Expelled for Laughing at a Funeral in Zombie Apocalypse

Expelled for Laughing at a Funeral in Zombie Apocalypse

Cole · Completed · 8.0k Words

234
Hot
439
Views
3
Added
Add to Shelf
Start Reading
Share:facebooktwitterpinterestwhatsappreddit

Introduction

At my boss's mother's funeral, I couldn't hold back my laughter, and as a result, I was treated as a lunatic, stuffed into a garbage cannon, and launched naked into an apocalyptic forest full of zombies. Everyone thought I was doomed, but they didn't know—I had been reborn 1,001 times. Unarmed and surrounded by the zombie horde, about to be torn to shreds, in desperation I clung to the last clue... When I finally uncovered the truth that could overturn everything, I laughed from the bottom of my heart. This time, I would personally end this greatest lie.

Chapter 1

"Ha!" I couldn't hold it in. My facial expression relaxed, and I laughed out loud.

"What was that sound?" The priest was startled by the sudden laughter in the quiet, solemn atmosphere.

A man in a black suit covered his face with a handkerchief, weeping. He was the boss of our shelter company. We all called him Mr. G. Today was his mother's funeral.

Discovering that the funeral proceedings had been interrupted, he put away his sorrowful expression, his face turning iron-blue.

"Someone is causing trouble," the secretary whispered to him.

"Hahaha..." The laughter grew louder. I could no longer control myself.

The people around looked at me with fearful expressions. Their faces were complex—I couldn't tell whether they were infected by my demonic, wild laughter or felt sympathy for what I was about to endure.

"Enough!" Mr. G rushed onto the platform and grabbed the microphone. "This is outrageous! Stop this at once!"

He pointed at me angrily, and everyone looked in the direction of his finger.

Among a sea of dark suits, a man with an explosion of hair, wearing a white lab coat, was laughing uncontrollably, clutching his stomach.

I was laughing so hard I could barely stand, forced to kneel with one hand on the ground for support.

The sound nearly pierced the heavens, as if mocking everything in this world.

The security guards stood stunned until Mr. G kicked one of them viciously. They finally reacted, rushing forward to pin me to the ground and stuffing a rag in my mouth.

"Throw him out! Now! Immediately!" Mr. G said expressionlessly, holding his forehead.

No one dared to breathe loudly, afraid they might be next.

The atmosphere of the funeral was completely ruined by me. Many people bowed their heads, biting their lips—not because they were particularly sad, but because they were afraid of failing to hold back their laughter like me and being punished together.

Some even bit their tongues until they bled, just to suppress their laughter.

My booming laughter echoed from the stairwell—while waiting for the elevator, I had spat out what they'd stuffed in my mouth, and more laughter escaped my throat. "You ignorant fools!" I laughed and shook my head.

"Hey!" Someone finally couldn't hold it in. He grinned and let out a laugh, then immediately realized what stupid thing he'd done. Fortunately, he could still stop.

His expression transformed into painful sobbing in 0.1 seconds. He fell to his knees, beating his chest and stamping his feet. He looked at the photo of the boss's mother, covering his face in tears, as if it were his own mother lying in that coffin.

Mr. G impatiently waved his hand. "Enough! Continue with the proceedings, priest!"

The priest cleared his throat. "May her kind, noble soul rest in heaven. We offer her our purest, highest blessings..."

"Laugh if you want to. I know you almost couldn't hold it in either," I said to the two security guards escorting me.

I noticed that although they held me between them, their free hands were pinching their own thighs, desperately suppressing their laughter.

They didn't understand me, and I understood that. Not everyone could start over like I could.

I didn't know why, but I had the ability to be reborn. Until now, I had been reborn 1,000 times. Each time I died, my consciousness would slowly revive, and when I opened my eyes, I would find myself waking up in the lab among the experimental equipment, time seemingly returning to those days of researching the "zombie virus antidote."

Through 1,000 cycles of reincarnation, I had clearly realized one thing—behind the "zombie virus, zombie vaccine, and zombie antidote," there existed a massive conspiracy. The scientific spirit compelled me to uncover the truth.

So, this should be my 1,001st rebirth? I wondered what method of death awaited me this time.

The elevator descended all the way to the bottom level. There was a garbage disposal hatch here, shaped like a cannon.

They operated the cannon, aiming at the forest several kilometers away.

"I'm very sorry, Dr. Dick." One of them tugged at my explosion of hair and removed my clothes.

"Don't blame us." The fat security guard stuffed a flashlight in my mouth. "Thanks for helping with my birthday before. You should find this useful."

"That's enough!" The thin security guard shook his head. "Outside is full of zombies. If he uses a flashlight, he's definitely asking to die."

