I want to chill. Why do men keep falling for me?!

I want to chill. Why do men keep falling for me?!

Ilya Kazimir · Ongoing · 91.7k Words

1.1k
Hot
1.1k
Views
0
Added
Add to Shelf
Start Reading
Share:facebooktwitterpinterestwhatsappreddit

Introduction

At thirty-five, I finally die— only to wake up as Isabella Montague, the stunning heroine of a fantasy novel I wrote as a stupid teen.

My plan? A world-class retirement involving heavy naps and bottomless snacks.

But the 'perfect' men I created are ruining the plan.

The brooding Northern Duke won't stop watching me. The Golden Prince is convinced my disinterest is actually a challenge. My knight—and best friend—is ready to burn the world down if I so much as yawn. And a certain Elven noble who swore off humans keeps finding excuses to be near my tea.

They want my heart. I just want my pillow.

Too bad the world is cursed, the Queen wants me dead, and everyone keeps trying to put me on a throne I never asked for.

Can't a girl just chill?

Chapter 1

“Watch where you’re walking, bitch!”

Those are the words that wake Maeve from the slumber she’s in. Her high heels hurt from how long she’s been walking and she’s completely drenched by the rain falling on her. 

And there’s a car that almost ran over her body a tiny little inch away from her thigh. 

She stares at it, her brain numbing from the entire scenery happening. 

“Hey!” She hears a door slamming… the owner of the car, probably. He comes out, and he’s a chubby male with an ugly looking bear as he yells, “I don’t know what fucking problem you got with me, ugly lady, but beat it, okay?! I’m not gonna take you to any fucking hospitals. I don’t owe you shit!”

Ugly. Ah. Yes. Maeve knew that already. 

She had a very plain face. And maybe… maybe she had not taken better care of her body in the recent days that had passed. It wasn’t her fault though. There was already so little she could have done. 

Her job was 9-9. She barely made enough to make rent. To survive rent. All she did was… she didn’t even fucking know. 

So, yes, she smelled a bit and she looked ugly and tired. She didn’t know how her boyfriend chose her… but now, after seeing him humping her coworker… perhaps, he never did. 

“Sorry,” Her own voice doesn’t sound like hers but she doesn’t care. She sounds numb and feels hollow as she walks away, hearing the man yelling more obscene words at her. 

When she gets to the sidewalks, she finds a bench and pulls out her phone. 

She needs help. 

Maeve hands shake as she types in her siblings' names, trying to call each of them. The first one doesn’t go through. The second, she doesn’t try to call because she knows she is blocked. The third, she knows would only pick to yell at her. The fifth is her last option. “Hey, Johnny—”

“I really don’t have any more money to lend to you,” 

She can hear the revulsion in his voice. The way he makes it clear that her presence was pointless and useless— and she knows he wishes she is dead. “I’m not calling for money, silly. I just… I just thought that maybe we should sit together, you know? Maybe have a drink once in a while?”

“Don’t you have like a million dollar debt to settle?” She hears him snort and scoff at the same tone. Her chest begins to hurt as she clenches her phone tighter while he continues, “God, you really are so pathetic. Look, you sold our family house, and could barely do what you needed to do as the oldest sister. You disgust me. And Jesus Christ, can’t you take more care of yourself? I don’t even know how your boyfriend stands you. You’re ugly, you’re stupid too, and you genuinely bring nothing but bad luck. That’s why the rest of us don’t talk to you. This is the last time we’re talking. Are we clear?”

And then he hangs up. 

Maeve stares at her screen, watching it till her phone dies before a small sigh leaves her lips, “Ah. You too, huh?”

The rain falls even harder, soaking her body even more as she lets her head rest backwards on the bench. 

She can feel the cold seeping into her skin, feeling the way she was certain that her heart was going to stop. 

But Maeve finds her way back home. 

