Sweetest Pain

Irene’s Point of View

My mate was finally coming home.

So why did my chest feel so tight?

I stood at the entrance of the Hellfire Pack, trying to steady my breathing. My fingers felt cold, even though the sun was high above us.

Luna Lorraine stood beside me. Alpha Dave was on her other side.

Behind us, the pack had gathered.

Families. Friends. Children clinging to their parents.

But no one laughed.

No one spoke too loudly.

The air was heavy.

Filled with hope… and something else I couldn’t name.

Everyone was waiting for the same thing.

For their loved ones to return alive.

“I see them!”

Luna Lorraine’s voice broke as she grabbed my hand.

I turned to her.

Her eyes were already wet, shining with relief.

And just like that… mine followed.

My vision blurred.

My heart pounded too fast. Too hard.

I was happy.

I should have been nothing but happy.

But something inside me… wouldn’t calm down.

Luna Lorraine squeezed my hand tighter, grounding me. Holding me in place.

For months, I had waited.

Wondered.

Prayed.

I begged the Moon Goddess to bring Eugene back to me.

And now,

he was here.

We were about to see each other again.

I swallowed hard, my throat tight.

Yes.

I was his mate.

The one chosen for him.

The one who stayed. The one who waited.

Today wasn’t just about warriors returning.

It was my day too.

The day I would stand beside him…

as the next Luna.

“I see them too, Mom,” I whispered.

My voice came out soft. Unsteady.

I tightened my grip on her hand.

We stood there together, caught in the same rush of emotion.

Relief.

Joy.

And something warm… slowly spreading in my chest.

Like I finally belonged.

I used to have nothing.

No family.

No home.

Just silence.

But Luna Lorraine changed that.

The first time she told me to call her “Mom”…

something inside me broke,

and healed at the same time.

For the first time in my life,

I had someone.

Something real.

And then I met Eugene.

Everything changed.

The moment our eyes met…

we both knew.

We were meant to be.

“There! It’s Eugene!”

My voice trembled as I pointed ahead.

The sunlight burned behind the returning warriors, stretching their shadows across the ground.

And there he was.

At the front.

Leading them.

Strong.

Alive.

Real.

My breath caught,

and for a second…

nothing else in the world existed.

My chest tightened even more.

I wanted to run to him.

To throw myself into his arms.

To hold him…

and never let go.

But as I stared at him, something twisted deep inside my chest.

And this time,

it didn’t feel like happiness.

One year.

A full year without him.

It felt longer than that.

Like time had stretched, just to test how much I could endure.

He left too soon after we met.

Before we had the chance to become real.

After that…

all we had were letters.

Words on paper.

Carefully written.

Carefully read.

That was all I held on to.

Each letter kept me going.

Each one reminded me,

he was still mine.

It wasn’t easy.

Some nights felt too long.

Too quiet.

But I believed in us.

At least…

that was what I kept telling myself.

Now he was here.

Right in front of me.

Closer than he had been in a year.

My heart raced.

Too fast.

Too uneven.

That same sharp feeling returned, pressing into my chest.

Something wasn’t right.

I felt it.

But I pushed it down.

I didn’t want to ruin this moment.

All I wanted was him.

To see his face.

To hear his voice again.

To feel his arms around me.

But I didn’t move.

I couldn’t.

Everyone was watching.

This wasn’t just a reunion.

I was the future Luna.

I had to act properly.

Stay calm.

Stay composed.

No matter how badly I wanted to run to him.

The warriors drew closer.

Step by step.

Closer.

Closer.

Then,

Eugene got off his horse.

My breath caught.

This was it.

But…

he didn’t look at me.

Not even once.

He walked right past me.

Like I wasn’t even there.

Like I wasn’t there.

He walked straight past me.

Not a pause. Not a glance.

Straight to Alpha Dave.

“My mission is complete,” he said.

His voice was steady. Calm. Controlled.

“I’m proud of you,” Alpha Dave replied, pulling him into a tight hug.

Then,

the world broke open.

Cheers burst around us.

The crowd surged forward.

Families ran to each other, crying, laughing, holding on like they might lose each other again if they let go.

“Mother!”

Eugene’s voice cut through everything.

Luna Lorraine’s hand slipped from mine.

She didn’t hesitate.

She ran to him.

Tears streamed down her face as she wrapped her arms around him.

“I missed you… I missed you so much…”

She said it again. And again.

Like she couldn’t stop.

Like she needed to hear it out loud to believe he was really there.

I stayed where I was.

Still.

Watching.

Waiting.

Just… waiting.

For him to turn.

To look at me.

To see me.

But he didn’t.

Not once.

And slowly,

something cold spread through my chest.

