Oops, The Store Sent the Wrong Incubus

Oops, The Store Sent the Wrong Incubus

Joy Brown · Ongoing · 6.8k Words

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Introduction

Wait. I was this close to going full caveman on my incubus, and you're telling me the store sent the wrong one?

I'd bought an incubus online, hoping for one really good night with him.

But he said no. Every single time.

I racked my brain trying to tame him. Besides plotting to steamroll him into it, I'd even gone so far as to contact customer service.

The poor little chat rep just kept apologizing.

[I'm so, so sorry, hon! We checked, and we shipped you the wrong item. He's a Household-type incubus. He does NOT provide intimate services!]

[Please, please don't get any closer with him! Under the Supernatural Beings Welfare Act, incubi can't be forced into anything, and if one gets pushed to his breaking point, he can suddenly lose control and put your safety at risk!]

A cold sweat broke out down my back. I grabbed Kane's pillow and comforter and tossed them straight out of my bedroom.

I didn't expect him to do the opposite of what I'd figured. He came and knocked on my door...

Chapter 1

Wait. I was this close to going full caveman on my incubus, and you're telling me the store sent the wrong one?

I'd bought an incubus online, hoping for one really good night with him.

But he said no. Every single time.

I racked my brain trying to tame him. Besides plotting to steamroll him into it, I'd even gone so far as to contact customer service.

The poor little chat rep just kept apologizing.

[I'm so, so sorry, hon! We checked, and we shipped you the wrong item. He's a Household-type incubus. He does NOT provide intimate services!]

[Please, please don't get any closer with him! Under the Supernatural Beings Welfare Act, incubi can't be forced into anything, and if one gets pushed to his breaking point, he can suddenly lose control and put your safety at risk!]

A cold sweat broke out down my back. I grabbed Kane's pillow and comforter and tossed them straight out of my bedroom.

I didn't expect him to do the opposite of what I'd figured. He came and knocked on my door...


His voice was low and rough, with a heaviness I almost missed.

"What's that supposed to mean? You don't need me to sleep in here anymore?"

"R-right." My eyes darted everywhere but at him, shame bubbling up as I stumbled through my excuse. "I haven't been sleeping well lately. I just want to sleep alone."

Kane looked at me for a moment. His handsome brows pulled together, but in the end he didn't say a word.

He just turned around and walked off to the guest room.

He took it so easily that I let out a quiet breath of relief. And then felt a tiny bit sad about it.

Truth was, I'd always known Kane resisted me.

He didn't like being touched. He turned down every one of my requests to get frisky, over and over. Even sleeping next to me was something I'd had to bully and nag him into.

I'd put on my best Owner Voice and warned him that if he wouldn't share a room with me, I'd just buy another incubus. Only then did he drag his stuff in, scowling.

And even then, he always slept as far from me as possible, curled up with his back to me.

I'd figured I'd pulled the secret-edition slow-burn incubus, the kind you had to win over bit by bit.

Turned out he was just a chaste, wholesome gentleman who didn't want to be touched. And he honestly wasn't into me at all!

When I thought about how I'd acted around Kane these past few months, like a thirsty little goblin, my face burned.

The rep's next message popped up.

[Hon, we're really sorry. This was our mistake. Please don't leave us a one-star review (╥﹏╥)]

[Can we set you up with a full refund?]

[No, thanks,] I typed, feeling a little hollow. [He can't be my partner, but he's great in other ways.]

Because Kane really was a miracle around the house. He knew how to bake fluffy, pillowy milk bread. He knew how to wash my sheets until they smelled like fresh laundry. He even knew how to wash my hair so my ends never split.

I'd gotten kind of dependent on him.

[Understood, hon! Then let us send you a replacement. A Companion-type incubus, on the house •̆₃•̑]

I'm ashamed to say my heart skipped. A Companion-type was what I'd wanted from the very start.

If Kane couldn't get frisky, then I could get frisky with someone else, right?

I shot back an "OK" so fast I almost broke my thumb.

The bitter, heavy feeling in my chest eased up a lot.

The next morning, I woke up and flopped over on instinct. My hand landed on empty sheets.

My brain blanked for a few seconds. Then I felt a little lost.

Maybe I'd just gotten used to having Kane there. Now that he was gone, it felt weird.

I dragged myself up to get dressed and brush my teeth, and found Kane already making breakfast.

He was tall and lean, the pink little apron I'd bought him tied loosely at his waist. Sharp jawline, straight nose. Criminally handsome.

I spat out my toothpaste and cursed the seller a thousand times in my head.

Making an incubus who could only do chores this good-looking? Such a waste!

After washing up, I sat down at the table like a good girl and waited for my food.

But when Kane came out, he balanced the tray in one hand and, with the other, scooped me out of my chair and set me down in his lap.

"W-wait, what are you doing?"

I panicked and pushed against his chest, trying to keep some distance between us.

Kane caught my wrist. I was forced to look up, straight into his dark, unreadable eyes.

His face gave nothing away. I couldn't tell if he was mad or not.

"Aren't I supposed to feed you?"

Right. Back when Kane's coldness had made me so frustrated, I'd loved assigning him "relationship-building tasks."

On top of cooking for me, he had to feed me. And not the normal way, either. I had to sit in his lap and be fed, nice and slow.

At first, he'd resisted hard.

But resistance was futile. I was the owner.

And if he didn't feed me, I wouldn't eat. And if I didn't eat, he had no idea what to do with me. Eventually he just got used to it. Lately he'd even started doing it on his own.

But now? There was no way I could.

I scrambled out of his lap and back into my own chair, my heart still pounding. "No, no, it's fine. I'll just feed myself from now on."

Kane stared at me for a couple of seconds, then turned his face away. "Mm. You should learn to be independent."

Yep. He'd had a problem with it all along.

I'd just been too dense to notice.

After breakfast, Kane wolfed down my leftovers and cleared the table in a flash. Then he picked up his helmet and the e-bike keys, ready to give me a ride to work.

I rubbed the back of my neck, embarrassed.

That was another thing I'd forced him into.

Whenever he rode me to work, I got to feel up his abs from behind. A ten-minute ride always took twenty.

I used to look forward to it every single day. But now... let's not torture him anymore.

I snatched the helmet out of his hand. "You don't need to drive me anymore," I mumbled. "I'll get there on my own."

This time Kane froze. His hand hung in the air for a few seconds.

But before he could say anything, I ducked my head and bolted out the door.

If I stopped pushing him, stopped forcing him into all this stuff, he'd be happy, wouldn't he?

I'd barely been at my desk for half an hour when my phone showed a shipping notification.

The rep had left me a message: [Hon, your Companion-type incubus has shipped! Please keep an eye out for him~]

[Also, here's his profile. Please get his daily necessities ready ahead of time! ლ(°◕‵ƹ′◕ლ)]

I opened the file in our chat.

Name: Jamie Moore. Height: 5'10". Weight: 170 lbs. Owner: Annie Clark.

Hmm. He was a whole two sizes smaller than Kane.

So Kane's clothes wouldn't fit him. I'd have to buy him a couple of new things.

I added "buy clothes" to my to-do list.

After work, I happened to be out with a few coworkers doing some shopping, and I picked up a few men's shirts.

We had so much fun chatting that I didn't pull out my phone until I was standing at my own front door. That was when I saw the missed calls.

All of them from Kane.

Huh? Why was Kane calling me?

A second later, the door swung open.

His gaze landed on me, sharp and scrutinizing.

"Annie, where were you?! Why didn't you pick up?!"

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