She finds her way to the chair she places right underneath her fan with the rope on her hand, climbing it slowly as she drips wet, trying to be careful before her laptop flashed the words, “File Name: Every Man Wants Me. Want to read the file?”

Maeve stares at the story she wrote when she was sixteen and believed life could be better, a story she wrote when she thought that things would be better if she just hung on a bit longer, just… pretended that everything could be alright. 

A book about a girl called Isabella Montague who was naive and clumsy in a world where women ruled and men stood below them. A world where a woman like her could be free to do and choose whatever she truly wanted without worrying about the consequences. 

How stupid of her. 

She scoffs as she turns away, her hands about to place the noose of the rope around her neck before she sees a flash of red… red eyes and black hair. The person appears right beside her, kicking the legs of the chair. 

It all happens so fast. 

One second, she’s on the chair, and the other? She’s falling over, the sound of the clock ticking loudly around her before she reaches the ground, her head hitting the ground—

And then she blacks out. 

“Humans,” The strange being next to her says as it moves to her laptop, his eyes scanning the file. “Cowards of the highest order, I believe,”

It’s eyes move to Maeve who’s still unconscious on the floor before it turns back to the laptop and presses the word, “YES,”

Instantly, the laptop glitches, words scrambling across the screen before it suddenly goes black then forms the words, “WELCOME, AUTHOR,”

Then after another second, “AND GOODBYE,”

Last Chapters

You Might Like 😍

Omega Bound

Omega Bound

1.3m Views · Completed · Veronica White
Ayla Frost is a beautiful, rare omega. Kidnapped, tortured, and trafficked to rogue clans and corrupt alphas to do with as they pleased.  Kept alive in her cage, broken and abandoned by her wolf, she becomes mute and has given up on hope for a better life until one explosion changes everything. 

Thane Knight is the alpha of the Midnight Pack of the La Plata Mountain Range, the largest wolf shifter pack in the world. He is an alpha by day and hunts the shifter trafficking ring with his group of mercenaries by night. His hunt for vengeance leads to one raid that changes his life. 

Tropes:
Touch her and die/Slow burn romance/Fated Mates/Found family twist/Close circle betrayal/Cinnamon roll for only her/Traumatized heroine/Rare wolf/Hidden powers/Knotting/Nesting/Heats/Luna/Attempted assassination
The Prison Project

The Prison Project

963.7k Views · Ongoing · Bethany Donaghy
The government's newest experiment in criminal rehabilitation - sending thousands of young women to live alongside some of the most dangerous men held behind bars...

Can love tame the untouchable? Or will it only fuel the fire and cause chaos amongst the inmates?

Fresh out of high school and suffocating in her dead-end hometown, Margot longs for her escape. Her reckless best friend, Cara, thinks she's found the perfect way out for them both - The Prisoner Project - a controversial program offering a life-changing sum of money in exchange for time spent with maximum-security inmates.

Without hesitation, Cara rushes to sign them up.

Their reward? A one-way ticket into the depths of a prison ruled by gang leaders, mob bosses, and men the guards wouldn't even dare to cross...

At the centre of it all, meets Coban Santorelli - a man colder than ice, darker than midnight, and as deadly as the fire that fuels his inner rage. He knows that the project may very well be his only ticket to freedom - his only ticket to revenge on the one who managed to lock him up and so he must prove that he can learn to love…

Will Margot be the lucky one chosen to help reform him?

Will Coban be capable of bringing something to the table other than just sex?