The world around me faded.

The cheers.

The laughter.

The joy.

All of it slipped away.

Until there was nothing left,

except the sound of my heartbeat.

Too loud.

Too fast.

Too wrong.

I told myself this was the end of it.

No more waiting.

No more letters.

No more nights staring at nothing, hoping he would come back.

He was here.

My mate.

We were supposed to start our life now.

…weren’t we?

But as I stood there,

watching him hold everyone else,

that certainty started to break.

When it was finally my turn, I stepped forward.

Slowly.

My arms opened on their own.

Ready.

Ready to hold him.

Ready to feel something real after a year of waiting.

But,

Eugene stepped back.

Not just a step.

A clear distance.

Like I didn’t belong near him.

Like I was a stranger.

Like he didn’t know me at all.

He turned his face away.

My heart,

stopped.

My arms dropped slowly to my sides.

For a moment, I forgot how to move.

How to breathe.

How to exist in that space.

This wasn’t real.

It couldn’t be.

And yet,

he didn’t look back.

This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.

I bit my lip, hard enough to hurt.

Anything to keep the tears in.

Not here.

Not in front of everyone.

Eugene gave me a small nod.

Cold.

Distant.

Like I didn’t matter.

The pain hit all at once.

Sharp. Heavy.

Why…?

Why was he acting like this?

“I… I’m so happy to see you,” I said.

My voice came out soft. Thin.

Almost like it didn’t belong to me.

I stepped back quickly and moved beside Luna Lorraine.

I turned my face slightly.

I didn’t want them to see.

Didn’t want anyone to see how much it hurt.

“I’m happy to be back,” Eugene replied.

Flat.

Empty.

The words hurt.

But it was his eyes that cut deeper.

They met mine for a second.

Just one.

And in that moment…

something flickered.

Pain.

Guilt.

Or maybe… regret.

Then it was gone.

He looked away,

like I was nothing.

My chest tightened again.

Then,

he reached behind him.

And took someone’s hand.

My breath caught.

There was a woman standing just behind him.

I hadn’t noticed her before.

All I saw was him.

But now…

I couldn’t look away.

Long red hair fell over her shoulders.

Smooth. Shining.

Her blue eyes were bright.

Sharp.

She was beautiful.

Too beautiful.

My stomach twisted.

Something cold spread through me.

Slow.

Deep.

Eugene pulled her closer.

Their hands stayed linked.

Tight.

Like letting go wasn’t an option.

Something inside me,

cracked.

“Father. Mother. This is the woman I mentioned in my letter,” Eugene said.

He still didn’t look at me.

Not once.

A woman?

My mind went blank.

A letter?

What letter?

I searched my memory, desperate.

Every word.

Every page.

Every line he had ever sent me.

But there was nothing.

No mention.

No hint.

He never told me about her.

Not even once.

“Who… is she?”

The question slipped out before I could stop it.

My voice trembled.

Luna Lorraine’s hand tightened around mine.

And somehow,

that made everything feel worse.

Her grip was gentle.

But it didn’t feel like comfort anymore.

It felt like a warning.

And I didn’t know which part of me was about to break first,

my heart…

or everything I believed in.

But firm.

I looked at Luna Lorraine.

She gave me a soft, sad smile.

The kind that didn’t comfort.

The kind that said… she already knew.

“Let’s go back to the pack house first,” she said quietly. “We’ll talk later. Eugene must be tired.”

Her voice was warm.

It used to calm me.

But not this time.

Not anymore.

I nodded anyway.

What else could I do?

Each step forward felt wrong.

Like I was walking away from something I didn’t understand… but should.

Before we left,

I turned back.

Just once.

Eugene was still there.

His head lowered.

His face… heavy with something I couldn’t name.

Shame.

Maybe.

Alpha Dave stood in front of him.

His expression was sharp.

Hard.

Angry.

The pride from earlier,

gone.

“What is going on…?” I whispered.

The words barely left my lips.

My thoughts tangled together, refusing to settle.

Why was he holding her hand?

Why wouldn’t he look at me?

Why did it feel like everything had just… broken?

“Mother… who is that woman?” I asked again.

My voice trembled.

But Luna Lorraine didn’t answer.

She only tightened her grip on my hand,

and led me away.

Back to the pack house.

There was supposed to be a celebration tonight.

A welcome party for the warriors who made it home.

But tomorrow,

there would be a funeral.

For the ones who never returned.

And somehow…

it felt like I had lost something too.

“We will talk about this later,” Luna Lorraine said again.

But this time,

her voice felt heavier.

Too heavy.

Something was wrong.

I could feel it deep inside me.

Something was being hidden.

Something important.

And whatever it was,

it was already breaking me.