"Ready!" They covered their ears.

"3! 2! 1! Fire!"

I was ejected from the garbage cannon like a shooting star, stark naked. I bit down hard on the flashlight in my mouth, no longer daring to laugh.

After tracing a reasonably graceful arc, I struggled to grab onto the crown of the tallest tree in the forest. The acceleration nearly snapped it.

"Thank God!" I wiped away sweat, grateful for this thrilling landing. I didn't want to die from a fall before I'd even started anything this time.

When I steadied myself on the branch, I spat out the flashlight and gripped it in my hand.

On the distant horizon, the apocalyptic fortress towered into the clouds, its iron-black walls impregnable.

I raised my arms and shouted—"Just wait and see! I will prove that my theory is correct!"

Last Chapters

You Might Like 😍

The Legacy Game

The Legacy Game

1.8k Views · Ongoing · Quill Pen
At Corvain Academy, power isn't earned in the classroom—it is inherited in secret.

When scholarship student Chris Linds stumbles onto a mystery someone has killed to protect, she becomes the next target. The only person standing between her and death is Ashen Ford, the academy's cold, untouchable Student Council President—and heir to one of Corvain's founding families.

As anonymous invitations summon twelve students into the legendary Legacy Game, alliances fracture, secrets surface, and every challenge brings another deadly truth to light. But the greatest secret isn't who will win.

It's why one winner vanished without a trace... and why someone will do anything to make sure history repeats itself.
My Billionaire Husband's Secret

My Billionaire Husband's Secret

3.4k Views · Ongoing · Linda
After college, Lucas pursued me relentlessly.

He was the CEO of the Blackwood Group — a man whose wealth and power eclipsed ninety-nine percent of the world.

He was gentle. Romantic. Attentive. I fell for him fast.

But a year into our marriage, I began to notice something — a pattern.

Lucas's sexual appetite was intense — he wanted me almost every night. Yet every single month, he arranged a solo trip to send me away. I told myself it was his way of spoiling me.

Then a message arrived from someone called Sweet An.

Do you really know your husband?

From that day on, my life filled with shadows.

I suspected my husband of having an affair.

When Lucas and I made love, something felt wrong — his body too large, too much, like something I couldn't explain.

I heard sounds during sex — animal sounds, like something feral had crawled into bed with us.

My best friend Mia said: "There are men sick enough to let dogs fuck their wives."

The family doctor, Daisy, told me: "You could never stay by Lucas's side forever. Your background doesn't make you worthy of being his wife. Do you understand?"

I went looking for whoever had been tearing my marriage apart. I fought to win my husband back.

But the deeper I searched, the larger the secret grew — something far darker hiding beneath this supposed betrayal.

Does Lucas truly love me?

And why, out of everyone in the world, did he choose to marry me?
Rejected By My Family, Desired By The Mafia

Rejected By My Family, Desired By The Mafia

8.1k Views · Ongoing · Rain_R
Camille Laurent was stolen at birth. Swapped by a greedy nanny, abandoned without a second thought, and erased from her rightful place in one of the most powerful families in the country.
While the real heiress struggled to survive, the nanny’s daughter, Talia, was raised in luxury as the beloved jewel of the Laurent family, pampered by Camille’s parents, adored by her three brothers, and even promised to the prestigious Matteo Devereux through a childhood engagement arranged by their grandparents.
Then the truth came out.
Six months ago, Camille was finally brought back to the Laurent family. To protect the family reputation and prove their devotion to their bloodline, the Laurent patriarch transferred 35% of his personal shares into Camille’s name overnight, instantly making her one of the wealthiest heiresses in the country.
It brought anxiety to all the Laurent family. But what they don’t know…is that Camille never needed them.
Behind her elegant smile lies a woman filled with secrets powerful enough to shake the whole family. She's a miraculous healer capable of curing the incurable poisons.
Yet despite everything, her family still chooses Talia.
Every accusation against Talia is forgiven. Every scheme against Camille is brushed aside. Even Matteo, the man who was supposed to be Camille’s fiancé—cannot let go of the woman he always believed belonged by his side.
But while the Laurent family underestimates Camille, another man begins to see exactly who she is.
Dante Moretti.
The ruthless heir of an old-money dynasty. A billionaire CEO worshipped by the public…and the merciless king of a criminal empire hidden beneath the city’s glittering surface. When Dante is poisoned by a rival syndicate with a deadly toxin no doctor can cure, he offers a fortune for anyone who can save him.
Only Camille can. Their deal is simple: she becomes his personal physician, and he gives her anything she wants.
Ex-Wife, Current Wife

Ex-Wife, Current Wife

9k Views · Completed · Aria Sinclair​
She gave everything to a man who never wanted her—now, she’s taking back her life.