What starts off as denial may very well grow in to obsession which could then fester in to becoming true love…

A temperamental romance novel.
Alpha Nicholas's Little Mate

Alpha Nicholas's Little Mate

853.4k Views · Ongoing · Becky j
"Mate is here!"
What? No—wait… oh Moon Goddess, no.
Please tell me you're joking, Lex.
But she's not. I can feel her excitement bubbling under my skin, while all I feel is dread.
We turn the corner, and the scent hits me like a punch to the chest—cinnamon and something impossibly warm. My eyes scan the room until they land on him. Tall. Commanding. Beautiful.
And then, just as quickly… he sees me.
His expression twists.
"Fuck no."
He turns—and runs.
My mate sees me and runs.
Bonnie has spent her entire life being broken down and abused by the people closest to her including her very own twin sister. Alongside her best friend Lilly who also lives a life of hell, they plan to run away while attending the biggest ball of the year while it's being hosted by another pack, only things don't quite go to plan leaving both girls feeling lost and unsure about their futures.
Alpha Nicholas is 28, mateless, and has no plans to change that. It's his turn to host the annual Blue Moon Ball this year and the last thing he expects is to find his mate. What he expects even less is for his mate to be 10 years younger than him and how his body reacts to her. While he tries to refuse to acknowledge that he has met his mate his world is turned upside down after guards catch two she-wolves running through his lands.
Once they are brought to him he finds himself once again facing his mate and discovers that she's hiding secrets that will make him want to kill more than one person.
Can he overcome his feelings towards having a mate and one that is so much younger than him? Will his mate want him after already feeling the sting of his unofficial rejection? Can they both work on letting go of the past and moving forward together or will fate have different plans and keep them apart?
Surrendering to Destiny

Surrendering to Destiny

668.4k Views · Completed · Allison Franklin
Catherine is not only a rogue half-breed, she is also the result of mate-bond infidelity, was abandoned as a baby and, to top it off, she can only shift during the full moon. When Catherine left the only pack she'd ever known in order to escape the new alpha, the last thing she expected was to find her mate... let alone for him to be the mouth-watering, heavily tattooed, lead warrior of the most feared lycan pack on the continent.

Graham MacTavish wasn't prepared to find his mate in the small town of Sterling that borders the Blackmoore Packlands. He certainly didn't expect her to be a rogue, half-breed who smelled of Alpha blood. With her multi-colored eyes, there was no stopping him from falling hard the moment their mate bond snapped into place. He would do anything to claim her, protect her and cherish her no matter the cost.

From vengeful ex-lovers, pack politics, species prejudice, hidden plots, magic, kidnapping, poisoning, rogue attacks, and a mountain of secrets including Catherine's true parentage there is no shortage of things trying to tear the two apart.

Despite the hardships, a burning desire and willingness to trust will help forge a strong bond between the two... but no bond is unbreakable. When the secrets kept close to heart are slowly revealed, will the two be able to weather the storm? Or will the gift bestowed upon Catherine by the moon goddess be too insurmountable to overcome?
The mafia princess return

The mafia princess return

677.3k Views · Completed · Tonje Unosen
Talia have been living with her mother, stepsister and Stepfather for years. One day she finally get away from them. Suddenly she learn she have more family out there and she have many people that actually love her, something she have never felt before! At least not as she can remember. She have to learn to trust others, get her new brothers to accept her for who she is!
Invisible To Her Bully

Invisible To Her Bully

356.4k Views · Ongoing · sunsationaldee
Unlike her twin brother, Jackson, Jessa struggled with her weight and very few friends. Jackson was an athlete and the epitome of popularity, while Jessa felt invisible. Noah was the quintessential “It” guy at school—charismatic, well-liked, and undeniably handsome. To make matters worse, he was Jackson’s best friend and Jessa’s biggest bully. During their senior year, Jessa decides it was time for her to gain some self-confidence, find her true beauty and not be the invisible twin. As Jessa transformed, she begins to catch the eye of everyone around her, especially Noah. Noah, initially blinded by his perception of Jessa as merely Jackson’s sister, started to see her in a new light. How did she become the captivating woman invading his thoughts? When did she become the object of his fantasies? Join Jessa on her journey from being the class joke to a confident, desirable young woman, surprising even Noah as she reveals the incredible person she has always been inside.
Shattered Girl

Shattered Girl

819.7k Views · Completed · Brandi Rae
Jake's fingers danced across my nipples, squeezing gently and making me groan in pleasure. He lifted my shirt and stared at my hardened nipples through my bra. I tensed, and Jake sat up and moved back on the bed, giving me some space.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. Was that too much?” I could see the worry in his eyes as I took a deep breath.

