Secretary, Do You Want to Sleep With Me?

By Valeria

I had been working at Zalco Company for six months when I was called to the HR office. I went immediately; there were three days left before my probationary contract expired. I had two options: I would either become a permanent employee or be let go. Honestly, I had no clue what would happen. I had never had any issues with anyone, my job was simple, so I made no mistakes, and it was well-paid.

I could afford to rent an apartment with two other friends, eat every day, travel, buy clothes, and go out occasionally.

I had quite a bit of clothing, as I needed to dress elegantly and fairly formally for work.

It wasn't the kind of clothing I used to wear to college and definitely not for going out, although many times I stayed late at work and couldn't stop by the apartment to change, going straight from work to college.

I announced myself to the head of HR's secretary.

I was really nervous, I can't deny it. I didn't want to lose my job because that would mean going back to my parents' house, and I didn't want to do that. Not because of them, but because it would mean constantly seeing my ex-boyfriend.

We lived two blocks apart.

I believed he was the love of my life and that I was the love of his.

When we started dating, I was 16 and he was 20.

My parents didn't agree with me having a boyfriend at such a young age.

They said I would lose my teenage years next to someone who might not be worth it.

I didn't understand their reasons.

The first year was all roses, although I drifted away from my friends.

The second year, when I finished high school, wasn't the same as the first.

Many times he went out with his friends, and I didn't want to go out with mine. I had few left.

I was always at home.

When I had to go on a graduation trip with my classmates, I did it because my parents forced me, saying they had been paying for the trip for two years and it was too much money to waste.

Now I regret not having enjoyed that trip as I should have.

When I came back, after 10 days of absence, I found out that some acquaintances had seen my boyfriend several times kissing a girl from the neighborhood with a dubious reputation.

He didn't deny it; he just told me that I had abandoned him to go partying and that, in any case, he did the same as I was probably doing with who knows whom.

Then he told me he had slept with her a few times but that it wasn't important, and asked me to forgive him.

And I did, I forgave him.

I started college, and he didn't like it at all. By then, he was always with his group of friends, including that girl he had been with when I was on the trip.

My parents talked to me for hours to make sure I didn't drop out of college, saying it was only four years and I would have a degree that would serve me for life, that I didn't need to work, and should focus on studying.

I kept dating Diego, but we weren't doing well.

For a while, I had felt him growing distant; he was going out with his friends more and more. He didn't study; he worked with his father. He wasn't doing badly financially, but he wasn't doing anything for his future either.

We had been dating for three and a half years when several friends and even my cousin hinted many times that he was seeing other girls. I didn't want to believe them, and it hurt that they talked about him.

One afternoon, Emilia, my best friend, one of the few I hadn't lost touch with, even chose the same major, and we studied together, came over.

"You need to open your eyes, Diego is cheating on you with two different girls."

"Don't let yourself be swayed by what others say."

"I saw it. Come with me and see for yourself."

"If you're referring to the girls who are usually in that group, they must just be friends."

"Enough, what you have is a habit or fear, and he's a bastard. You can't love that guy, and I'm sure he doesn't love you, or anyone."

"That's not true."

"I'm going to tell you directly, even if it hurts. He got a girl pregnant."

I remember sitting down because I understood that Emilia wasn't lying.

I felt intense pain.

Could he really be such a bastard?

Did I really mean nothing to him?

Was he going to be a father?

I went with her. We walked a few blocks to a park where he often spent many afternoons with his friends, as if they were still teenagers with nothing to do.

Some of his friends didn't work, and much less studied.

Others seemed high all the time.

Almost all of them spent their time drinking beer in that park, and it wasn't just one or two; they drank until they couldn't stand up on their own.

I saw him whispering in a girl's ear, she was a stunning brunette, tall and with a great body. I watched as after whispering, he brought his mouth to hers and kissed her shamelessly, right in the middle of the street, or rather, in the middle of the square and in front of his friends.

Someone must have seen me and warned him because he turned his head and looked at me.

However, he turned back to the girl and kept kissing her.

I wanted to run away.

I felt like he had stolen my life.

He betrayed me again.

I wanted to kill him.

For a few moments, I stood there watching him.

He kept kissing and hugging her.

I left.

I didn't want to go home, so I went to my friend's house.

We locked ourselves in her room, and I cried a lot.

I didn't want to believe it when everyone told me.

He kept kissing her in front of me. Did it mean he had left me?

Many times I seriously doubted him.

So many times I found out he lied to me.

And I was always afraid of him, something I never confessed even to my best friend.

It was the end of our relationship, and what hurt the most was how stupid I had been.

I wished I could feel nothing.

I wanted my heart to feel nothing.

I wanted to be made of cardboard, but my heart, which seemed like glass, shattered into pieces.

I wasn't masochistic when I accompanied Emilia; I wanted to prove her wrong, even though deep down I knew exactly what Diego was like.

Maybe, deep down, I was waiting for something like this to free myself from him.

I also knew that in front of his friends, he denied me as his girlfriend.

I felt like dying for a while.

The girl was pretty, so what? I am too.

However, I know she did nothing with her life, just like him.

Maybe they deserve each other.

I loved him, and I'm sure if she was like him, their love was very little.

I knew that with time Diego would regret it.

I hoped he wouldn't be able to forget me.

I gave him everything, body and soul.

No one will love him like I did.

But I have dignity, and this is as far as I go.

It's not like he ran after me.

He didn't, and even though it hurt, it also helped me realize that our relationship had hit rock bottom, that it no longer existed.

I finished that year, and he didn't look for me, at least not at first.

Then I started seeing him when I returned from college; he seemed regretful. I felt liberated from him, though my heart was still wounded.

He wanted to fix things between us, but I was never going to forgive him; it didn't even make sense to try.

He harassed me, bothered me, and even threatened me a few times to get back together.

I never knew if he had really become a father; I didn't care, but I did know I never wanted to see him again.

On top of that, I was eager to be independent.

So my friend, another girl from college, and I decided to rent an apartment downtown, close to the university and about an hour and a half, almost two, from our homes.

Even though we had to work for it, we avoided traveling several hours a day.

On some weekends, we went to our parents' houses.

I was fine until I saw him, so I tried not to go out when I was at my parents' house.

What I felt was more indignation than anything else.

"Valeria Ocampo."

Someone snapped me out of my thoughts.

I needed that job.

I walked anxiously into the HR office.

"Good morning."

"Please sit down, Valeria."

I did as she asked.

I looked at her expectantly.

"I see you have half a year left to graduate with a degree in business administration and that you speak two languages."

"Yes, ma'am, I speak and write in English and Italian, and I can get by in French."

"Would you be willing to learn Chinese?"

"Yes, I find it easy to learn, and I love languages. It's just that right now, I don't have the financial means or the time to do it."

She smiled at me and changed the subject.

"Your contract ends in three days. However, given your work commitment, I am offering you a permanent position."

I smiled.

"Though it's not that simple."

"Tell me."

My hopes went down the drain.

"Mr. Alejandro Zalco needs a personal assistant immediately, that is, a secretary, assistant, or whatever you want to call it. The thing is, you would need to be willing to travel with him and study Chinese. The company will pay for the course, which can be on Saturdays. I don't know how you would manage with your classes when you have to travel."

"If it gets complicated with a class, I can finish in February."

The woman smiled at me. She was pleasant, despite her reputation as a witch.