For three years, she lived in the shadow of a loveless marriage. She was the woman everyone loved to hate, the one who supposedly "stole" him from his first love. She endured his cold indifference, raised their son—who struggles with a speech impediment—in silence, and traded her own brilliant career for the thankless role of a trophy wife.

But when his long-lost love returns, she is unceremoniously pushed aside to make room for the "real" family.

Enough was enough.

After he publicly humiliates her and chooses the mistress’s daughter over his own son during a birthday party, something inside her finally snaps. She doesn't just want out of the marriage; she wants her life back. With a secret talent for design and a newfound resolve, she walks away from the gilded cage of his estate.

But as she rises from the ashes of her failed marriage to reclaim her status as a top-tier designer, he realizes the woman he treated as a disposable pawn was the only one who truly held his world together.

Now, the woman who once begged for his attention is no longer looking back. Will he be able to earn her forgiveness, or is he finally too late?
MOONLIT CHASE

MOONLIT CHASE

1k Views · Ongoing · awakewithyou8
I should've taken the damn bus.

But no, I had to walk through the park at midnight like an idiot. Now I've seen something I can't unsee—a massive black wolf tearing apart three men, then shifting into the hottest guy I've ever laid eyes on.

Kieran Vaughn. Wealthy lawyer, werewolf, and apparently, he thinks I'm his mate.

Here's the problem: I don't do relationships. I definitely don't do supernatural things. I absolutely don't do rich guys who think they can control my life just because their inner wolf has decided I smell like home.

When hunters start targeting me to get to him, Kieran drags me into his pristine penthouse for "protection." Now I'm living with a man who looks at me like I'm his last meal, whose touch sets my skin on fire, and who's barely holding onto his control.

He says everyone he loves dies. I say that's not my problem except it is because I'm falling for this broken, dangerous man and his beast.

And in his world? Love will get you killed.
Letters to a Dark Prince

Letters to a Dark Prince

881 Views · Ongoing · nightbloom06
Mara Kim has never belonged anywhere… until someone decided she did.
Thrown into Isteros Academy—a world of old money, blood money, and cruel social games—she's an outsider by birth and an afterthought by design. Her sister Solyn is the school's untouchable queen and Mara is her favorite target.
Everyone expects Atreus to treat his fiancée’s scholarship sister like everyone else does—as if she doesn’t matter.
Instead, his dorm room sits directly across from hers, close enough that she can see his light go out at night. Some nights, he climbs the old maintenance trellis just to check on her. He teaches her chess. He shows up exactly when something's gone wrong—and never once asks to be thanked for it.
"Don't fall in love with one piece," he warns her, over a board neither of them treats like a game anymore. "It punishes the person who only sees half of it."
Mara doesn't understand why the boy who's supposed to make her life harder keeps quietly making it easier—not until she realizes the anonymous stranger she's been writing to every week already has a name.
His.
He doesn't know he's writing to her, either.
By the time they find out, it's too late to stop what's already happening. Far too dangerous for anyone to find out.
In an empty studio, in the middle of a rainstorm, she asks him: 'Am I the kind of girl who kisses a boy engaged to my sister?'
He doesn't answer.
So she asks: 'What are we?’
He told her not to fall in love with one piece.
She fell anyway.
And he was never far behind.
Omega Bound

Omega Bound

2.8m Views · Completed · Veronica White
Ayla Frost is a beautiful, rare omega. Kidnapped, tortured, and trafficked to rogue clans and corrupt alphas to do with as they pleased.  Kept alive in her cage, broken and abandoned by her wolf, she becomes mute and has given up on hope for a better life until one explosion changes everything. 

Thane Knight is the alpha of the Midnight Pack of the La Plata Mountain Range, the largest wolf shifter pack in the world. He is an alpha by day and hunts the shifter trafficking ring with his group of mercenaries by night. His hunt for vengeance leads to one raid that changes his life. 

Tropes:
Touch her and die/Slow burn romance/Fated Mates/Found family twist/Close circle betrayal/Cinnamon roll for only her/Traumatized heroine/Rare wolf/Hidden powers/Knotting/Nesting/Heats/Luna/Attempted assassination
My Alpha's Fake Luna

My Alpha's Fake Luna

3k Views · Completed · Rosalind Claire
"I hate you."

Those were the last words my Alpha whispered before he severed our bond.

I believed our marriage was over.

I was wrong.

For two years, I thought Alpha Michael never loved me.

Every misunderstanding pushed us farther apart.

Every silence broke another piece of my heart.

While another woman slowly took my place.

But everything changed after the death of the Grand Alpha.

My mate began watching me.

Protecting me.

