Dictated Moans

The sun shone brightly. The heat hit the students right where they thought no sun should reach. It was the end of the semester and everybody was bursting with energy. They had two months to rest and most of them vowed to do wild things.

Cassie, Emily, and Sarah spilled out of the humanities building together, laughing and drunk on relief. The final exams were over and they were excited. They hadn't realized that PHD was a bit more technical than Masters or degree, but it didn't matter because soon enough,after their internships and thesis defense, they would get to be called doctors.

“I’m never reading another footnote as long as I live.” Emily said as she walked with a jump.

"But you haven't finished or defended your thesis yet," Cassie reminded her politely.

"It can't be harder than my Masters thesis,"Emily replied with a wink. "I swear we are going out, and I am going to drink myself silly."

Sarah fanned herself with a piece of paper. “Speak for yourself. I’m going straight home, face-planting into my pillow, and not moving until Monday.”

"Nop, we are going out. We must grind and twerk on some brainless men with muscles and tattoos before we get back to serious internship business. I need to be laid sooo bad." She was serious. Sarah tried to protest but Emily could hear none of it.

Cassie just smiled, quiet as always, letting the moment wash over her. The weight that had sat on her chest for months had finally lifted and she felt lighter.

They walked towards the iron gates at the edge of campus. Emily hooked an arm through Cassie’s. “So. Summer plans. Hit me.”

“Silicon Valley,” Sarah said, practically glowing. “Tech start-up. Unlimited LaCroix. Bean bags. The whole cliché.”

Emily snorted. “I’m going back to the marketing agency, but this time I’m demanding the social-media department. Someone has to get paid to doomscroll for a living. Man, I have been doing donkey work in class.”

Both pairs of eyes swung to Cassie.

She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “I… don’t actually have anything lined up yet, but I'll definitely get something. I'll talk to my brother about it.”

Emily’s grin turned predatory. “Perfect.”

Sarah groaned. “Here we go.”

Emily stopped dead in the middle of the path, forcing a river of students to part around them. “Cassandra Marie Ellis, you are turning twenty six this year and you have never put your legs on someone's shoulder. Nop, nop, nop.”

Cassie’s cheeks flushed red like tomatoes, “Emily...”

“No, no, hear me out.” Emily’s voice dropped into the dangerous volume that meant someone was about to have their life changed whether they liked it or not. “We are fixing this. This weekend. You are getting under someone, sitting on their faces till you squirt...”

Sarah’s mouth formed a perfect O. “You’re not seriously suggesting...”

“A dare,” Emily finished, eyes sparkling like broken glass. “By Monday morning, Cassie will no longer be a virgin. If she succeeds, we buy her the most expensive steak dinner in the city and throw in a spa day. If she fails…” Emily’s gaze slid to the delicate crystal globe necklace resting against Cassie’s collarbone; her grandmother’s last gift, the one thing she never took off. “That beauty becomes mine.”

Cassie’s hand flew instinctively to the pendant. “You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.”

Sarah whistled low. “That’s cold, Em.”

“That’s motivation,” Emily corrected.

Cassie’s pulse hammered in her throat. Two years ago, her college boyfriend had smiled sweetly for nine months into their relationship, said he respected her choice to wait… and then slept with his lab partner the same week. Cassie hadn’t cried for long. She’d thrown herself into her master’s thesis, told herself the right man would appear when the time was perfect.

But perfection was taking its sweet time.

And twenty six was starting to feel like a neon sign flashing “still waiting” above her head.

Emily extended her pinky, the same way she had when they were eighteen and swearing they’d all lose their virginity before graduation, a promise only Cassie had failed to keep.

“Rules are simple,” Emily said. “You choose the man. You choose the place. No names required. No strings. One weekend to get fucked into oblivion. Leg+shaking orgasms and all.”

Sarah leaned in, voice teasing but kind. "I could hook you up with my former study mate. A quiet guy, looks steady and is intelligent."

"John?" Cassie asked.

"Yeah. John Mark. A perfect gentleman. And I know he'll take it slow since it will be your first time," Sarah answered.

"Nop. John is boring as hell. Cassie needs her first time to be unforgettable. She needs to licked senseless till she is begging for mercy from the angels, not some polite dude who is going to offer polite sex, tweaking her nipple like he's searching for a TV station," Emily rambled as they walked home.

"Emily!" Sarah shouted.

"What? I am right and you guys know it. John is not it. No hooking her up Sarah, let her find her own man. She's capable and intelligent," Emily said with a wink.

"You are shameless," Sarah jokingly pushed her shoulders.

"But you love me all the same." Emily wiggled her pinky. “So, deal or no deal?”

Cassie thought of every romance novel she’d devoured in secret, every late-night fantasy she’d never admitted out loud. She thought of the way her own heartbeat felt like a caged thing lately, begging to be let out.

She thought: Maybe there is no right person. 

Maybe I just have to be brave enough to take what I want.

Cassie hooked her pinky through Emily’s. “Deal.”

Sarah whooped. Emily cackled like a villain who’d just signed her own victory speech.

Cassie felt energized. She was done waiting for permission. By Monday morning, the girl walking out of these gates would be gone. And the woman replacing her would be untouchable.

She tightened her grip on Emily’s finger, sealing the pact.

Emily’s eyes went wide with delight. “That’s my girl.”

Sarah slung an arm around Cassie’s shoulders, "I hope you win. Besides the orgasms, I wouldn't want Emily to get that beautiful pendant. She wouldn't let you forget it of she does." 

"Thank you. I plan on winning." Cassie said with a shy smile.

Cassie smiled, slow and secret.

She couldn’t wait to ruin it.