For the Love of a Broken Luna

- MELLISA -

The beeping sound of the EKG filled the room. The windows were open and the wind kept rushing in. The pack nurse and the pack doctor were in front of me, their lips moving but I couldn't hear a word they were saying.

I just sat there, staring past them. The news they broke to me just now kept playing in my head; they said…. ‘Your pup didn't make it. We are sorry.’

My grip on the bedsheets tightened. I lowered my head, tears trickling on the sheets. My lips parted and I screamed. “Ahhh!!!”

The nurses and the doctor jumped, scampering back in shock. They stared at me like I was mad but I didn't care. I wrapped my arms around my stomach and wept harder.

“Leave. All of you. Now!” My maid ordered. She practically forced them out the door. “If any of you breathes a word of this, my lady will have you all banished; both the innocent and the guilty.” She threatened them before she slammed the door and then rushed to me.

“My lady…” she called out in her soft, sober voice. She gently sat on the bed and let me lay my head on her shoulders.

“I'm going to kill her.” I muttered, my breath shaking. “I'm… I'm going to kill her. My baby is dead because of her. I'm going to kill that Luna queen.”

“My lady…. please,” she stroked my hair. “Please just focus on yourself, please. You know you can't touch her. She is a Luna and you are… you are just a breeder the alpha favors. Please my lady, please just stay out of trouble. You can't lose anything else.”

I clenched my teeth, burying my face in her chest. My hands balled a fist full of her cloth and squeezed hard. I trembled in her arms, crying so hard my head throbbed and my throat ached.

What hurt the most wasn't that I lost my pup, the only good thing that had happened to me since I became a slave in this cold palace. It was that I couldn't even avenge my pup. My baby died because I was too weak to protect him. Now again, I would be too weak to fight for him. Was I really that worthless?

Suddenly my sobs seized. My lips shut and my hands let go of the maid’s shirt. I pulled away from her and I slipped down from the hospital bed. She watched me, staring at my blank face. I turned my back on her and went to stand by the window.

For a moment, I took a long look at this beautiful city palace, this paradise. A weary smile pulled up my lips. I think I know what to do now.

“Naya.”

“Yes my lady.” The maid rose from the bed.

“Get me my clothes and my makeup. Get some water too, I want to wash my face.” I ordered. She bowed and left. Some minutes later, she returned and I got dressed. We left the hospital and went straight into the main palace.

As I passed, the other maids shifted away, hugging the walls just to keep their distance. “Stay away from her or Luna's anger will descend on you too.” A maid murmured to the others. They hurried off immediately. I sighed. This was my life everyday yet I still couldn't get used to it.

“Breeder.” A voice called out from behind. I paused. The person came over, standing in front of me. She was wearing the colors of Luna's servants. She pursed her lips and carried herself so brazenly. “The alpha is looking for you in his room. If I were you, I won't go there unless you want to court death again because Luna will not be pleased.”

I glanced at her from the corner of my eyes. A mocking chuckle escaped my lips. “Tell your queen that Melissa the breeder says, ‘ Go fuck yourself.’”

The servant’s eyes widened. Naya gasped in shock beside me. She nudged me immediately. “My lady please don't. You will get into trouble again.” She whispered. I walked out on them, leaving Naya who insisted on apologizing on my behalf.

If today was the day before yesterday, perhaps I would have cared about how the queen would feel but not after she pushed me down the stairs and I lost my baby. I won't be a pin cushion for her jealousy anymore. Today, I was going to end everything.

I sauntered into the alpha’s room. The guards shut the door behind me. Alpha Fredrick Lancaster, the man I thought I would one day learn to love, was lying in his king-sized circle-shaped bed with golden sheets and golden silk curtains dropping from the high ceiling, down to the floor.

Immediately our eyes crossed. He grinned and licked his lips. “I heard you tripped on the stairs. How are you feeling now?” He jumped down from the bed and came to me, going behind me.

“You heard that I tripped?”

“Mhmm.” He murmured a reply. He wasn't going to have this conversation, that's what his words told me.

“I also heard you are all better now. That's great news right?” His arms wrapped around my stomach and he pulled me close.

I clenched my jaw and forced out my breath. My hands balled into fits and squeezed tight. I tried to control the anger building up inside me. I blinked a few times to hold back the tears too. ‘Our baby just died but he didn't know that. He didn't ask me if the baby was okay? Hell he didn't at least try to fucking figure out what really happened to me.’

He pressed me against his ripped body and he kissed my shoulder, his breath brushing against my skin. I felt sensations rippling through my body but they didn't make me feel ecstatic, they made me feel disgusted.

“Fredrick,” I whispered. “I'm not supposed to do something like this. Not now while I'm carrying our pup.” I lied.

“Oh yh.” He heaved, lifting his head. “My sweet sweet breeder. Hurry up with that baby thing. I really miss our nights together.” He chuckled lashiviously. I felt his hands slip away. He wandered off, going to the counter.

I turned to look at him, helplessly waiting for him to be something other than himself today; to give me a reason to think he wasn't so bad. A tear trickled down my cheek

‘That's it? I fell down over a hundred stairs and this is all he has to say?’ I took a small bow and quietly left the room. I hurried to my room, shut the door and crumbled to the floor. I buried my face in my knees and wailed.

I was fed up. I wouldn't take this anymore. I was going to go through with the plan I made this morning. They all have to pay for what they did to me.

12 MIDNIGHT

SECOND COURTYARD

I staggered down the grass-covered path, my bare feet sinking into the dirt. I had a cigarette and a lighter on one hand. On the other hand, I dragged something. The sound of water pouring on the grass lingered around me.

I came upon the biggest tree in the courtyard. I stopped, dropped what I was dragging and turned to face the beautiful city palace that was my nightmare.

I shut my eyes and drew a long breath, allowing the heavy stench of gasoline to fill my nostrils. I exhaled and I lit my cigar, took a few puffs and I dropped it on the grass.

It caught fire. Like a flood enveloping the city, the fire spread, lighting up everything in its path. It raged towards the palace, where I had poured the most gasoline. Within seconds alarms were buzzing, wolves screaming and the fire getting bigger.

I looked up to the moon and whispered. “My baby, I'm going to reunite with you soon.”

I shut my eyes. In that moment, while I prepared myself to burn with the palace, my mind drifted to the past. I remembered the day all this began. That night, three years ago, when I made the biggest mistake of my life.