“I just didn’t want you to see all my scars,” I whispered, feeling ashamed of my marked body.


Emmy Nichols is used to surviving. She survived her abusive father for years until he beat her so severely, she ended up in the hospital, and her father was finally arrested. Now, Emmy is thrown into a life she never expected. Now she has a mother

who doesn't want her, a politically motivated stepfather with ties to the Irish mob, four older stepbrothers, and their best friend who swear to love and protect her. Then, one night, everything shatters, and Emmy feels her only option is to run.

When her stepbrothers and their best friend finally find her, will they pick up the pieces and convince Emmy that they will keep her safe and their love will hold them together?
The Pack: Rule Number 1 - No Mates

The Pack: Rule Number 1 - No Mates

1.8m Views · Ongoing · Jaylee
Soft hot lips find the shell of my ear and he whispers, "You think I don't want you?" He pushes his hips forward, grinding into the back of my ass and I groan. "Really?" He chuckles.

"Let me go," I whimper, my body trembling with need. "I don't want you touching me."

I fall forward onto the bed then turn around to stare at him. The dark tattoos of Domonic's chiseled shoulders, quiver and and expand with the heave of his chest. His deep dimpled smile is full of arrogance as he reaches behind himself to lock the door.

Biting his lip, he stalks toward me, his hand going to the seam of his pants and the thickening bulge there.

"Are you sure you don't want me to touch you?" He whispers, untying the knot and slipping a hand inside. "Because I swear to God, that is all I have been wanting to do. Every single day from the moment you stepped in our bar and I smelled your perfect flavor from across the room."


New to the world of shifters, Draven is human on the run. A beautiful girl who no one could protect. Domonic is the cold Alpha of the Red Wolf Pack. A brotherhood of twelve wolves that live by twelve rules. Rules which they vowed could NEVER be broken.

Especially - Rule Number One - No Mates

When Draven meets Domonic, he knows that she is his mate, but Draven has no idea what a mate is, only that she has fallen in love with a shifter. An Alpha that will break her heart to make her leave. Promising herself, she will never forgive him, she disappears.

But she doesn’t know about the child she’s carrying or that the moment she left, Domonic decided rules were made to be broken - and now will he ever find her again? Will she forgive him?
The War God Alpha's Arranged Bride

The War God Alpha's Arranged Bride

537.8k Views · Ongoing · Riley Above Story
On the day Evelyn thought Liam would propose, he shocked her by getting down on one knee—for her stepsister, Samantha. As if that betrayal wasn’t enough, Evelyn learned the cruel truth: her parents had already decided to sell one daughter’s future to a dangerous man: the infamous War God Alpha Alexander, who was rumored to be scarred and crippled after a recent accident. And the bride could’t be their precious daughter Samantha. However, when the "ugly and crippled" Alpha revealed his true self—an impossibly handsome billionaire with no trace of injury—Samantha had a change of heart. She was ready to dump Liam and take Evelyn's place as the family daughter who should marry Alexander.
Yet Alexander made his decision clear to the world: “Evelyn is the only woman I will ever marry.”
I Slapped My Fiancé—Then Married His Billionaire Nemesis

