I let out a smile. 

You want a divorce?” I said. “Fine.”

Gabriel  blinked, clearly not expecting the ease in my agreement, but I wasn’t done.

“But let’s be very clear about something.”

I took a step closer.

“You don’t get to walk away from this thinking you won.”

A flicker of confusion crossed his face, I  tilted my head slightly, studying him as if memorizing the man who had just destroyed my life.

“You think I settled?” I continued softly. “You think I stopped growing?”

“Then you don’t know me at all.” My smile deepened.

Gabriel frowned. “Nicole —”

“No,” I cut in, my  voice suddenly firm. “You don’t get to interrupt me anymore.”

“Go ahead,” I said, stepping back now, gesturing toward the couch he had been reaching for earlier. “Sit. Rest. Do whatever helps you feel comfortable.”

“Because this—” I added quietly “—is the last time you’ll ever see me Gabriel Bowen.”

I needed to have said that. How dare he cheat on me and then go ahead and ask for a divorce like he had been doing me a favor all this time? 

“All this time… I thought we were building something together,” I continued, shaking my head. “I thought the sacrifices meant something. That I meant something.”

I took a step back staring at him like I was seeing him for the first time. He actually turned out to be worse than my ex Alex. I was lucky I didn’t marry that bastard but now I realized I ended up with the devil’s real advocate.

I met Gabriel the night Alex cheated on me. I had gone out to drink myself to death. I guess I should have listened to what people say about relationships that start in a club.

Gabriel was an angel in our early years together. He made me understand that he had no problems with my size. 

His younger sister Melanie had upfront called me a fatty pig when he first introduced me to his family. They never liked me, not because I was not worthy of their son but because I was a plus size Caucasian woman.

Gabriel’s parents were straight up racists. We got married despite their unacceptance and Gabriel told me he was going to fight the world to hell and back just for me. 

Everything started falling apart last year. He started complaining about my weight and how puffy my face was. He stopped taking me to his company functions. He wouldn’t even follow me to the supermarket to shop groceries like we did before.

I didn’t consider it as anything to be worried about. All my life, I have been a plus sized woman for as long as I could remember.

Despite all the bullying right from elementary school to college, I graduated with a first class degree in Law. I had an undying love for baking, so I decided to start a pastry business instead of pursuing law.

After my messy breakup with Alex, I decided to pursue a career in law but Gabriel told me to concentrate on my restaurant as he saw more potential in it than a career in law. I listened to the idiot, I believed him. 

Everything was clear now, he said I settled? I settled because he asked me to. He had asked me to throw out all my law books which I did. 

Now I fully understand he didn’t want a woman who could build a career better than his . His company was still striving even after three years of hard work. 

He walked towards the front door “I am not going to stand here and argue about the past.” He said.

“This marriage isn’t working, dragging it out won’t change that. I will be away for a while, my lawyer will contact you tomorrow.” He banged the door after him.