Holding me whenever I fell.

Looking at me like he was terrified of losing me.

If he hated me...

Why did he keep risking everything for me?

And why did everyone panic the moment I finally chose another future?
The Spy Who Left

The Spy Who Left

2.1k Views · Completed · Orion Vale
"She's naive. A pretty little socialite who got lucky marrying above her station."
"I still can't believe she actually did it. Aria Hart, filing for divorce. Who saw that coming?"
"How long do we think it'll take before she comes crawling back?" Another voice joins the conversation.
"Three days," Victoria declares. "Five at most. She has no money, no skills, no family. Where's she going to go?"
When Aria Chen divorced billionaire Leon Hart, New York's elite sneered, betting she'd crawl back within days. She never did.
Three years later, the world is rocked when Dr. Aria Vale, CEO of a revolutionary cybersecurity empire, steps into the spotlight. The mysterious genius who built a billion-dollar company from nothing is none other than Leon's discarded wife, the woman everyone thought was just a pretty ornament.
Now, every powerful man wants the queen Leon threw away a renowned scientist seeking partnership, a financial titan proposing an empire, and an actor offering devotion. Each sees the brilliance Leon ignored.
Then Leon discovers the truth: Aria's sacrifices, her secret double life, and the daughter she's been raising without him. For the first time, the man who once took her for granted must fight for her love. But can he compete with men who valued her from the beginning?
A story of love, betrayal, and power where the king must kneel before the queen who never needed saving.
Accardi

Accardi

1.3m Views · Completed · Allison Franklin
“I thought we discussed this earlier, Weakness? I warned you. His death is on your hands.”
“I thought you said you were done chasing me?” Gen mocked.
“I am done chasing you.”
Before she could formulate a witty remark, Matteo threw her down. She landed hard on her back atop his dining room table. She tried to sit up when she noticed what he was doing. His hands were working on his belt. It came free of his pants with a violent yank. She collapsed back on her elbows, her mouth gaping open at the display. His face was a mask of sheer determination, his eyes were a dark gold swimming with heat and desire. His hands wrapped around her thighs and pulled her to the edge of the table. He glided his fingers up her thighs and hooked several around the inside of her panties. His knuckles brushed her dripping sex.
“You’re soaking wet, Genevieve. Tell me, was it me that made you this way or him?” his voice told her to be careful with her answer. His knuckles slid down through her folds and she threw her head back as she moaned. “Weakness?”
“You…” she breathed.


Genevieve loses a bet she can’t afford to pay. In a compromise, she agrees to convince any man her opponent chooses to go home with her that night. What she doesn’t realize when her sister’s friend points out the brooding man sitting alone at the bar, is that man won’t be okay with just one night with her. No, Matteo Accardi, Don of one of the largest gangs in New York City doesn’t do one night stands. Not with her anyway.
My Husband's Secretary Wore My Dress

My Husband's Secretary Wore My Dress

4k Views · Ongoing · Rosalind Claire
"She saved me, Vivian. Not you."

Those words shattered Vivian's heart.

For three years, she endured her husband's coldness and his secretary's endless provocations.

She never knew that the woman he trusted most had stolen her identity.

Or that the man she loved had secretly loved her all along.

When the truth finally came out, it was already too late.

Vivian had divorced him.

She had disappeared with his unborn child.

And she had no intention of coming back.

Five years later, the former ballerina returned as the sole heiress of a powerful family.

Standing beside her was a little girl with eyes identical to Caden Lux's.

The billionaire who once ignored her had gone mad.

He blocked her in the dressing room, knelt before her, and even accepted the possibility that another man had taken his place.

Because losing his pride was nothing.

Losing Vivian had nearly killed him.

But after everything he had done…

Could she ever forgive the man who chose another woman over his own wife?
The rejected white luna

The rejected white luna

8.8k Views · Completed · gabrielgladys37
Aria was the daughter of the Alpha of the Silver moon pack born into a life of strength and legacy but instead of respect, she is overlooked by the members of her own pack due to her weak wolf. She had always wanted to have a mate just like everyone else but on the night of the mating ceremony, her dreams came crashing down when her own mate rejects her publicly choosing another.Aria is left humiliated but something inside her refuses to stay broken. As tension rises and unseen forces begin to shift, Aria starts to realize there may be more to her than anyone ever believed and when Aria stumbled on another pack and found out he is her second chance mate. Aria is stunned especially when she finds out who he is. what happens when Aria finds out that her second chance mate who she thought loves her was working for the Lycan king? And somehow finds herself in his kingdom? Would she be weighed down by betrayal? Or would she come out strong? What happens when she found out her fated mate who had rejected her wants her back? Would she go to him ? Or forgive her second chance mate?