I Slapped My Fiancé—Then Married His Billionaire Nemesis

425.5k Views · Completed · Jessica C. Dolan
Being second best is practically in my DNA. My sister got the love, the attention, the spotlight. And now, even her damn fiancé.
Technically, Rhys Granger was my fiancé now—billionaire, devastatingly hot, and a walking Wall Street wet dream. My parents shoved me into the engagement after Catherine disappeared, and honestly? I didn’t mind. I’d crushed on Rhys for years. This was my chance, right? My turn to be the chosen one?
Wrong.
One night, he slapped me. Over a mug. A stupid, chipped, ugly mug my sister gave him years ago. That’s when it hit me—he didn’t love me. He didn’t even see me. I was just a warm-bodied placeholder for the woman he actually wanted. And apparently, I wasn’t even worth as much as a glorified coffee cup.
So I slapped him right back, dumped his ass, and prepared for disaster—my parents losing their minds, Rhys throwing a billionaire tantrum, his terrifying family plotting my untimely demise.
Obviously, I needed alcohol. A lot of alcohol.
Enter him.
Tall, dangerous, unfairly hot. The kind of man who makes you want to sin just by existing. I’d met him only once before, and that night, he just happened to be at the same bar as my drunk, self-pitying self. So I did the only logical thing: I dragged him into a hotel room and ripped off his clothes.
It was reckless. It was stupid. It was completely ill-advised.
But it was also: Best. Sex. Of. My. Life.
And, as it turned out, the best decision I’d ever made.
Because my one-night stand isn’t just some random guy. He’s richer than Rhys, more powerful than my entire family, and definitely more dangerous than I should be playing with.
And now, he’s not letting me go.
Oops, Wrong Girl to Bully

Oops, Wrong Girl to Bully

198.4k Views · Completed · Xena Kessler
An original story by Xena Kessler
My back hit the desk. Pain exploded through my skull.
"Girls like you don't get to dream about guys like Kai." Bella's breath was hot on my face. "You don't get to write pathetic love letters."
She shoved me again. Harder.
"Maybe if you weren't such a desperate little—"
I fell. My head cracked against the corner.
Warmth trickled down my neck. Blood.
Their laughter turned to gasps.
The door slammed.
I tried to stand. Couldn't. The room was spinning, fading to black.
Someone... please...
Angelina, the most powerful Alpha who conquered forty-nine packs, dies in a yacht explosion—only to wake up as Aria Sterling, a fifteen-year-old Omega's daughter who just died from bullying.
The original Aria's life was a nightmare. Humiliated when golden boy Kai Matthews posted her love letter online, then shoved to death by his girlfriend Bella Morrison. But that's not all her family faces:
"You got until Monday," the tattooed gangster sneered at Aria's mother. "Ten grand cash. Or I'm taking collateral—your kids' organs fetch top dollar. That pretty daughter of yours? She could make us money another way too."
Now Angelina's lethal combat skills awaken in this fragile body. No more hiding. No more fear.
Armed with an Alpha's ruthlessness and a mysterious blood-red pendant, she'll dismantle everyone who hurt this family—one calculated move at a time.
Thornhill Academy

Thornhill Academy

137.2k Views · Completed · Sheridan Hartin
Allison was never meant to survive. She was born a siphon and hidden away like a mistake the world was waiting to break. The Council planned to shape her into a weapon or erase her before she became one. She was supposed to disappear quietly; another tragedy folded into the past. Instead, she lived, she thrived. When the truth of her bloodline comes to light, Allison’s carefully held world fractures, and power spills through the cracks whether she’s ready for it or not. She steals the magic she needs. She survives the way she has learnt. Everything is fine until she captured from the scrub lands and four men begin to orbit her life; each bound by something deeper than choice. Five men. Five obsessions. Five hearts tethered to hers by magic older than the Wall itself.

Hunted, haunted, and newly awakened, Allison is dragged into a rebellion built on blood and belief, the same fight her parents died trying to protect. As enemies close in and desire sharpens into something dangerous, she must decide what kind of power she will become. The weapon the Council always wanted. Or the storm that tears their world apart. When Allison rises, kingdoms kneel and when she loves, she loves like war.

Dark Academia | Reverse Harem | Dark Romance | Dark Humour | Action-Packed | Steamy | Unputdownable